Falling Slowly
by kdcullen
Summary: After Edward refuses to change Bella, she takes matters into her own hands. Feeling angry and betrayed, he flees, leaving the Cullen's to deal with a newborn broken-hearted Bella. How will they repair their bruised relationship and live normal again?
1. Final Decision

_**Disclaimer:**_ Obviously, I don't own the Twilight series or any of the characters.

**This is my first Twilight story. It's set in Eclipse, and begins after Rosalie tells Bella the story of her human life. The italicized opening comes from Stephenie Meyer herself, and I just decided to pick up after Rosalie's exit. Please, let me know what you think of it. I'm used to my own creative writing, so I'm kind of new at this.**

* * *

**Bella.**

_"I know you're frustrated that he's keeping you locked up like this, but don't give him a hard time when he gets back. He loves you more than you know. It terrifies him to be away from you." She got up silently and ghosted to the door. "Goodnight, Bella," she whispered as she shut it behind herself._

I replayed her story in my head, over and over again. Somehow, I just couldn't get her words to sink in. I had always been so curious about Rosalie; always wondering what it was about me that she didn't like. I had asked Edward frequently, but was always left frustrated when he changed the subject. But as I leaned against my pillows, I felt quite glad that he had kept her story from me.

I sighed, and cuddled up onto the leather couch. The material felt cold against my skin, but I didn't mind. Maybe Edward would realize that there is no need for the ridiculously large bed that dominated the majority of his bedroom, and take it back. I turned to my side, facing the back cushions of the couch. As I awaited the arrival of sleep, my thoughts kept going back to Rosalie. I understood that she yearned for a human life, but why was that my fault? Why was I being frowned upon for what I wanted to do with my life? I didn't want to sit old and grayed on a porch with Edward. I didn't want a normal life with a normal job. It was plain for any of the Cullens to see, that I wasn't normal. Edward was what I wanted in life, and the only way I could keep him, was to be changed.

The plan was set. After our wedding, I was going to become one of them. I was_ really _going to join the family. The thought of this brought a smile upon my face. Sure, the idea of being a blood-thirsty newborn was a downer, but just thinking of spending forever with Edward pushed any negative thoughts aside. The slumber was finally beginning to seep into my body, and my eyelids suddenly felt heavy. I inhaled a breath, before allowing them to close, and falling away to sweet dreams of my Edward.

* * *

**Edward.**

I was so glad to be home. Leaving Bella was torturous, but I had to hunt. She was always so determined to push our limits, so it was always necessary to be prepared to give in. One of these days, I just might. She had a way of being irresistible, and it was amazing that I always had the strength to stop myself. As I neared the staircase, I was bombarded with the thoughts of my family. I didn't let them phase me as I climbed the stars, two at a time, until I heard Rosalie.

_She thinks she'll be happy with being a vampire. She doesn't know what it's really like. _I stopped at her door, frozen to the spot. I pushed open the wooden door, and entered the room that Emmett and herself shared. She stood next to her window, gazing intently into the forest.

"Don't change her, Edward." I sighed. This wasn't the first time Rosalie had tried to talk me about this. She was the only one, besides myself, that was dead set against Bella's immortality. I had caved, though. I promised her the one thing I wanted so badly to take back. But I couldn't do it. It was what she wanted, and I wouldn't upset her or go back on my word. Rosalie turned around, as if reading my own thoughts.

"It may be what she wants now, but once you change her, you'll regret it. She'll hate this life," she spat angrily.

"You don't know that, Rosalie," I kept my voice calm and low, knowing that Bella was sleeping just a few rooms over. She chuckled bitterly, shaking her head as she glared daggers at me.

"You don't know it either, Edward. You're going to destroy her. You're going to turn her into a _monster_." Her eyes narrowed at the word. I gulped, and instinctively, my hand flew up to my face, and my fingers were pinching the bridge of my nose. It was an action I did when I was angry, and Rosalie knew that. She knew I was weakening. She sighed once more, before shifting her eyes back upon the scenery that lived beyond the window.

"Don't do it, Edward," she muttered, more gentle this time. I turned my back to her, and exited quietly, closing the door behind me. I shuffled further down the hall, until I reached my own door. Opening it, I smiled immediately. Bella was cuddled up on the couch. I rolled my eyes as I stepped closer to her. Somehow, I knew that she wasn't going to be reasonable about the bed. I kneeled down to her level, allowing my eyes to linger on her angelic face.

She was perfect as she was. She was human. I sighed, and closed my eyes, trying to vision my sweet, beautiful Bella as a vampire. She would never have children, she would never have a career, she would never see Charlie or Renee, or even Jacob. She would always want blood. She would hate it.

My eyes snapped open, and I felt the realization of Rosalie's argument finally beginning to fall into place. I stared at her face again. She was going to hate me for my change of mind, but it was something that I couldn't do. She didn't need to become a vampire. I would stay by her side for the rest of her life. The rest of her _human_ life.

And that's my final decision.


	2. Broken Promises

**Bella.**

I shivered, reaching for the blanket as a sudden gust of chilly air touched the skin on my shoulders. My fingers fumbled for the cloth, but I was only met with a pair of icy cold hands. My eyes opened immediately, and I smiled silently when I was met with a pair of topaz eyes. Even in the dark, they were ridiculously hypnotizing. I pulled myself up, and leaned into him. I shivered, but kept my face straight. I'd rather freeze than have him pull away. As if he actually could read my mind, he leaned down to retrieve the fallen blanket from off of the floor. He wrapped it around my shoulders tightly, before pulling me back into his chest.

"I missed you," I muttered against the fabric of his t-shirt. He leaned his head down, and I felt his chilling breath on my head. His lips pressed against my forehead, and I smiled once more.

"I've missed you too, love. It's unbearable to be away from you." I inhaled his scent, letting the aroma fill my nostrils. The action caused sudden dizziness, but I didn't mind. He chuckled, his eyes watching down at me. I felt the familiar red blush creep to my cheeks, and silently thanked God that it was too dark in the room for him to notice.

"So, Rosalie and I had a .. chat, I guess you could say," I announced. I felt him tense, and I lifted my head to look at his face. He nodded, his jaw hard.

"Yes, I did as well. She didn't frighten you too much with her story, did she?" I shook my head, even though I knew that I would always picture Rosalie in a wedding dress committing murder. I shivered at the mental picture, and Edward wrapped the blanket tighter around my shoulders. I glanced up at him again, but his attention was focused on the ceiling. I pulled an arm from warm shelter of my blanket, and touched his face. He flinched, but smiled down at me. I let my fingers run across the hard skin on his cheek. He closed his eyes, allowing his face to fit it into my palm.

"What did you talk to Rosalie about?" I asked, after a few minutes. I continued to keep my gaze on his face. He didn't speak, but the way he was looking at me was odd. I struggled to sit up, but he kept me firm again his chest. I sighed loudly.

"No answer? That can't be good, Edward," I muttered, frustrated. He and the rest of the Cullens had this game they played. I liked to call it _Keep Bella In the Dark_. They didn't know they were playing it, yet they were very skilled at it. I looked at his face again, and scowled when his eyes returned back to the ceiling. I balled my fist up, and pounded it lightly against his chest. I winced. Punching a vampire was the equivalent to punching a brick wall.

"It's late, Bella. You should sleep. We'll talk in the morning," he cooed into my ear. I opened my mouth to protest, but was overcome with a yawn instead. I heard him chuckle once more. I sighed, and decided not to start anything tonight.

"Tomorrow," I warned him. He smiled down at me, before kissing my forehead once more.

The sunlight poured in through Edward's window as morning approached. It danced upon my eyelids, making me groan in annoyance. Sunlight in Forks was the sign that it was going to be a bad day. And today was no exception. As my eyes fluttered open, I realized that my breathtaking beautiful vampire of a boyfriend wasn't by my side like he usually was. I was surrounded by pillows, and covered with a thick comforter. I groaned when I noticed that I was on the bed. Edward must've moved me here after I fell asleep. I glanced around the room, but he wasn't in here either. I sighed, and lay back. A bad start to a bad day. I could already feel it.

I groaned as I sat back up, throwing the covers off of me. My feet touched the ground, and I leaned back, stretching my arms out as a yawn escaped my mouth. I opened the door, and took quiet footsteps to the top of the staircase. I could hear Alice's quick voice from downstairs. I sat down at the top step, and leaned closer. She was arguing with somebody.

"It isn't going to end well, Edward. Why are you changing your mind?" she hissed angrily. I heard Edward sigh, and my heart immediately soared. This had to do with me. They were discussing me. I leaned closer, allowing my body to move closer to the edge.

"I can't promise her something that I know I can't do-" I frowned, my eyebrows burrowing together.

"That's just it! You already promised her! Everything is set! If you think she's going to be okay with this, than you obviously don't know Bella at all," she spat. It was silent for a moment, and I continued to lean closer to the edge, to hear if they were whispering. Knowing them, they were probably having conversations in their head. Suddenly, a loud pound from downstairs erupted, and Alice's shrill voice screamed my name as I began to stumble backwards down the staircase. I closed my eyes, waiting for the pain, but felt cold hands around me. I opened my eyes, to see Emmett smiling down at me. He was laughing as he set me on my feet.

"Doing a little eavesdropping, are we?" he asked, still laughing. The blood rushed to my cheeks yet again, and I cringed. I knew they were both behind me. I could hear Alice trying to stifle a laugh. I turned my head, and met Edward's cold gaze. I quickly glanced at the ground. Alice sighed. She pulled on Emmett's arm.

"Let's give them some privacy." Emmett was still chuckling when Alice pulled him out of the room. I kept myself silent, not daring to look at Edward's face. It was like this for a few minutes. The tension was killing me, and when I looked up, Edward was staring at me intently. I growled in anger. He smiled.

"What the hell is going?" I snapped, crossing my arms over my chest. He stiffened, and I knew this wasn't going to be easy. "And spare me the dramatic silence. Tell me now!"

"There has been a change in your future." He spoke slowly, as if trying to break it down for me. I frowned again, my forehead crinkling in confusion. What about my future? My future was him. My future was an eternity long.

"Explain, please?"

"There are some things that I promised, that I need to take back, and I would appreciate it if we could discuss this without raising our voices," he murmured. I was still confused. He hadn't made any promises to me lately. There was only one promise, and that was to change me. Oh, no. Oh, no, no, no. My eyes widened, and I felt my throat go dry. He noticed, and grimaced.

"Bella, please," he pleaded. He reached for my arm, but I yanked it away.

"No! You promised! You're going to change me, and we're going to spend forever together!" I screeched. He was pinching the bridge of his nose again. Oh, how I hated that. How could he be angry? I wasn't the one who promised forever, and then snatched it right back. I gulped, and stepped closer. Maybe if I could keep calm, I could talk him back into the decision. My hand flew up to his face, and I held it there. I stared at his eyes.

"You're going to let me get old. You're going to let me .. die," I muttered, my voice breaking on the last word. He cringed. His hands cradled my face now, and I felt defeat. My heartbeat was increasing now, as I prepared myself for the words that he was about to speak.

"That's exactly what I'm going to do. And when you die, I will follow." I closed my eyes. Anger was pulsing through my veins, and I couldn't take it anymore. So, that's what he had discussed with Rosalie last night. She had convinced him to change his mind. I was shaking as I placed my hands against his chest, and pushed with all the strength I had. I didn't have enough of it to knock him off of me, but the gesture startled him, and he released his grip. Ignoring my belongings that were still upstairs, I began to run. I heard his pleas for me to stop, but I couldn't.

I was running so fast, but I knew that he could easily catch up to me if he wanted. Luckily, it didn't look like he was. I stopped, hunching over to lean on my knees, as I tried to regain my lost breath. The betrayal and hurt was stabbing at me like a knife. I felt the tears finally start to form, as I dropped onto the cold hard ground. My arms wrapped around my knees, as I rocked myself back and fourth.


	3. Bitten

**Bella.**

I couldn't tell you how long I had been sitting there, nestled into the coldness of the grass below me. The air was chilly, but the flimsy material of my pajamas made it intensify. I wrapped my arms closer to my body, rubbing my fingers against them in a poor attempt to create warm friction. Where was Edward? Of course, I was angry. I was more than angry, but I needed him. I'd always need him, even when I didn't want him.

A rustle of leaves moved from behind me. I whipped my head up, and turned around. I expected it to be Edward, but was disappointed when I locked eyes with a young woman. I frowned as I studied her. She had long curly blonde hair that cascaded down below her breasts. Her skin was unusually pale, and her eyes- Oh. She was a vampire. I would never mistake that unforgettable topaz color for anything else. I gulped, and backed away slowly. She smiled.

"Are you okay?" she asked, stepping closer to me. My heartbeat quickened as I scrambled to stand myself up. Where was Edward, damnit? Didn't he care that I was on the verge of becoming somebody's dinner? She took another step closer, and I jumped back further. She frowned.

"My boyfriend is a vampire. You hurt me, and you'll have to answer to his entire family," I spat boldly. She blinked in confusion, sighed, and took a few step backs. She bit her bottom lip as she studied me. Her eyes washed over me for a few seconds, before she let out a silently gasp.

"You're Isabella Swan, aren't you?"

"How do you know my name?" I felt myself moving backward again. My back touched something hard, and my fingers moved quickly behind me to feel what it was. I gulped when I felt the rough surface of bark on my fingertips. I was cornered. She put her hands in front of her, as if defending herself. I turned to look at the forest. Surely, Alice would have seen this by now. They would've came in an instant.

"Everybody knows who you are. You're a celebrity in the vampire world!" she exclaimed excitedly. I chuckled bitterly.

"What do you want, then? An autograph?" I muttered in fear. She watched my eyes for another second, before letting another gasp. She jumped back suddenly, her arms still in front of her.

"Forgive me! I don't mean you any harm! I'm Matilda, I hunt animals," she announced. I immediately felt a wave of calmness sweep over me, and I looked around to see if Jasper was around. No. I sighed, and my shoulders fell in relief. She was laughing softly as I pushed myself off of the tree. I hesitantly took a few steps toward her, and raised my hand out. She took it, shaking it gently.

"Nice to meet you, Matilda. Do you know the Cullen's?" I asked, crossing my arms over my chest. She nodded her head.

"Oh, no. I'm just passing through on my way to California. I heard crying, and found you here. Is everything okay?" she asked. Instinctively, I raised my fingers to my face, and pushed against the skin under my eyes. It was wet and smooth. I pulled the sleeve of my shirt down, and raised it once more to dry the dampness. I hadn't realized that I was crying. I looked back up at Matilda, and sighed.

"No, everything is not okay. My boyfriend promised me something really important, and decided to change his mind last night. He's the only one I know that can-" I stopped myself mid-sentence. I stared at the vampire in front of me, and almost saw the light bulb above my head go off. So, Edward refused to change me. Chances are, that meant Carlisle and Alice were out of the question as well. The topaz in Matilda's eyes resembled that of Carlisle's. This may work.

"Matilda, how much control do you have when it comes to human blood?" She smiled.

"Oh, I'm very well behaved. Why do you ask?"

"I have a pretty big favor to ask of you."

* * *

**Edward.**

I didn't think it was possible for me to feel this horrible about anything. But Bella proved me wrong. I hated myself for hurting her, but why couldn't she see that it's for her own good? She has some kind of idea in her head that the only way to be with me is to give up her soul. But I wouldn't let that happen. She was too precious to become a monster.

It had been exactly three hours since she had run away from me. I cannot get it out of my head. Her face .. so hurt and confused as she turned around to run. She was running from me. I had caused this. It was entirely my fault. She had to hate me right now. I don't see any way for her to look at me. So, I was giving her space. When she was ready, she'd return to me. Alice would see if she was in trouble.

The leather on my couch was doused heavily in Bella's scent. I turned my head, and let my nose touch against the material. I inhaled sharply, and her sweet aroma filled my nostrils. I smiled softly, and turned my head around again. My eyes landed on the small bag of clothes she had left on the floor next to the bed. I sighed, and let my eyelids close, trying to block out everything but Bella's scent.

_Edward, get down here now. Bella's in trouble._ My eyes snapped open immediately. I jumped off of the couch, and glided down the staircase with my increased vampire speed. Alice met me at the bottom. I grabbed her shoulder roughly.

"What did you see?" I demanded. She frowned, and her vision filled my head. Bella in a meadow, with a female. A vampire. I didn't stick around for the rest, as I sprinted out the front door. I don't think I had ever run this fast in my life. It would be my fault. It would be my fault if my angel was injured. I made her run away. I didn't follow her. I had to save her.

As I neared the meadow, I smelt it. The smell that terrified me more than anything. The scent I was savoring just a few minutes ago. Her blood had been spilled. My Bella was injured. I felt the anger in me triple, as I jumped quickly into the meadow. The female vampire was gone, but she had left Bella's body. Quickly kneeling to her side, I studied her. Her chocolate brown eyes were wide as they stared up at me in shock. I frowned as my eyes scanned the rest of her body. They stopped when they reached her wrist.

Covered in blood, was a deep crimson mark that resembled a crescent moon. Everything in my brain stopped. Time had stopped. I couldn't make sense of anything else.

Bella had been bitten.


	4. Leaving

**Edward.**

I didn't waste any time in scooping Bella's fragile body up into my arms. I immediately cringed at her scent. That beautiful, flowery, delicious freesia scent of hers was now heavily tinted with venom. I was frantic as I sped back to the house. I could almost hear the poison seeping through her veins, destroying every inch of humanity she had. I gulped down my anger, and focused on getting back to Carlisle. Surely, there had to be time. I could suck out the venom just like at the ballet studio. There just _had_ to be time.

_Carlisle has got everything prepared upstairs for Bella. _Alice's thoughts were loud, and I could hear the worry that strained them. She met me at the front door, holding it open for me so I could keep my pace. I entered the house, blocking out the rest of my family's thoughts as I kept running up the long staircase, until I reached my room. Carlisle was standing patiently next to the gold bed, his medical instruments laid neatly on the dresser next to it. I gently set her down, and snapped my head up to meet my father's gaze.

"Do I have time?" I seethed between gritted teeth. Carlisle lowered his head to Bella's wrist, and I stiffened on instinct. _This isn't good._ I stood immediately, dropping Bella's cold hand. My eyes narrowed at him, and he sighed softly as he looked up at me. I could see the disappointment on his face. I swallowed hard.

"I'm sorry, Edward. The transformation has already begun," he announced in shame. _Please, try to calm yourself, son. There's nothing we can do._ I growled loudly, making Carlisle jump. I snarled, and stomped to the door in anger. _Where are you going?_ I laughed bitterly.

"I'm going to destroy the wench that did this to my Bella," I snapped. I ignored Carlisle's pleas for me to return as I raced down the staircase. My hard fingers were curled into tight fists as I headed for the door. I was going to find this vampire, rips her limb from limb, and spit on her remains as I burn her to her death. I was going to avenge Bella's "death." A new emotion hit me suddenly, and I turned to see Jasper. I snarled, shaking my head.

"This wasn't supposed to happen!" I yelled. Jasper nodded understandingly, and lowered his head. I felt a twinge of guilt. I knew my anger was effecting him just as much as it was myself. I turned around, and made a break for the door once more. _Edward, there's something you should know._ I stopped again, closing my eyes in frustration. Could they not see what was happening here? Bella's life was over. Why couldn't they realize how this was affecting me, and let me leave?

"Alice, I don't have the time-"

"The vampire that bit Bella, her name is Matilda. She's 214 years old, and she's from a vegetarian coven in California," Alice stated. My anger only built at the sound of her name. I laughed, sarcasm coating the bitter sound. Alice looked nervous as she clung to Jasper. She was biting her bottom lip, watching me cautiously. I took a step toward them, and Jasper stiffened. _Back off, Edward. Just listen to Alice._

"What does that have to do with_ anything_?" I huffed, trying to keep my voice calm. From upstairs, Bella's screams had begun. My non-existent heart fell to my knees, and I whimpered at the sound. For the next three days, Bella was going to be in an immense amount of excruciating pain. And it was all my fault. I didn't go after her. I let her roam the forest on her own. I didn't protect her.

"Edward, I don't think it'd be wise to hunt Matilda," she said. I growled loudly at her again, and Jasper stepped forward, baring his teeth at me. Alice sighed, and stepped away from him. She raised her hand to her face, and her palm covered her mouth for just a few seconds. She was blocking her thoughts from me, and if she were human, she probably would've vomited by now. I watched her movements. Her eyes were pained as she listened to Bella's tormented shouts from upstairs. She snapped her eyes back toward me, and took an unneeded breath.

"Bella asked Matilda to bite her. She _begged_ her."

I'm sure the horror on my face didn't do any justice to how I really felt. This wasn't right. Alice was mistaken. Bella wouldn't do that to me. She wouldn't go against my word and do something like this. I knew Alice wouldn't lie to me, but this was just one big misunderstanding. Alice had seen it the wrong way.

"I'm not mistaken, Edward. After you left, I saw it. Bella got on her knees, and begged her. She promised Matilda that none of us would go after her," she said. She dropped her head in disappointment. Everything began to spin once more. The anger that I was carrying seconds ago was now dissolving, but wasn't leaving me completely. My anger and fury at Matilda had lifted, but found a new occupant. Bella. I never once thought it'd be possible to feel angry at her, but she proved me wrong yet again. Bella let out another painful shriek, and I winced.

"Don't be angry, Edward. She was upset. This was what she wanted." I couldn't hear who the words had came from, but at this point, it didn't matter. Nothing mattered. Bella was upstairs, turning into a monster, and it _her_ fault. Bella's fault. The words clashed horribly together. Nothing had ever been her fault. She was perfect, and I was convinced that nothing could change that. But now ..

"I have to get out of here," I muttered, heading back upstairs. I could hear Alice and Jasper gasp loudly, and their footsteps were close behind mine. They followed me into my room, where I had kneeled by Bella's side, gripping her hand tightly. Her body was jerking violently, and Carlisle watched with saddened eyes as I brought her limp hand to my lips. I pressed them against her skin, and frowned. Her body temperature was already changing. The once pleasant warm feeling was already now a dull cool feeling. I stood up straight, and walked to my closet, where I pulled out a suitcase. I could hear Carlisle's gasp as well.

"Edward, what are you doing?"

"Leaving," I retorted. I yanked open my dressers, and hurriedly began throwing clothes inside. _You bastard!_ I turned to look at Alice. She was fuming, her once excited face twisted into anger. She stepped forward, and jabbed a hard finger into my chest.

"She did this for you, and you're leaving her? You're the first person she's going to want to see when she wakes up!" she spat, keeping her voice down. I threw another agonized look at the trembling Bella on the bed. I couldn't do it. I shook my head.

"I can't stay here and watch her turn into a monster. I listen to her screams, I can't watch her face, I just can't," I muttered, as I continued to pack. Carlisle took a step forward, sighing loudly.

"I don't think this is a good idea, Edward. What about Esme-"

"I'll come back .. eventually. I just .. I have to get away for awhile." I zipped up my bag, and pulled it to my side. I returned to Bella's side, and let my eyes linger on her face. Lowering my head, I let my lips brush softly against her cold cheeks. The pain of seeing her like this was unbearable, and if I were able to, I know I'd be shedding tears. I leaned closer to ear.

"Until we meet again, my love," I whispered. She twisted her head and moaned in pain, and I stood upright. I sighed, as I exited the room, and descended the staircase. I knew the other three were following me. I stopped when I reached the front door. I turned to Alice.

"When Bella awakens, let her know that I love her, will you?" I asked. She shook her head in shame. I noticed her eyes were now black, but I knew that she wasn't thirsty. She was angry at me.

"Not a chance in hell," she spat at me. She turned on her heel, and scaled the staircase. I sighed, and returned my attention to Jasper and Carlisle.

"Give my goodbyes to Esme, Em, and Rose," I mumbled. I couldn't catch their stares. I knew they were just as upset with me as Alice was. I felt guilt run through me, and for a second, I thought it was Jasper's doing. But I knew this was all on me. Maybe leaving was the wrong thing to do. Maybe I'll regret it, but I had to do it. Just like I had to leave when I first stumbled upon my angel. This was necessary.

"You don't have to do this," Carlisle said, but his voice was pleading for me to stay. I shook my head, and closed my eyes as another one of Bella's shrieks filled the house. I turned back to the two golden haired vampires before me, and nodded my head.

"Yes, I do." And with that, I was gone.


	5. Broken

**Bella.**

Days, months, years? Time wasn't anything I was grasping at the moment. The knowledge of just how long I have been writhing in my own agony wasn't in my possession. But I couldn't focus on that. The only thing that I had the strength to observe, to_ feel_, is the excruciating torture that was my transformation. I could feel the blood leaving my body. Slowly, but disingrating by the second. The fire that I had mentally prepared for wasn't anything like I had predicted. The stories and explanations I had been given by Carlisle and Edward seemed like fairy-tales compared to this.

"She doesn't deserve this."

My body twitched excitedly at the sound of a voice. My hearing, which had been disabled due to the ferocious flames that engulfed my ears, was returning to me. The sounds of heavy footsteps could be heard, along with slow breathing. I was beginning to pick up things that humans would have neglected to hear. Everything was becoming so loud. But despite the eagerness to listen to everything around me, there was only one thing I wanted to fill my ears right now. And that would be the deep, velvet, comforting voice of my Edward.

"She'll be waking up in three minutes. Please call Emmett, Rose and Jasper up here. I can see that she won't take this easy," I heard Alice announce._ Alice!_ Oh how wonderful her voice sounded after these past three days! As she predicted, the pain was dissolving quickly. It was lingering in my chest, where I could still feel, and even hear my heart thumping wildly against my ribcage. A warm hand touched my fingers, and I immediately melted with joy. But these fingers did not belong to my love .. they were bony, and I could feel the texture of the nail polish that was neatly painted upon the fingernails. I frowned.

"Rose won't come. Bella's not her favorite vampire at the moment." If I weren't so happy to be waking up, the comment probably would've hurt my feelings. But I was about to open my eyes. I was about to see Edward, embrace him, kiss him, and begin our eternity together. How could anything destroy the contentness and happiness that was quickly taking the place of my dying heart?

Speaking of my heart, the thumping had increased. My entire body shook with a tremble as it rumbled rapidly in my chest. This was it. The last trace of humanity was about to leave my body. I would be an "official" Cullen in just seconds. I couldn't help but shiver as my breath left my lips. I was breathing heavy, trying to gasp in oxygen as my throat suddenly felt dry. A hand gripped my fingers again, and I had prayed it was Edward's, but I felt the same smooth texture of nail polish. I didn't think it was possible for me to feel any disappointment right now, but I did. Where was Edward? Why wasn't_ he _caressing my hand? Why wasn't I hearing _his _magical voice?

I gasped as the rhythm of my heart raced faster, if that was even possible. I arched my back, and felt my toes curl in sudden pain. Faster, faster, the thumping continued to speed up. My fingers curled into fists as I instinctively tried to pound at my chest. I felt warm hands holding my wrists down onto the bed beside my waist. I screamed loudly, but instantly regretted it, for the rawness of my throat had returned as well. I gulped, trying to moisten it, but my mouth was dry. My heart was pushing harder now against my ribs, and I could almost hear the bones rattling from under my skin. Faster, _faster_.

And then it stopped.

My fingers and toes relaxed themselves, and the pain quickly scampered from my body. My mouth was dry, but it was over. After three days of endless suffering, screaming and hurting .. it was done. I inhaled a sharp breath, and winced as the chilly air entered my shriveled throat. I listened for voices, but it was surprisingly quiet, with the exception of the loud gusts of wind that blew forcefully against the window from outside.

"Open your eyes, Bella," a loud, but musical voice cooed to me softly. I followed their instructions, and let my eyelids flutter open. I gasped. As I stared at the ceiling, I could make out every spec of dust, every dent and chip that had damaged the texture. I turned my head, facing the person that was grasping my hand tightly. I was met with the familiar concerned gaze of my new sister, Alice. She smiled at me, but with my new vampire sight, I caught the flash of sadness that illuminated it. I frowned, but continued to stare at her. If I had thought she was gorgeous as a human, well .. I don't think there was a word for what she could be described as now. I smiled at her, but she didn't return it. I opened my mouth to greet her, when I heard someone quietly clear their throat. I lifted my head, and saw Emmett and Jasper standing by the door, grinning at me. I turned to the left, and saw Carlisle standing by the bed, Esme behind him with her head on his shoulder. The corners of mouth fell. I opened it once more, but only one name escaped my dry throat.

"E-Edward?"

I could see the shame that crossed every single one of their faces. It was the exact shame that had been there at my birthday party, when Jasper had tried to attack me. It was the same shame that they had when we had returned from Italy, as they pleaded with me to forgive them for leaving. Something was wrong. Terribly, terribly wrong. And the fact that Edward wasn't sitting beside me sent a panicked jolt through my body. Alice grimaced as she stared at my face, and that right there gave me my answer. Something had happened to him. Someone had hurt him. The possibility of my love being .. No, I couldn't even think of that.

"Is he hurt? Where he is?" I demanded hoarsely, now ignoring my protesting throat. I felt a wave of calmness spread over me, and I cringed in anger. Jasper took a step back, and sighed apologetically. Alice's fingers held mine tighter, and I returned the favor. She winced, and I immediately lightened my grip, forgetting that my strength exceeded hers as a newborn.

"Bella, Edward .. left," she explained, the volume of her voice set to a whisper. But I could hear every word as if she were screaming directly into my ear. And every word sent a hit of emptiness to my chest.

"What happened? Where did he go?" I panicked, sitting up and leaning closer to Alice. She bit her lip, and adverted her eyes to the gold comforter that was sprawled across the bed. Carlisle took a step forward, and I looked at him hopefully. His face was just as pained as Alice's.

"He's perfectly fine. But he .. he had to leave for awhile. Your transformation .. your insubordination to his decision to keep you human was too much for him. He didn't want to stay here."

_He didn't want to stay here. He's angry at me. He didn't want to stay with me._

"He'll return with time. He's just taking a small break from Forks," Carlisle added gently. _Taking a small break from me. He doesn't want me anymore. _Alice's grip tightened, and I stared at her wild eyes. She was murmuring something, but I couldn't hear it. I could give her the attention to know what she was telling me. All I knew was that Edward was gone. He had left me .. again. He promised he wouldn't. Her hand reached up to my face, and she gripped my chin with her warm fingers. She pulled my face to hers.

"Bella, listen to me, things will get better. Please don't-" I pulled away from her grasp, and jumped to my feet. The pain of the transformation was miniscule compared to what I was feeling now. The contentness and happiness that had covered my heart, was now being replaced by emptiness and pain. This entire transformation was for Edward. I did it so that we could be together for the rest of forever. But now, my reason for eternal damnation was gone, and I was here, to live in this pain for the rest of my existence.

I quickly made a run for the door, but Emmett and Jasper grabbed my shoulders roughly. Their arms slithered around my body, holding me tightly. I cringed, and pushed as hard as I could. I heard Jasper whimper loudly in pain as I shoved my hard shoulder into his side. He dropped his arm, and I scrambled out of Emmett's lightened hold, down the stairs and out the back door. Before I knew what was happening, I was in the forest. This new speed was exhilarating. It wasn't until now that I realized why vampires never hit anything as they ran. To a human, the run would cause their vision to blur, as everything whirled past them. But as I ran, everything was visible. I could see every blade of grass, every piece of bark on a tree, _everything_.

I stopped when a sweet aroma filled my nostrils. I whipped my head around, and sniffed as the mouth-watering scent lingered in the air. Something inside of me pulled towards the trees, where I witnessed a buck sniffing at something hidden on the forest floor. The monster that had just been born inside of me launched forward. The buck barely had time to react as my strong hands snapped his neck, and I lowered my mouth. I hungrily ripped at the fur and flesh, and let the warm crimson liquid flow down my throat. As I finished, I pushed the dead animal away from me with wide eyes. I was trembling as I stepped backwards away from it's corpse. I stumbled back, and allowed myself to fall on the ground.

Warm arms constricted around my body, and I immediately dug my face into Alice's body, sobbing into her shoulder. Though I produced no tears, I let the choked sounds rip throat my throat. She rubbed my back soothingly, but it didn't help the pain. I cried out, grabbing onto Alice for support. Her hand flew to my hair, where she stroked it in a feeble attempt to calm me down.

"It hurts, Alice," I mumbled miserably. She held me tighter in her arms, and shifted so that she was sitting next to me. She rocked us back and fourth as I continued to dry-sob into her shoulder.

"I know it does, sweetie," she whispered into my ear as her fingers softly untangled my hair. We sat like this for what seemed like hours. We sat in silence. She held me in her arms, and I clung to her for dear life, afraid that if I let go, she'd disappear just like Edward. She held me while I cried. I cried for Edward, I cried for that poor buck that I just murdered, but mostly, I cried for my future. It was now broken, as was I.

**Hey guys, I just wanted to say thanks for the reviews. I appreciate them! Keep it up! :**


	6. Sadness

**Bella.**

Gone. _Gone_. **Gone**. Edward was gone.

This simple fact was what kept me rolled into a ball on the corner of the familiar leather couch. But what kept my head throbbing, and non-existent heart hurting, was the fact that it was my fault. I was the reason he had left his home and his family. And though I had listened to Alice and Esme assure me that he still loved me, and was just taking care of some business, I couldn't ignore the voice in my head that was screaming '_He doesn't want you anymore'_. If he didn't, it would make sense. Maybe his reason for keeping me human was because he wouldn't love me the same way. Maybe it was my beating heart, my blushing cheeks or my hypnotizing scent that kept him around. And now that all of those traits are dead, so was our love.

I shifted, letting my nose brush against the hard texture of the black leather I was resting upon. I inhaled sharply, and let his amazing cologne linger in my nostrils. It was the closest thing to him that I had to live off of right now. I heard footsteps thump loudly against the hardwood floors next to the door, before it creaked open slowly. I didn't bother looking up, I had grown familiar to Alice's scent these past few hours.

"I should help you clean up, Bella. No offense, but you're a mess," she taunted jokingly. I pulled myself up into a sitting position, and glanced down at my appearance. My pajamas were now ripped and hanging in tatters on my body. Dirt and blood caked the front of my tank top. I winced, and looked up at her, nodding weakly. She gave me a soft smile, and stride gracefully to my side. She took my hand, and lead me to the bathroom. She helped me strip myself of my clothes, before giving me a soft nudge into the shower. I watched as she exited, closing the door behind her. I took a breath, and leaned down, turning the water on.

It was surprisingly freezing, and if I were human, it probably would've made me scream. But the cold water mixed comfortably with the temperature of my body now. I stepped closer, letting the soft beads run down my body. I massaged my hair, getting it moist, before reaching for the first bottle of shampoo I could find. I popped open the bottle, and was hit immediately with a strange scent. I let the bottle drop nosily to the shower floor as I realized this was Edward's shampoo. I stared down at it, as it sloshed back and fourth as the water touched it. Shakily, I leaned down and grasped it. I distributed some into my hand, and worked my fingers through my hair, making sure every inch of my scalp was touched. After rinsing off my body with the shampoo as well, I stepped out. I wrapped a towel around my dripping body, and turned to grab the doorknob, when I saw myself pass through the mirror. I stopped. Back-stepping, I stared at my own reflection.

This wasn't the me that I remembered. My once chocolate brown eyes were replaced with a dark shade of crimson. My skin, which was always pale, had been whitened immensely. Though my hair hung over my shoulder in wet ringlets, I could see that the mahogany color had been brightened to a soft brown. Every wrinkle, every pimple or zit, every flaw that my face had carried had been diminished. I don't consider this to be quite as gorgeous as the rest of my family, but I was pretty. I jumped at the sound of a sharp knock at the door.

"Are you finished yet, Bella?" Alice's worried voice asked. I took a breath out of habit, and pushed the door open. Alice led me back to Edward's bedroom, where some clothes were neatly laid out on the bed. For a second, Alice's devotion to designer clothing had me scared, but when I noticed a pair of gray oversized sweatpants, I immediately felt relief. After putting on the undergarments, I pulled on the pants. I turned to find Alice rummaging through Edward's closet. I frowned.

"Alice, what are you-"

"I thought you might feel more comfortable wearing this right now. I know how much this is hurting you," she mumbled. She extended a shirt to me, and I took it, watching her wary eyes. I glanced down, and felt my insides melt. It was a black long-sleeved button down shirt. I smelt it first, before quickly realizing, this was Edward's shirt. I looked back up at Alice, who smiled sadly at me. I hurriedly slid my arms through the sleeves, and fumbled with my fingers to get the buttons done, before locking my arms around Alice's neck. She stiffened, and melted into my grasp, wrapping her arms around my torso. She pulled away after a moment, and gave me another soft smile before heading for the door. I let myself fall back onto the couch, inhaling his scent again.

"Alice!" I called. She appeared at the door again with a silver object that I assumed to be her phone clutched tightly in her left hand. I frowned as I stared up at her, trying not to let the sobs get to me once more.

"Do you see this getting any better?" I asked, my voice breaking and my body trembling. It had only been a few hours, but I was already a mess. How could I hold myself together until he returns? How could I hold myself together if he _doesn't_ return? There are a lot of brunette, brown-eyed human girls out there. What if some other girl's blood sung to him?

"To be honest, I can't see much of anything right now. But you've got your family to help you. We all love you, Bella," she said, and I nodded. I didn't wait for her to leave, as I curled myself up into the same ball as earlier. I heard her sigh softly, before her footsteps began to fade away, and I was left with the haunting silence once again.

**Edward.**

My phone was vibrating against my thigh, but I didn't lift a finger to answer it. This was the fifth call today, and I could only guess that it was Alice. All of the others, with the exception of Rosalie, had tried to reach me earlier today from their own phones. It was as if I could read their minds though I had left the continent. They were angry, thought I was being childish, and wanted me to know that Bella is hurting. Though the idea of my angel in pain left my insides to crumble, I was in a heavy amount of pain as well.

Bella's life is destroyed. Or .. _was_ destroyed. Why did she see what this meant? She's not able to have children, start a family, pursue a career, and grow old, like every human's life should be. She was going to be stuck on this forsaken planet until some kind of catastrophe wipes us out like the dinosaurs. She didn't realize that she would be forced to base her existence off of blood- the very thing that repulsed her most. She didn't realize how frustrating it would become to be around humans, to constantly hold your desire to break their necks. She didn't realize that sooner or later, she would become weary of this curse. She would hate it. She would regret it, and she would hold a grudge upon herself because she_ chose _this.

The vibration stopped after a moments, and a sharp bell rung throughout this small London apartment. I sighed, digging my fingers into my pocket for my phone. I flipped it open, glancing at the screen that read 'New voicemail'. I stared at the number, and my assumptions earlier were confirmed as I recognized it to be Alice's. I debated closing it, and throwing the phone out the window, but something was telling me to listen. So I pressed the phone against my ear, and let Alice's comfortable voice take over.

_"Since you didn't have enough decency to answer, I hope you have enough to listen to this entire message, instead of being a coward and deleting it. In all of my time spent as a vampire, I have never really felt any other emotion besides happiness. That is, until Bella popped into our lives. I found myself harboring new feelings of worry for this little human, which is something I never had to do before. Even when we found her in the ballet studio after James attacked, I didn't feel upset because I had seen that she was going to get better. I've never felt any emotion of sadness, but after she woke up, the second she realized you were gone, it was as if somebody rebuilt my heart, and then smashed it with a hammer. And since then, all I have felt is this agonizing sadness. I felt it when I watched Bella run away from us, I felt it when she sat on the forest floor holding onto me for dear life as she sobbed, and I feel it every time I see her curled into your couch, trying to inhale your stupid scent. You've really done it this time, Edward. This was the one time she needed you the most, the one time she needed you more than anybody in the world, and you left her. She's broken. She's a mess, and the future doesn't look much brighter right now. I just had to let you know the damage you have done. I know you probably just sit in silence all day, but frankly, you don't deserve that. You deserve to know what you've done, and have the guilt eat away at you until you finally come to your senses and get back here. And I didn't send you this message for you to come running home, because I know you won't. I just hope you'll realize what a mess you've left here. I hope to see you in the future. Take care of yourself, Edward." _Click.

The phone remained at my ear, as I sat stunned at her words. My body was trembling as I loosened my grip on the small object, letting it fall to the ground and break into small pieces. I didn't bother to pick it up. My eyes were wide as I rose from my spot on the floor. _She's broken._ Alice's words cut right through me like a knife. I felt pain spread throughout every inch of my body, as if I was being lit on fire. Bella was broken, she was hurting, she was sobbing .. for me.

I took a deep breath, and leaned my forehead against the cool wall in front of me. My fingers curled into tight fists, and I raised my arm. I wanted to cry, I wanted to shed tears and cry for my Bella. My beautiful, **vampire** Bella. I took another breath, before lowering my arm and slamming it into the wall forcefully.


	7. Seeing Them Everywhere

**Bella.**

The house was strangely quiet. It had been like this for hours now. Usually with my new, improved supersonic hearing, I was left with the chatter of the six vampires that busied themselves downstairs. They lived their lives like nothing had happened. Like nobody from the family had left. I seethed with jealousy. I wished more than anything that I could get up off of this couch, march downstairs and join their conversations. But I couldn't. I couldn't even bring myself to hunt. These past two weeks, Emmett and Jasper had been force feeding me; dragging me into the forest against my will and literally shoving the broken necks of the animals to my lips. I knew this was an act, for they had to continue attending school, and Carlisle had to continue his job at the hospital, otherwise it would raise suspicious about my disappearance. Alice had explained that Edward's absence caused some controversy, but they cleared it up with a statement about how he was too upset about my "death" to stay in Forks, so he left to stay with some family in Alaska. They were trying to set everything right, and I loved them dearly for that, but nothing could fix this. The only person that _could_ fix this didn't want me.

I sighed loudly, and rose from the couch. I tip-toed to the closed door, and pressed my ear against it, hoping to hear some kind of noise from downstairs. Nothing. I frowned. It was a Sunday afternoon. Where could they have all gone? Surely, they wouldn't have gone hunting without me. Panic was quickly growing within me. What if they got tired of me being depressed and left me here? The thought of them leaving me as well made me cry out. I quickly wrenched open the door, and cascaded down the staircase. The living room was empty. My bottom lip began quivering, and my fingers balled into fists. _You're pathetic, Swan. You chased away your only family._ The thought made another miserable sob rise from my throat.

"Bella? Are you okay?" a deep voice boomed from behind me. I whipped my head around, to see Emmett standing there, a gameboy in his left hand. I gasped, and without thinking, lunged at him. I wrapped my arms around his neck. I felt him tense, but his arms wound around my small body, overlapping themselves.

"I thought you all left me," I muttered into his shoulder. He laughed, and I pushed myself closer to him.

"We wouldn't ever leave you. Don't be stupid, Bella." He laughed again, stepped away from me, and let his hand move messily through the top of my hair. I grunted, and quickly fixed it. He sat down on the couch, still clutching the gameboy. I stood for a moment, but reluctantly sat down next to him. I cleared my throat.

"Where is everybody?"

He was silent, and I watched as his eyes quickly darted to me before they returned to his game. I frowned. Even as a vampire, I was still kept in the dark. My fisted fingers punched his forearm lightly, but he recoiled, dropping the gameboy onto the couch. He was rubbing his arm.

"Ow, Bella! Will you quit doing that?" he murmured, staring at me with wide-eyes. I had found that punching Emmett was quite a stress-reliever. Though sometimes I felt bad that I was actually hurting him, I knew I'd feel glad about it in the near future, when my incredulous strength would subside, and he'd go back to being obnoxiously strong once more.

"Where is everyone?" I repeated myself.

"Carlisle was called in at the hospital, Esme and Rose are hunting, and I don't have a clue where the hell Alice and Jasper are," he announced, picking up the gameboy off of the couch. I stared at him, waiting for him to sigh, and tell me the truth. I knew he was lying. He looked at me through the corner of his eye, and dropped the gameboy again. He quickly grabbed his forearm again, and I had to stifle my chuckle.

"Don't hit me again, Bella. Just nod your little head, and accept what I just told you, okay?"

I huffed, and crossed my arms over my chest. He laughed for a moment, and I waited for him to retrieve his gameboy again, but instead, he shifted closer to me.

"Bella, you need to get the idea out of your head that we're going to take off on you. Everybody in this family loves you. Hell, you _are _family. We are going to do everything in our power to help you with this. If you asked me to right now, I'd track down that jackass, and.." he stopped himself when he seen me wincing. "We're here for you, Bella. Please don't believe we'd ever leave you."

"Not _everybody_ loves me."

"Bella, of course he loves you. He-" I stopped him, holding my hand out.

"It wasn't him I was referring to." Emmett stared for a minute, before he inhaled and realized who I was speaking about. He sighed, and adjusted the baseball cap that sat on his head.

"Look, Rose is .. well, complicated. She's having a hard time swallowing the fact that you openly handed your humanity over to Matilda without thinking twice. She's bitter, and somewhat offended that you chose this, when none of us had that option," he explained. I felt the anger growing inside of me. The whole Rosalie situation was left untouched from before my transformation, but now I felt it resurfacing.

"_Why_ did I have to make my life decisions according to what _Rosalie_ wanted? Why was it up to her and Edward if I became a vampire? It wasn't! Which is why I asked Matilda to do it. I wanted to change. I was trying to not only please myself, but please the Volturi, and rid myself of being a big human burden. It was the only option I had that would make _everybody_ happy. It was the best option there was! Why am I being punished for it? Why does he hate me now? Why she does she hate me? Why can't anybody understand that this is _what I wanted_? It was my life, I had the right to decide!" I was unaware that I was screaming, but turned to see a stunned Emmett on the couch next to me. My nostrils flared when I smelt new scents in the room, and I turned to see Rosalie, Esme and Carlisle standing at the doorway. My hands were gripping the cushions of the couch so hard, that feathers were sputtering out of the holes that my nails had dug. Rosalie stepped forward.

"Bella-" she tried, but I stood.

"I'm sorry about the cushions, Esme," I mumbled, before ascending up the staircase, into Edward's room, and back onto that damned couch.

* * *

**Edward.**

Stepping out onto the busy street, I realized what a huge mistake I had made. I should've stayed inside my apartment. The street was full of people. My thirst wasn't a problem, but _she _was. I saw her everywhere. Every time I turned my head, I would see long locks of mahogany hair, and my dead heart would jolt with hope that it was my Bella. But it never was. And I was glad it was never her, because I didn't deserve that. I didn't deserve for her to come looking for me, not after what I had done to her. Alice's voicemail still rung sharp in my head. I listened to it frequently; for it was my only way to feel that connection to my family.

As sad it was, it wasn't only Bella's face I was seeing. I had grown so attached to my family, that my remorse of leaving wasn't only for her. I often spotted a blonde haired man, and wished that it was Carlisle, or Jasper. I even spotted a Rosalie a few times. I wanted more than anything to return to my family. My now,_ complete _family. This was everything I had selfishly wanted, and I had ran away from it.

I jammed my hands into my jean pockets, and continued to walk. I scowled at the thoughts of female passerbyers, whose thoughts were always full of how _hot_ and _gorgeous_ I was. I never once looked up at them though. My eyes were only for Bella.

Deciding to ditch the busy street, I turned down a shady alleyway. It was about seven, so the sky was quickly darkening. I looked up as I walked, and spotted two figures huddled close together at the end of the alley. I listened to their thoughts. _1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7.._ I frowned, and whipped my head up in confusion. I listened for the other one. _A, B, C, D, E, F, G.._ My pace quickened. There was something weird going on. Not many humans counted and recited the alphabet in their head. My steps became faster, until I was reaching them. Their faces were hidden by shadows, but it was their scent that hit me like a ton of bricks. The small one stepped forward, and grinned. I saw the bright white of their teeth. I knew the scent, I knew who they were.

"Hello, Edward," Alice greeted.

**Sorry about how short is is! They really are a lot longer when I'm typing them, but I hope this'll last you until my next chapter, which will be very soon. Happy Halloween! **


	8. Joining The Family

**Bella.**

I was making an effort. It was half-hearted, but it was something. The majority of the days and nights were still spent locked up in Edward's room, but I would drift downstairs from time to time to make an appearance. Esme, Carlisle and Emmett were very pleased with my attempt to get better. I noticed the mood change in them immediately, and felt a small bit of contentness that I was at least more pleasant to be around. Of course, the absence of Edward was still extremely painful, and it didn't help that Alice had decided to disappear as well. It's been about a week since I've seen her. She and Jasper never returned home that quiet day that I had ruined Esme's cushions, which had already been replaced. She called me a few times a day to chat aimlessly. According to her, Jasper was feeling very distressed by all of the emotions in the house (and reassured me countless times that it was not my fault) and needed a small break away from Forks. I miss her terribly, but there was a difference between her absence and Edward's. I knew she was coming back to me.

I heard the clicking of the television from downstairs, before a rumble of applause erupted. Emmett's howling hoots disrupted the once calm volume of the household, and I winced. I pulled myself away from the couch, and my eyes glanced at the clock on the wall. 6:21. Might as well join Emmett for awhile before I felt the need to wallow in my own self-pity again. I straightened out my clothing, which consisted of jeans, and another one of Edward's button down t-shirts, and jogged downstairs. Emmett grinned at the sight of me, and patted the spot on the couch next to him.

"Where's Rosalie?" I asked, glancing at the television. I recognized that the uniforms the players were wearing belonged to the sport of football. I watched as a man dressed in white and orange ran down the green field. Emmett pulled his eyes away from the game, and sighed.

"Shopping with Esme. She says it's nice to visit the mall without Alice for a change. Much more relaxing."

I felt a pang of jealousy as I soaked in his words. Sure, I was more pleasant, but not enough to accompany them to the mall. Rosalie and I had spoken a few days ago, and she apologized for her behavior. Neither of us brought up anything from before my transformation, and for that, I was glad. I knew my anger was on edge lately, and it would take some stupid comment about my former life to make me explode like I did before. Still, we were civil and finally began to acknowledge each other's presence; I would've thought she'd be considerate enough to invite me on their outing.

_"A few things, Bella. One, you hate shopping. Two, you haven't been wearing anything that hasn't been worn by __him_. Three, you're a newborn vampire who hasn't succumbed the desire to feast on human beings. Stop being jealous, you idiot," Emmett joked. I immediately relaxed with his words. I guess I was being a tad bit ridiculous. I had never been this needy to anybody except Edward before. But now that he was gone, I was willing to cling to anybody that would have me,_ including _Rosalie.

"YES!" Emmett wailed loudly, standing up and throwing his arms out in victory from a goal in the game. I winced from the loudness of his tone, but even more at the shattered vase that now lay in pieces on the floor. I bit my lip to muffle my laughter, but he saw my lips turning at the corners. He groaned.

"Esme is going to _kill_ me!"

"Technically-" I began, but he huffed loudly. I smiled and shut my mouth immediately. He sighed dramatically, and took a step towards the kitchen. I placed my hand out in front of him.

"I'll clean it up. You sit here and watch the game. But keep your arms at your sides, okay? They're bigger than you think," I stated. He rolled his eyes at me, but gave me a grin. I turned my heel, avoiding the scattered glass and stepped into the kitchen. I walked past the counter and grabbed the broom and dustpan, when something caught my eye. I stopped, and picked up today's newspaper. The broom and dustpan fell out of my hands, and noisily clanked onto the tile floor. My breath came out in a sharp, loud gasp as I clutched the newspaper harder, eyeing the story on the front page.

'_Town mourns Swan's death_'

My eyes were wide as they scanned over the article. It talked about how I ran away from the Cullen's household after an argument with Edward, and was attacked by a wild animal. Of course, they didn't leave out the fact that Edward fled Forks, which just made this entire article harder to comprehend. I followed the Times New Roman script to where it ended, trailing to a caption of a large picture. I let out a choked cry when I saw the picture, and immediately dropped the paper to the floor. I slapped my hand over my mouth to quiet my sobs, and bent to my knees, closing my eyes to escape the image that was now in my head.

Charlie and Jacob hugging. They were holding each other tight, and Charlie's face was dug into Jake's shoulder. They were in pain. Because of _me_.

"Oh god," I sobbed, and slid to the linoleum floor. I felt warm hands on my shoulders. They grasped my tiny forearms, and pulled me up. I wrapped my arms around Emmett's torso, and found myself dry-sobbing once more.

"Edward .. Jasper .. Ch-Charlie and Jake! I've hurt them all. I'm- I'm-" I was mumbling into his chest, trying to form decent sentences. His hand was rubbing my back in soothing circles, and surprisingly, I felt myself calming down. His hands moved to my waist, and he hoisted me up. I opened my eyes and realized I was sitting on the countertop. I leaned my head back against the cupboards, and closed my eyes again. I missed sleeping so much. Though I did way too much of it as a human, it was a way to escape everything, and if there were ever a time I wish I could lay in a peaceful slumber, it was now.

I heard the front door open, and after a few seconds, it closed. Loud, quick footsteps tapped amongst the floor until I heard them right next to me. The scent changed, and I knew Emmett was no longer alone. A pair of unfamiliar arms wrapped around me, and I inhaled the scent. Rosalie?

I was hesitant at first, but I laid my head against her shoulder.

"Is that where you all were that day? My funeral?" I asked weakly, after a few minutes of comfortable silence. I opened my eyes, and looked at her topaz eyes. She gave me a small smile, and nodded. I felt dumb, but nodded back. I heard a feminine sigh from behind Rose, and turned to see Esme. She grinned at me, and I returned it, suddenly feeling better.

"How was your shopping trip?"

They exchanged glances, before grinning at me again. I suddenly felt nervous. I remembered this kind of nervousness. It was always after Alice returned home from the mall. I accumulated quite a lot of fancy, non-Bella clothes after that.

"Well, we did get you something-" Esme began, and I immediately groaned out of habit. I heard a booming laugh, and turned to see Emmett standing in the doorway. Carlisle was next to him, arms crossed over his chest as he leaned against the wall. I wondered what the special occasion was. Why did they all have to watch as I was forced to accept clothes that I'll never wear?

"Emmett, hush. And hey, I want that vase replaced," she scolded, before turning back to me. "We didn't get you clothing, dear. I think this is something you'll love. I'm hoping, actually."

"Alice didn't want us to give it to you until she was home, but I think we can make an exception," Rosalie said, grinning as she reached into her oversized designer handbag. I studied the faces of the vampires before me, suddenly suspicious. Bright, beaming smiles were placed on all four of their faces. I raised my eyebrow, and opened my mouth to interrogate, when Rosalie shoved a long, blue velvet box into my hand. I gasped, knowing that it was jewelry.

"Come on, I don't think-" I began.

"Just open it, Bella," Carlisle requested politely. I eyed him for a second, before turning my attention back to the damned blue box in my hand. If I didn't want to wear their expensive clothing, what gave them the idea that I'd want expensive jewelry? I winced as my fingers pried open the box. It opened, and I brought it closer to examine what was inside. I gasped, for what seemed to be the millionth time today.

If I could shed tears, I would be. Sitting neatly inside the velvet box, was a necklace. It's chain was long, and sterling silver. What had me so emotional, was the charm that was attached to the chain. It was pewter, and in the shape of a heart. The overall heart was dark gray. A silver lion-like animal dominated the space. It sat perched on a small ribbon at the bottom that sheltered three dark gray shamrocks. Above the lion's head was a hand. I knew this image very well. It was the Cullen crest.

Each of the Cullen's wore some form of jewelry that carried the crest. Jasper, Emmett and Edward had black wrist cuff's that they wore. Esme wore a stunning bracelet. Carlisle had the crest on a large ring on his right hand. Alice wore her crest on a unique choker, and Rosalie wore a long necklace that held a large cameo of the crest. For the first time since my transformation, I felt happy. It was something that they did to represent their _family_. And they wanted me to be a part of it.

* * *

**Edward.**

"I'm going to hurt them!" Alice gasped loudly, startling both Jasper and I. We had been sitting in my cramped up apartment for about a week now, just relaxing. Alice and Jasper were both very careful with their thoughts. I hadn't seen Bella in a single one of them .. until now. The image filled my head of Esme helping Bella clasp a necklace around her neck. I didn't get a chance to see what was connected to the chain, but from the sounds of Alice's protests, it was something important. Alice's phone began to ring loudly. She had it to her ear within seconds.

"You will all be very sorry," she spoke evilly, slowing each word for dramatic effect. "I told you to wait until we got back!"

"She needed it. Did you not vision her picking up the newspaper? She saw a picture of her funeral. It was Charlie and Jacob. She completely lost it. It was the only thing I could think of to make her feel better," Emmett spoke from the other line. Jasper and I could both hear him as if he were sitting in the room with us. _I actually kind of miss the big doofus. _I looked at him, and nodded in agreement. Jasper and Alice had come to me for a "vacation", as she explained. I guess I had caused a huge mood shift in the climate around the house, and it was too much for Jasper. I didn't believe one word they said. If Jasper wanted to escape the upsetting and depressing emotions, my apartment would be the very last place he wanted to be.

"Guess I didn't see that," Alice mumbled. I tried to keep myself calm for Jasper's sake, but the idea of Bella _losing it _was driving me insane. It had been 24 days, almost 25 since I had last seen her, but it felt like much longer. Sure, I had lasted longer periods of time without her. But that before she was a vampire, and my desire to keep her safe and human was the only thing that kept me away. She was a vampire now. What the hell was my excuse?

I focused my attention to Alice as she grumbled a grumpy goodbye to Emmett, and pushed the small phone closed. I tried listening to her thoughts, but she was listing off fashion designers. I growled.

"Why should I tell you what's going on? It's not like you care," she snapped angrily at me. I snarled loudly, and quickly rose to my feet. Jasper moved quickly to the couch next to Alice. He couldn't help but he protective of her, even though he knew I'd never harm her. _Edward, please be calm._

"Of course I care! How could you even say that? Bella is my life!" I yelled, inhaling sharp breaths to calm myself down. She smirked. _Could've fooled me._

"I'm not fooling anybody, Alice," I hissed between my teeth. "Bella knows that I love her. And that's all I care about."

_No, she doesn't. And why should she? You left her when she needed you. How does that show love?_

I gasped, and my fingers curled into tight fists. Alice noticed my anger, but continued.

"Why was leaving necessary, Edward? Who is it helping? All you do is sit here and swim in your own remorse and guilt of what happened to Bella. All she does is sit at home and sob over you leaving. You being on a different continent isn't helping anybody! I always thought you were so smart, but why can't you see that? You can't change what happened, and neither can she. What's done is done, so why the hell are you still here?"

I closed my eyes, and sunk to the floor. I was shaking in anger, but it wasn't directed towards Alice. It was towards myself. Everything she had sad was right. I gulped, and opened my eyes to look at her. She was smiling, leaning back against the couch with her arms crossed over her chest. Suddenly, her reason for the London vacation was quite clear. She sat forward, and her eyes burned into mine.

"So, what do we do now?" she asked me, never breaking her gaze. I sighed, and closed my eyes once more, before answering her.

"We buy tickets for the first flight back to Forks."

* * *

**I couldn't keep him away any longer! But writing him back into Bella's life is going to be very drama filled & interesting! I'm getting excited just thinking about writing it, haha. Anyways, thanks for the reviews! I really appreciate them a lot!**


	9. Monsters

**Bella.**

In the beginning, when Edward would mention or refer to the_ monster _that was inside of him, I always bit back the urge to argue. I still have to deny that no part of him includes any trace of a monster, but for the first time, I knew what he was talking about. As I crouched down to my knees, and my eyes locked with the mountain lion that was perched lazily upon the boulder in front of me, I could feel my vampire senses kicking in.

This had been my first proper hunt since my transformation. I didn't want to count my first depressing kill of the buck, or the numerous amounts of deer that Jasper and Emmett forced down my throat. This was the first time I was making a proper effort to "eat". I heard rustling behind me, and I snapped my head back in a defensive gesture. I saw Emmett crouching behind a bush, grinning at me.

"Go for it, kid," he mumbled softly. I smiled, and turned my attention back to the over-sized feline in front of me. He laid peacefully on the boulder, his tongue lapping at the fur between his large paws. He was completely oblivious to my presence. I crept forward on instinct, my foot accidentally breaking a thin stick that was mixed with the ground. I cursed to myself quietly, and watched as he leapt from the rock, surveying his surroundings for a possible threat.

"Wait until his back is turned. He won't be able to put up as much of a fight," I heard Emmett whisper quickly. I nodded. I waited until the animal took a few steps forward. His head swung around, and I ducked back farther between the trees. He turned his focus to another part of the forest, and I felt everything fall into place. Without realizing it, I was lunging forward. Something inside of me was awakening, as I struggled to keep the large beast secure in place.

"His neck, Bella!"

Hearing his words, my hands flew to the lion's neck. I grasped it tightly, and without hardly any effort, heard a sickening _crack_ under my fingers. I immediately loosened my grip, and watched as the body fell limp in my arms. I gulped down the guilt. I had this pep talk with Carlisle before I left. He was worried that I would feel like this. And I hated to admit it, but I did. This mountain lion probably had cubs to protect. And who knows if Rosalie or Emmett hadn't already devoured them? I heard a loud sigh from behind me. Esme stepped beside Emmett.

"You're thirsty, Bella. Go ahead. I'm sure you've got this part down perfectly by now."

I couldn't help but to laugh lightly at her words. For the past two weeks, I had been allowing the boys to do the hunting for me, while I simply sunk my teeth into the flesh and drunk. It had been so _easy_. And guiltily, I was kind of starting to enjoy it. I opened my mouth to say something, but the pain in my throat was raw, and the scalding feeling was increasing by the second. I lowered my head, and without hesitation, sunk my teeth into the walls of fur and flesh.

I let the blood trickle down my throat, and sighed at the relief and pleasure of the soothing that came with it. The burning pain dulled immensely. With the back of my hand, I wiped my chin, trying to rid myself of any spilt drops of blood. Emmett laughed loudly.

"What do we do with the body?" I murmured, staring down at the lifeless corpse at my feet. Emmett was already scooping the dead mountain lion into his arms. I backed up to stand next to Esme as he placed it on the ground. He lowered himself, and his hands began pounding at the dirt. I was confused, but when dirt began to fly, I realized what he was doing. He was burying it. Hm, well, that made sense. Guess it _would_ get a bit suspicious if they just left the corpses all over the place.

He lowered the body into the deep hole, and within seconds, had the dirt piled back up. He grinned up at us as he clapped his hands together messily, brushing away the soil on his hands. Esme rolled her eyes.

"He could've done that a bit neater," she scolded, glaring at him. He laughed again. Another rustle was heard, and we all turned our heads to the left. Rosalie was entering the clearing, mumbling to somebody on her cell phone. When her eyes landed on me, her words quickened, and she closed the small phone.

"Who was that?" Emmett asked, as he draped his large arm around her shoulder. She smiled, and shrugged it off.

"Carlisle. He was just telling me that Alice and Jasper are back, and-"

"They're back?" I yelped. My outburst startled the three of them, but I couldn't help it. Excitement was building inside of my body, and the anxiousness of seeing Alice again was hardly bearable. They laughed at my behavior, but I didn't mind. Lately, things had been getting easier for me. After awakening and enduring the first few hours of vampirism without _him_, I thought the pain would never dissolve. The family was helping me, though. My family.

And things were getting better every single day.

"Shall we?" Esme asked, placing a hand on my shoulder. I grinned. Alice would be delighted by my progress! Even if she had already seen it in her visions, I'm sure seeing it with her own eyes will be much more rewarding. I nodded to them. They began to run, and I followed. Even for a newborn, I still wasn't as fast as I should be. Unfortunately, I don't see_ that _changing in the future. If I couldn't be clumsy, I was slow. It really wasn't fair.

The house came into view, and I noticed that Rosalie, Emmett and Esme had stopped, but I didn't. I was surprised with myself at how excited I was to see Alice, but I didn't let that slow me down. My legs kicked faster as I neared the front door. I could smell her wonderful scent now, mixed with Jasper's. I ripped open the front door, and opened my mouth to shout her name, when I smelt it.

Another scent. A scent that was strong, but not new. No, definitely not new. I had smelt this countless times before. This heavenly, over-powering cologne that I basked in when I curled up on the couch. My favorite scent in the world. _His scent_.

I skidded to a halt. I looked around, and noticed I was in the living room. I could hear heels clanking loudly against the tiles in the kitchen. They were coming closer. Alice's aroma swept over my senses, and before I knew it, I was being constricted by two, small but strong arms. I smiled against Alice's shoulders. She pulled away quickly, and immediately reached down to touch my new necklace.

"Do you like it?" she asked, her voice laced with hope. I couldn't help but grin at her. Rosalie and Esme had confessed that the entire thing was Alice's idea. She had drawn it out, and they had it custom made for me. It only made the necklace that more meaningful. She traced the outline of the heart-shaped charm with her pale finger, still examining it.

"I love it! Thank you so much!" I wrapped my arms around her once more, and she squealed in happiness. That's when I smelt it again. It was so strong now. So close, that every time I breathed, it made me dizzy. My hands balled up to fists as I dropped my arms from Alice's shoulders. She looked confused. She glanced behind me, and her face softened.

"Alice," I whispered, closing my eyes. I knew it was him. I felt her hand on my arm, and I snapped my eyes open. She nodded as she locked onto my gaze.

"Please turn around, Bella. Please," I heard a deep voice beg gently. I gasped at the sound of it. I had lived without that voice for far too long. As a human, his voice was my favorite sound in the entire world. As a vampire, it was .. beautiful. It was enchanting, enticing and inviting. My fingers unraveled themselves, and I turned my head slightly. I caught of a glimpse of his tall figure standing on the opposite side of the room.

"Turn around, Bella," Alice whispered, but her voice was demanding. She grasped my forearm, and twisted it so that my body followed suit. I gasped once more when my eyes landed on him. I didn't care if I didn't have a heart. Whatever took it's place was melting quickly, as I drank in his essence.

How many nights had I lay on that couch, wrapped up into a pathetic ball, daydreaming that this moment would happen? How many times had I closed my eyes and visioned his face? I thought for sure that even in my head, I had his face memorized perfectly. But now, as I stared wide-eyed at my flawless angel, I couldn't even fathom how I had survived off of just memories. I could see everything with so much more clarity. I saw every freckle, every contour of his face, every speck of topaz that blessed his beautiful eyes. I saw everything, and after 26 days of not seeing his face, it was like falling in love all over again.

He wore a similar expression to mine as his eyes studied me. I watched as his eyes glazed over mine, falling to my lips, and trailing down the rest of my body. _Disgusted._ He must hate the sight of me as a vampire. I was everything that he didn't want me to be, and he was probably listing my new flaws in his head. I closed my eyes, and took a step back.

"Please, Bella!" I opened my eyes, and he was standing closer. His hands were extended in front of him, like he was reaching for me. He took another step, and I became wary. _Do it. He's come back. Hug him. Kiss him. Enjoy him. This was what you wanted, _I kept telling myself. My body trembled as he took yet another step closer to me. I watched his eyes. He was taking slow, husky breaths, and I couldn't help but inhale the scent of his breath. It was another thing I had been deprived of.

I felt Alice's hand nudge me forward, and I stumbled closer to him. He stared down at me. I watched as he gulped, and raised a shaky hand to my face. I closed my eyes as his now warm hand touched my face. My heart was slowly piecing itself back together at just his touch. I melted into his palm. I remember this feeling. This feeling of perfect being perfectly content. It was the best feeling in the world, and I lived happily with it until .. he left.

I snapped my eyes open, startling him. I grasped his hand, and despite the electricity that coursed through my body, I yanked it away from my face. His eyes widened, and his jaw dropped. I wanted to grab him, hold him and assure him that it was okay. I wanted to assure him that I was okay, and we were okay.

But we weren't.

Still aware that the front door was wide open, I took a step on my heel and turned quickly. I moved so quickly out the front door that I wasn't aware I was running until the scenery turned into a vibrant green. I stopped suddenly, collapsing on my knees. I leaned forward, and pressed my cheek to the cold soil of the earth below me as my head swam with thoughts.

He was back. Why had I run? I knew I wanted him. I knew I still loved him. So why did his presence upset me?

_He'll leave you again. You're afraid. You don't trust him._

And I dug my claws into the soil as the realization sunk in. I didn't trust Edward.

* * *

**Edward.**

I hadn't moved. I hadn't blinked. I hadn't taken a single breath. I was paralyzed to the spot where I stood. My hand was still raised from where Bella had smacked it away. The feel of her fingers on my skin still tingled. I couldn't think of anything. Except her. My Bella.

Oh, my beautiful Bella. I didn't think it was even possible for her beauty to enhance, but somehow, it had. Every part of her took my breath away, even the frightening crimson eyes that were slowly fading. I had felt a surge of joy knowing that she had stuck to an animal diet, but I didn't expect anything more. Bella wouldn't subject herself to that. Well .. willingly, of course.

But for now, my focus was on other things. I was trying to soak in everything that had just happened. She had been right in front of me. I was so close, and .. she ran. She ran away from me. Just like before she had been bitten. The pain inside of me was building, and I felt myself slowly falling apart. I deserved it though. I deserved every second. And I wouldn't blame Bella at all if changed her mind about me. About _us_.

_Edward, I'm sorry. I didn't see it happening like that._

I glanced at Alice, unaware of the painful grimace on my face. She frowned, and stepped closer. I lowered my arm, feeling defeated. I shook my head, and closed my eyes. Suddenly, I wished I was back at the apartment in London.

_Just give her time. She wasn't expecting you to be here. She was excited for Alice's arrival._ I didn't look up at Esme, but her words stung. She was excited to see Alice and Jasper, but not me? Things had definitely changed, and I knew it was my fault.

I had destroyed everything.

I really _was_ a monster.

* * *

**Okay, I read your reviews, and I definitely agreed. I didn't want Bella to fall into his arms, and have them announce their love for eachother. I like the strong Bella I have created as well. So, I hope I did good with this. I wasn't going to do anything hasty, and have her hate him, because obviously, she doesn't. But I do agree that she needed to have some trust issues, so that's exactly what I did. I appreciate the reviews a lot. Tell me what you think! I always consider your input when I write the chapters. Thanks!**


	10. Obligation

**Before you begin this chapter, I would like to say something. I have been accused of plagiarizing my previous chapter '_Monsters_'. I've already spoken to the girl about it. It appears the chapter has been posted on another story. She hasn't been able to remember which story it was, but it would help me out a lot if you could all keep your eyes open for me. I am beyond angry that somebody would take my writing, and claim it as their own. But I promise you that everything I publish, is written by me. But if anybody finds the story with my work in it, will you please PM me and let me know? I would really appreciate it. Thanks! Now on to the chapter!**

* * *

**Edward.**

After standing completely frozen as a statue for ten minutes, and listening to the comforting, yet painful thoughts of my family, I went upstairs. I drifted throughout the familiar long hallway, inhaling the scents that I have forgotten for the past few weeks. I stopped when I reached my door. I noticed the change before my hand even reached the doorknob. When I pushed it open, and stepped inside, my suspicions were confirmed. This was not my room anymore. It was Bella's.

Though she hadn't moved anything, including the massive bed, I could feel the difference in the air. Nothing had been touched. Nothing was added, nothing was missing, but I felt like a stranger standing here. Her natural floral perfume was lingering in the air, making my head spin out of control. How I had lived a day without this amazing aroma was beyond me.

Turning around, I lowered myself onto the leather couch that was still pushed against the wall. Alice had informed me that Bella had spent most of her time in this room, on this very couch. I allowed my eyes to close, as I tried to get a grip of myself. I had never been this torn in my entire existence. These feelings of complete emptiness, anger and idiocy were all new to me. This whole situation was one that I had desperately tried to avoid, but instead, I pushed it into happening faster.

Soft footsteps were padding against the hardwood floors, but I didn't move from my spot. The footsteps stopped abruptly at the door. I listened to the steady breathing on the other side, and waited for whoever it was to enter. I didn't open my eyes when I heard the door creak open, and then click shut. But I opened them when I smelt her freesia scent.

She was standing awkwardly by the entrance of the room, hands at her sides. Her fingers were shaking nervously as her eyes studied me. I rose from the couch, not stepping forward. She was biting on her bottom lip, and I watched as she occasionally sucked it in, before jutting it back out. It was a nervous habit she had as a human.

I stayed silent, waiting for her to speak. It seemed that she was ready to speak to me, and I wasn't about to ruin it with my words. Her mouth opened once, and she took a breath as if getting ready to talk, but closed it suddenly. The silence was driving me insane. I closed my eyes once more, lowering my head. I heard her inhale another sharp breath, before her beautiful, musical voice was finally heard.

"How are you?"

I fought the urge to smile. I knew her head was probably swimming with ideas of what to say, but her tongue got the better of her. I opened my eyes, and raised my chin, chuckling once without humor.

"I've been better. How are you?"

"I honestly don't know," she mumbled, her eyes falling to the floor. I sighed, and she continued.

"There are so many things I want to say to you, so many things I want to ask you. But I guess I'll begin with .. why?" she asked, her voice breaking on the last word. I raised my eyebrows, and gulped down my confusion. I mentally agreed with her. We both had a lot of things that we most likely needed to say. Well, at least I know I had a lot to say. This prolonged conversation that should've taken place before she was bitten, had been intensified to the point where it would take _hours_ for us to express ourselves clearly. But I had time, and Bella deserved all of it.

"Pardon?"

"Why did you leave me? Why?" she demanded. Her voice was not the only thing that had grown cold with the question. Her black eyes narrowed, her pale arms crossed over her chest.

"I had to, Bella. You wouldn't understand," I answered softly, locking onto her bitter glare. Her nostrils flared, and I winced, bracing myself for her anger. She took a large step forward, her fingers curling into tight fists as they continued to shake at her side. Her breathing was heavy as she shifted her angry stare from the floor to my face, continuously.

"I wouldn't understand? I'm not an imbecile, Edward! But please, enlighten me on why I wouldn't understand!" she snarled. I was startled by her angry outburst, but I was even more startled by my own anger that was rising slowly. I tried to push it down. I shouldn't be angry. I shouldn't be angry at the love of my life, but for some reason .. I was.

"Fine," I snapped viciously. She winced, but I continued. "You wouldn't understand how it feels to have your wishes deliberately ignored and disobeyed. You wouldn't understand the pain I felt hearing you scream, knowing you were in agonizing pain. You wouldn't understand how horrible I feel knowing that your life is now gone. I couldn't stay here and deal with that!"

"Actually, I _do_ understand how it feels to have your wishes deliberately ignored, because my _only_ wish was to become a vampire, and you didn't care. You didn't want to give me the one thing I was asking for. I know my human life is gone, but god damnit, that's what I wanted! I wanted it more than anything in the world!" she bellowed. She was huffing, her chest rising and falling dramatically. I had to take my own deep breaths. My own anger surprised me, and I found that I was actually seething at her. I gritted my teeth together, trying to suppress the growl that threatened to escape.

"Want_ed_? Not want?"

She gulped, and her face fell a little, but she composed her angry stance, glaring at me once again.

"Yes," she argued loudly. "I _wanted_ to spend the rest of forever with you. But that dream went out the window when you left, and decided that you didn't want me anymore!" she screamed. I gasped in surprise, my body relaxing. My anger dropped, but didn't disappear completely.

"Of course I still want you!"

"Then why .. why punish me for giving us both what we want?"

"Because it wasn't just your decision to make!" I argued back. She laughed, throwing her head back as she howled without humor. She took another threatening step toward me, and her vicious attitude quickly returned.

"It my was my life. Not yours, not Rosalie's, mine. Who else had any say in the matter?"

"Me, and the rest of the family. We had just as much say in the decision as you did!" She shook her head, biting her lip once more. I noticed that her knuckles were more relaxed, and I silently hoped that we were closing this argument soon. I wanted compromise. I wanted to work everything out with her. Because despite both of our anger toward this situation, I knew our love was still just as strong. We couldn't go back and change what had happened, but we _could_ move forward and begin the rest of our immortal lives together.

"Yes, you did. And five out of seven voted yes! So, you had no right to go back on your word. I was only doing what I thought was the best solution. I was taking charge. What is the problem with that?" she snapped, her voice breaking once more. My mouth opened, and before I could think of a straight answer, I heard myself talking.

"The problem is that it's too complicated and dangerous for you to be here! And the problem is that my family and I were automatically obligated to take care of you!" I hissed angrily. But the second the words escaped my lips, I wished I could take them right back. I didn't mean to use the word obligated, and my only hope now was that Bella wasn't so observant as to recognize the word. But one look at her fallen face confirmed that she had.

"Obligated?" she asked. Her voice resembled that of a whisper. I reached a hand out, instinctively taking a step forward to make things better, but she jumped back. Her fists were unraveled, her fingers hanging limp at her sides once more. Her entire body trembled, including her bottom lip.

"Bella, I-"

"I know I hurt you by going against your word. I apologize for that. But you went against your word as well. And I- I didn't know that you felt this way about my vampirism. If you would've just _told_ me that you didn't want to deal with me as a newborn, I wouldn't have asked Matilda to bite me. If you would've told me that your feelings were going to change, I would've gladly stayed human. I was under the impression that it would be easier if I were a vampire, but ever since I made that god damned decision, I've been through hell. But you're not obligated to do anything, Edward. I will leave if it's a problem. I just don't want you to be unhappy," she rambled, her anger finally gone. I was shocked. My eyes were wide as I stared at her in complete astonishment.

"I don't want you to leave," I whispered, moving closer to her. For a few moments, it was silent. I was gazing at her, but her eyes were on the wall behind me. The tension between us was excruciating.

"What happened to us, Edward?" she whispered, her eyes softening, the black color diminishing greatly. I gulped, and moved closer to her again. To my relief, she didn't back away.

"We both made some pretty dumb decisions." She nodded in agreement, still not catching my gaze. I could hear movement from downstairs, and I knew my family was creeping toward the staircase. Our voices were so low that it had probably become harder for them to eavesdrop from their places down below. I knew Bella could hear them as well, because her eyes flickered to the door for a moment, before they returned to the wall.

"It's hard for me. It's going to take some time .."

"I understand. But please take into consideration that it's the same for me as well," I replied. The hurt was apparent on her face, but she straightened her shoulders, and lowered her head, nodding as it dropped.

"What happens now?"

I extended my arm, and grasped her hand. I marveled at the contact of her skin on mine. It was something I had missed very dearly. My thumb rubbed circles against her cool palm. She stared up at me in curiosity.

"We'll fix this, Bella. We're too strong to fall apart," I whispered. I dropped her hand, and took a deep breath, before stepping around her and exiting the room. I closed the door behind me, and was not surprised to see my family huddled up by the top of the staircase. I smiled softly at them. They were confused.

_What is going on, Edward?_

"I'll let you know when I figure it out myself."

* * *

**Bella.**

I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you.

They were the three words that I ached to announce so much. I had considered blurting them out several times during our little argument, but my pride always got in the way. The conversation, argument, disagreement .. whatever you'd call it, hadn't gone the way I had wanted.

I thought that by the time our words were spoken, I'd be in his arms. I'd be kissing his perfect lips, and molding myself into his perfect chest. I thought everything would be right again. Though he hadn't left in an angry rage, he hadn't left happily either.

And even after hearing him assure me that we'd be okay, I wasn't happy as well. I didn't feel as bitter, broken and betrayed as before, but I didn't feel complete either. To be honest, I didn't know what was going on. I didn't know where he was going when he left the room, but I knew that he wasn't going far. I glanced down at the ground, but my eyes caught on the shining gleam of the crest around my neck.

I raised my fingers, and touched it delicately. I was a part of this family. With or without Edward, I was figuratively a Cullen. I had a family. I had Edward back. Things should be better already.

But they weren't. Edward was right when he had said we had both made dumb decisions. I betrayed him, and he betrayed me. We were both just as bad. But he had come back, and I couldn't ignore the little voice in the back of my head. _He came back for you. _He had come back for me, to set things right. And what have I done?

Nothing. I've ran away, and screamed at him. I've done nothing but cry. This is something I would've expected of myself as a human. But I wasn't human anymore. I was a vampire. I was supposed to be sophisticated, beautiful, and strong._ I was supposed to be strong_.

It's about time I started acting like it.

* * *

**There you go! It seems like half of you are split up into Team Edward, and the other Team Bella, haha. As fun as that seems, I don't plan on turning this story into a full-blown hate fest. But I'm not going to make this easy for the lovely couple either. Like always, tell me what you think! And thank you so much for the reviews! **


	11. Death Magnet

**Edward.**

My eyelids instinctively closed as my fingertips fluttered gracefully amongst the piano keys. The melody was new to me, stirring inside of my head as I allowed it to project through my fingers. It reminded me greatly of Bella's lullaby, but it was different. It was more .. powerful, more demanding.

I frowned immediately. Her lullaby didn't need to be remixed because of our issues at the moment. The composition was supposed to reflect on how beautiful she was to me, and pounding heavy notes into wasn't going to help resolve our problems in the slightest. I sighed, and pounded both hands on the keys, causing a loud mixture of keys to clash loudly. I kept my eyes closed, before lowering my head and resting my forehead softly against the frame of the grand piano.

Bella's vampirism was probably the single most astonishing thing I have ever witnessed in my life. As a newborn, she wasn't incredibly blood-thirsty. She managed to keep her hunting habits scheduled around the same time as the rest of the family. She lived in this house without causing an uproar. She was content, and she was perfect. She was amazing, just as she always has been.

But this was terribly hard for me. Even now, sitting in this room, knowing that Bella was just upstairs was unbearable. This wasn't us. This distance certainly wasn't comfortable, and I knew she felt the same way. We had always been so_ together_, so complete. This wasn't normal, nor was it right. We belonged together, now more than ever.

But I was so torn, so confused, that I didn't know how to fix things. Every normal, healthy relationship has it's complications, I knew that. But what Bella and I share is far from normalcy. In my opinion, my love for her withstands any kind of love known to man. The proof? She was here, right now. If my feelings for her weren't so extraordinary, she would've been dead quite some time ago.

Sighing once more, I raised my head. I rose from my spot at the bench, and crept quietly out of the room. I heard laughter, and my stomach swelled immediately. _Her laughter_. It was still the most beautiful sound in the world, and just hearing it brought a smile to my face. I stepped closer, and leaned my head into the next room. Bella was sitting cross legged on the floor, next to an excited Emmett. He had set up one of his game consoles, an Xbox 360, I believe. The smile was evident on her face, her eyes determined as they twinkled up at the screen in concentration. I couldn't erase the toothy grin that was glued to my face. Watching her like_ this_, happy and playful, only pushed my feelings for her into overdrive.

I heard a soft chuckle from the opposite side of the room, and turned to see a grinning Alice. She was perched on the sofa, her knees raised to her chest, while she rested one of those ridiculous celebrity tabloids on the top of them. _Getting harder, I bet._ I scowled at her, and she smirked, before turning her eyes back to the magazine in front of her. By now, Bella and Emmett's game had finished, and both were staring curiously up at me from their places on the floor. I gave them a forced smile, before surrendering my strength, and plopping onto the couch next to Alice.

_That dress is hideous. You shouldn't even be allowed to go to a junk yard in that, let alone an award's show!_ I laughed softly, but she didn't pull her eyes from the magazine. I glanced back at the television, to where Bella and Emmett had begun their next game. It was some skateboarding game, which frankly, Bella was horrible at. I didn't have a doubt in my mind that Emmett already knew of this, and chose the game on purpose.

_Wow, that one is gorgeous! I have to find out who designed that, I'm going to have to- _Her thoughts stopped abruptly, and I immediately sat up in concern. She was going to have a vision. I moved closer to her, and watched as her eyes glazed. I watched in silence as the vision begun.

_A deserted highway. Dark gray pavement with a solid, yellow line to separate it. It was night, the sky was dark with the exception of the bright full moon. Two people stood silently, moving slowly, circling each other. Victoria was hunched, teeth bared as she growled menacingly at the other. Bella growled back, moving closer to the furied red-head vampire. Her arms were stretched, prepared for Bella's attack. Something in the distance caught Bella off guard, and she whipped her head up to listen. Before she could turn back around, Victoria had already sprung, knocking the two to the ground._

"No!" I snapped viciously. Alice was already standing, her eyes fixed on me. The noises of skateboards grinding against metal bars came to a halt, and I heard one of the controllers drop to the ground. I whipped my head to where Bella sat. Her face fell when her eyes met mine. In less than a second, with her new vampire speed, she was sitting next to me.

"What is it? What's wrong?"

I couldn't say anything. I opened my mouth to speak, but I felt the anger creeping up towards my throat. Regretting what I might say, I closed it. I turned to Alice, looking up at her as she stood before me.

"When?" I asked through my gritted teeth. She frowned, and her shoulders lowered in disappointment. _I'm sorry, Edward. I have no idea._

I could feel my entire body tense, and my knuckles bound into tight fists. I raised my left arm to smash it into Esme's glass coffee table, but a small hand grabbed it before it made the impact. I gasped at the feeling of Bella's fingers. She pulled my fist into her lap, and I uncurled my fingers. She held onto them as she stared at me in desperation.

"Edward? Alice, what did you see? Please tell me!"

I groaned, and lowered my head. Bella's fingers entwined with mine, and the change in me was extraordinary. I felt myself calming, and for a second, wondered if Bella had inherited the same kind of power as Jasper's, but I knew that it was just her touch. It always had that effect on me, even when she was human. Her fingers tightened around mine, and I finally looked at her. I couldn't lie to her. Not now.

"Victoria," I muttered, spitting the name out as if it were something revolting that I just tasted. She gasped, and her stillness made me nervous for a few seconds, before I heard her inhale a sharp breath.

"Well, she can't do anything, right? I'm a vampire now. I'm strong," she announced. She spoke with such confidence and clarity. If I didn't know what Victoria was capable of, I would've believed her. I shook my head, earning another frown from Bella.

"It's eight against one, though. Surely, she can't do any damage!"

It was my turn to tighten my hand, grasping her own fingers tightly. She noticed my behavior, and scooted closer to me on the couch. I was grateful. She was the only person who had the power to calm me like this. Not even Jasper could break through my anger. Only her.

"Bella, in the vision, it was just you and her. You got distracted and turned your head, and she lunged at you. And then it stopped," Alice explained, frowning as she finished the sentence. I sighed once more, the vision of Victoria toppling onto Bella flashing through my mind. I let out another low growl. Bella was still as she sat next to me, letting the information sink into her. She let go of my hand, and I felt empty without the contact. She stood, and turned to walk away. She only made it a few steps, before she turned back to us.

"Well, I guess I'll just have to be ready to fight then, won't I?"

* * *

**Bella.**

I predicted it, of course. I knew Edward would jump at the chance to rebuttal my proposition. But regardless of the fact that he's against this or not, it won't change Alice's vision. And according to the vision, Victoria and I were going to have a face-off. One on one. Vampire against vampire. To be honest, it frightened me quite a bit. Sure, I knew that I had somewhat of an upper-hand, considering I was a newborn, and my strength probably tripled hers, but I wasn't skilled like she was. I needed to be trained, and taught how to fight.

Which explains why Edward was being so unreasonable. He had been the only other one to actually see Alice's vision, yet he refused to accept it. He sulked around, demanding that I give up on the idea of being trained, because I didn't need it.

"We're just going to see where Alice's visions take us. We'll be extra careful. She won't get near you. You won't need training," he had reasoned with me in a soft voice. I knew it was in his nature. He had always been protective of me. But damnit, I was a vampire now. I didn't need to be treated like the fragile, breakable little human that I was before.

Of course, his intentions were only the best, and I knew that, I did. But I couldn't help but think that he had absolutely no faith in me. He didn't think that I stood a chance against Victoria. It stung a bit. His love for me was adoring, and very much appreciated, but right now, especially after everything that was happening with us, it wasn't needed. At least, not this kind of love. This overprotective, barbaric, _unnecessary_ shield that he casts over me. I hated it when I was a human, and I hated it even more now.

I was frustrated. It wasn't directed at Edward, or anyone else for that matter. I was just frustrated that things could never be normal. There always had to be _someone_ out there that wanted to kill me. James, Laurent, and of course, Victoria. I was a death magnet, that was for sure. Let me tell you, it's incredibly annoying to always have to fear for your life. It's really draining, even for a vampire.

Which was why I was nestled in my favorite patch of grass in the meadow. Our meadow. He hasn't been here since he found me bitten. When I had left, I told Alice quietly, but loud enough for Edward to hear, that I was going to be here. There was hope in my chest that he would follow, and we would work things out. Because even to the extent of our issues right now, this was our sanctuary. It was ours, and I knew it would make things easier for both of us.

But I had been laying here for the past two hours, and there was no sign of him.

My eyes were focused on the sky. I'd move from star to star, analyzing each one as I tried to dig up some knowledge in my previous Astronomy classes. The information was vague, but it was there, hidden in the back of my mind. Once I remembered one small little fact, I was bombarded with everything that connected to it. It was a joyous feeling to be honest, to have everything connect. If only life could be that easy.

I sighed, and turned my head to study a new star, when something cracked quietly in the forest next to me. I gasped, and immediately sat up. I kept my eyes locked onto the dark entry of the trees, searching for any familiar topaz eyes. The silence took over, but I wasn't reassured.

"Edward?" I whispered, my voice shaking. Silence.

Maybe .. tonight was the night. Maybe Alice's vision was prolonged, and Victoria's attack would be tonight. It would explain why the Cullen's weren't with me. A sickening, horrifying chill ran through my bones, and I whimpered, standing to my feet.

"Who's there? Come out now," I demanded, trying to sound dominant and cold. But I failed. My voice broke with the last word, and I coiled back into my patch of grass, my head whipping in every direction for a sign of Victoria.

Another _crack_. It was the sound of footsteps against thin twigs. This time, it came from behind me. Before I could turn around, a new scent hit me. It was so foul, so disgusting that it burnt my nostrils just inhaling it. I bit back my gag, and turned around. I gasped, and froze immediately.

"Bella?"

* * *

**Finally, some action! I'm sure you were all getting a little tired of just hearing about Bella & Edward's problems, so I'm actually beginning a plot now, haha. I love the Victoria action in Eclipse, so I had to make her my main enemy. Anyways, I hope I didn't disappoint. Let me know what you think. As always, your input is most important to me.**


	12. Accusations & Apologies

**Bella.**

Time was frozen. I was paralyzed to the spot where I stood. My entire body shook in slow tremors, as I came face to face with my intruder. He was staring back at me, the same bewildered expression as mine upon his face. His familiar brown eyes darkened, and I inhaled sharply, ignoring the foul odor that was clogging my senses. Though it was hard to endure, his human blood was calling to me as well. I held my breath, surprised that I had the strength to resist.

"Jacob," I mumbled, keeping my eyes locked to his. He was studying me, mostly my eyes. I blinked them open wider, hoping for him to catch a glimpse of the golden specks that lined my dark crimson eyes, almost taking over the red color completely. I watched in despair as his long, thick fingers curled into fists at his sides. I gulped, and stepped back.

"I thought you were dead."

The tone of his voice startled me, bitterness swallowing any trace of the happiness that I was waiting for. I flinched involuntarily, and opened my mouth to respond. I couldn't find the decency to form words, though I knew Jake deserved them. I had hurt him. I had caused both him and Charlie pain, because of my selfish actions. I deserved all of the hate that he probably held for me.

"Technically, I am," I mumbled, giving a hearty chuckle. I snuck a peek at his distraught face, hoping he'd at least find the humor in my response, but his face remained hard. He was breathing heavily, his chest rising and falling at a slow, but irregular pace. I could almost feel the anger radiating off of him.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, hanging my head. We fell into an uncomfortable silence. I listened to the sounds of his angry, shallow breaths as we stood motionless. _Say something. Forgive me._ I closed my eyes, waiting for any kind of movement. My ear twitched when I heard him sigh.

"You know what this means."

I snapped my head up, suddenly confused. His face was still tense. His jaw was locked, and his eyes were narrowed. His dramatic breathing had ceased, but I could tell he was trembling as well. I shook my head, my eyebrows raised in question.

"War, Bella. They broke the treaty," he seethed between gritted teeth. _War? Treaty?_ I frantically searched my head, trying to remember any detail about a treaty. Like always, the knowledge fell on my shoulders, and slapped me in the face with sudden realization. I gasped, jumping back.

"_No_!"

He sighed once more, shaking his head. His shoulder lengthed dark brown hair swung with the gesture, falling down to his upper-back.

"They broke the treaty," he repeated in a dark voice. "The Cullen's had to refrain from biting humans. I don't know the whole story, but you're a vampire now. We have no choice."

The anger was creeping up into my system, blinding me with a surprising fury that I didn't think I had inside of me. I growled loudly, baring my teeth and stepping forward on instinct. Jacob was startled, moving back as the growl continued to rumble low in my throat. I couldn't help myself. Though I had always considered Jake to be family before, he was now talking about slaughtering the only family I had left.

"Look what they've done to you, Bells. You're a monster." Though his words were soft, they boomed loudly in my ears, shooting at me like a bullet. _Monster_. I hated the word. My face fell, and I stepped away from him, relaxing myself to prevent from hurting him. I nodded, and watched at he relaxed as well. I wanted to show him that I had no intention of inflicting pain upon him. Me, on the other hand .. well, I was already in pain.

"Bella?"

I jumped at the different voice. It was loud, demanding and frantic. Jacob and I both turned our heads at the same time. A wave of relief and comfort fell over me, but I could see the hate and rage begin to take over my former best friend. The bushes moved aside as Edward, Alice and Emmett pushed their way into the small clearing, moving quickly to my side. My eyes were still on Jacob's, but I gasped in shrill surprise as I felt Edward's fingers lace through mine. I looked up at his face, but he was set on Jacob.

"We haven't broken the treaty," Edward snarled, his head moving forward an inch toward Jacob. I gripped his fingers tighter, silently asking him to refrain from attacking. Jacob scoffed, displaying a bitter smile as his eyes moved from Edward to our intertwined hands. He sniffed the air that surrounded me, and began to cough loudly. I quickly moved to help him, but Edward held me back, and I watched as Jake began to wave his hand in front of his face, as if getting rid of a bad smell.

"She reeks. She just like you." I flinched at his words, and desperately tried to think of some kind of witty response, but Edward snarled loudly again, and I felt that was a good enough way to sum up how I was feeling as well.

"It wasn't one of us who bit her. It was a nomadic vampire that passed through Forks last month. We've done nothing wrong. So I'd appreciate it if you would stop formulating vile plots of slaughter in your head."

Jacob looked surprised, but more defeated. My insides began to deflate. My best friend was thinking of ways to kill me. To kill my _family_. I watched as he shook his head, his eyes locking with mine. The look on his face was full of pure hatred. I shrank back into Edward's side. He pulled me closer to him, and every problem we were dealing with disappeared as I found my comfort. He was still snarling, probably in accord to something Jacob was thinking.

"Don't assume, Mutt. You have no idea what she's been through," Edward snapped viciously. I stared in curiosity, wishing that I knew what was going on. Jacob laughed once without humor, before narrowing his eyes at me yet again.

"Do you have any idea what you've done to Charlie? What you've done to your friends in Forks, what you've done to _me_?" he asked sharply, huffing in anger. "You're destroying Charlie. He hasn't been to work in weeks. My dad and I have to visit on a daily basis to make sure that he's eating. He's ruined," he spat in disgust at me. I pushed myself closer to Edward, feeling the depression as the mental image of Charlie popped into my head. I was hurting him. I was doing this to him. He doesn't deserve it.

"Put your tail between your legs and run, Mutt. I'm warning you. Keep your mouth shut-" Emmett began, moving to my other side.

"I knew something was up. At your funeral, they were all there!" he shouted, his accusing finger pointed at Alice. I shifted my eyes to look at her, surprised to find her lip curled in a snarl as well. "I could tell by the looks on their faces that you weren't gone. Not from them, at least. I knew that they had something to do with this!"

"Enough!" Edward bellowed, jumping forward. I grabbed his forearms with force, and held him back. Even as a newborn, I wasn't strong enough to keep him contained in my grip. I shot a helpless glance at Alice, and she quickly advanced to my side. She grabbed Edward's other arm, and we pulled him back. I looked at Emmett, who was on the verge of attacking as well.

"Please, Emmett," I whispered. His head shot up towards mine, and he sighed. Surrendering, he nodded. Turning my head, I glanced back at Alice, who was still holding a scowling Edward. I moved my head to Jacob, who was smirking. Something inside of me _snapped_. That was it. I advanced towards Jacob, not stopping until I was only inches away from his face. He didn't flinch, nor move backwards as I approached him.

"My transformation might've been a mistake, but there's nothing you can do about it. The Cullen's had nothing to do with the vampire who bit me. You have no reason to touch them when they're only taking care of me. You're my best friend. Well, you _were_ my best friend. And even though your new found disgust for me is hard to swallow, I won't let you stand here and ridicule me. I've done nothing wrong!"

"_Nothing wrong_? You don't consider murdering over ten innocent humans wrong?" His accusation was sudden, and I had to draw a breath to take it in. Edward was by my side in less than a second, moving closer to Jacob.

"That's not her, you idiotic dog! She has yet to have human contact!"

I was still confused. The sharp turn of this argument left me somewhat dizzy. I rounded on Jacob, pulling away from a overprotective Edward for a moment.

"You think I've been feeding off of humans? You think I would actually do that?" I asked, my voice barely above a whisper. The accusation left me with a dulling pain. His faith in me was completely faltered, just because of my transformation. I was a vampire, and my entire existence revolved around blood. I knew that. But how could he ever think I'd willingly kill to satisfy my thirst?

"There has been a string of murders in Forks. I know it's a vampire," he muttered. His eyes gazed at me, and seeing my hurt face, he sighed in defeat. "Seeing you, a newborn vampire. I'm sorry, Bella, I just thought-" I glared at him, and he stopped talking. I turned around, and pulled Edward with me. I laced my fingers with his left hand, and we headed for the forest entrance. I stopped suddenly, turning my head. Jacob was sulking in the opposite direction.

"Jacob?" I asked warily. He stopped walking, and his head turned to meet my gaze.

"Have a nice life."

* * *

**Edward.**

"It's Victoria, isn't it?" Bella's shaky voice asked, as we neared the house. I sighed, and kept my eyes ahead of me. Her hand gripped my forearm tightly, and I reluctantly met her stare. I bit my lip, gulping down the resistance. I knew I had to tell her. She wasn't a breakable human anymore. She didn't deserve to be kept in the dark like she so often was.

"I think so, yes. Carlisle has been keeping tabs of the murders for awhile now. And after Alice's vision earlier, well .." I trailed off, knowing how perceptive she was. She would get the point. I heard her sigh heavily next to me. Her hand was still on my arm, but I wasn't complaining. I have been without Bella's touch for so long, that any chance for minor contact that I could get, I eagerly took. I glanced down at her. She was chewing on her bottom lip, her face fallen into a saddened frown. I stopped abruptly, and pulled her back to me.

"What's wrong?" I whispered, as I stared at her crestfallen face. She released her bottom lip from the grip of her teeth, and it began to tremble lightly.

"Charlie .. he's hurting .." she whimpered. I grabbed her hand, and stroked the skin of her wrist with my thumb. It didn't help. Her body began to shake, and I watched helplessly as she began to fall to the forest floor. I didn't know what to do. She was still so tense with me, still upset with me after leaving her. I didn't want to make any wrong moves, or do anything that would push her over the edge.

"It's my fault," she sobbed, grabbing fistfuls of moist soil into her hands. She heaved, and pounded against the ground so hard, that the trees around us began to shake. I crouched down to her level, and took her small heart-shaped face with both of my hands.

"Shh, hey, look at me," I cooed. She met my eyes with hers. "Charlie will be fine. He may be hurting, but it's inevitable. He'll come to terms with it, and he'll be just fine," I assured her. She nodded, and brought her hands up to meet mine. She held them to her face, not breaking my gaze. Her body shook in another tearless sob, and I couldn't find the strength to hold myself back any further. Releasing her face, I enveloped her into my arms. My grip around her shoulders tightened. For one second, I relished in the feeling of having her in my arms, fearing that any minute now, she would thrash and demand to be let go. Instead, she leaned her head against my chest, wrapping both of her arms around my torso. I leaned down, and pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead.

I felt complete. This is where we belong. Together. We didn't belong separated, broken apart by our ridiculous decisions. Since the moment I spoke to her, I knew that we completed each other._ This _was where happiness was. _This_ was the only way I could be happy.

She shifted in my arms, and I watched as she lifted her face from my chest. Her shadowed eyes met mine, and she sniffled. She gave me a small smile, before returning her head to my chest.

"Edward?" she squeaked weakly.

"Yes?"

"I'm sorry," she mumbled into my shirt. My hand, which was currently stroking the ends of her wavy hair, stopped. I leaned my lips closer to her ear.

"What are you sorry for, Bella?"

She shook once more, and her grip on me tightened. She inhaled a sharp breath.

"Everything."

* * *

**Sorry it took so long for an update! I've been kind of sick lately, so sitting at the computer for long periods of time was not something I wanted to do. No, this will not be the last of Jacob. And I'm not going to make an enemy of his character (sorry, Jacob haters) But I hope I satisfied you all with this. Let me know what you think, I love hearing your input!**


	13. Resistance

**Edward.**

I let out a shaky breath as my eyes studied the all too familiar piece of jewelry that was hinged between my fingers. I had spent many nights staring at it, memorizing the way every diamond in the oval reflected the sunlight. This small ring was one of the only objects I had left from my human life. Though I treasured it immensely, it didn't belong to me. It didn't belong to be in my grasp right now. There was only one place it should be.

And that was upon Bella's hand.

I had planned to give it to her awhile ago, before this entire catastrophe began. I was going to retreat to one knee, and recite a paragraph full of cheesy, but meaningful words that would let Bella know even a fraction of how I feel for her. I was certain that she would make it difficult, and probably be overwhelmed with silly and unnecessary embarrassment, but it was something that I needed to do.

I just wasn't sure how I could do it now.

Of course, I know that Bella loves me. But the pessimism was eating away at me, the guilt pushing it forward every time I even glanced at her. I had left her. And even though I think her choice was rash, hasty and not the smartest, it was_her_ decision, and I had let go of that grudge long ago. But I didn't see how it was possible for her to forgive me. She endured the hardest part of vampirism, the first few weeks, without me. Sure, she had the family, but it wasn't the same. I knew how much she needed me. I knew the damage I had inflicted the last time I broke my word and left. Yet, I had managed to do it again. I just didn't see how she would say yes to my marriage proposal now.

I didn't know how much longer I could keep my distance with her. It wasn't right for us to be so apart, and though hurting a vampire is very difficult to do, I would be lying if I said I wasn't in pain right now. The aching in my chest, where my dead, shriveled up heart lay increased every second. I couldn't bare being in the same house with Bella, and not being close to her.

Especially after Alice's vision. I didn't know whose decision would change the outcome, but I was extremely paranoid. She wanted to train, to ready herself if the vision actually comes true. Of course, I refused. It was my nature. I didn't want to believe that Bella was in danger, but I knew she was. Even if the vision didn't happen, that wouldn't be the last of Victoria. She was a continuous force, a constant nuisance in my life. Bella was obviously her target, and being James's mate, I didn't doubt for one second that she wasn't as stealthy and lethal as he was.

Bella was strong, and I knew that would help her in the long run. Yet, I was still apprehensive. Victoria was wise, and very skillful. Bella's strength wouldn't overcome that, and it frightened me. So the sensible solution would be to have her trained and ready. It was the right thing, I knew it was, but I didn't know if I could do that. Watching her prepare herself for_ that _would be ridiculously difficult for me.

"Bella! Come on, that hurts!" Alice's shrill voice rang loudly throughout the house. _It is possible to express your feelings without physical violence. Damn. _I chuckled at the mental image of Bella punching Alice's forearm. She wasn't quite grasping the concept of how strong she really was. She was used to playfully punching all of us, expecting nothing but the pain of her own fingers as they hit our rock hard arms. But I think we've all experienced one of Bella's punches now, and we were all wary of our sarcastic comments around her.

"Oops! Sorry, Alice. It's really weird now. Whenever one of you yelps in pain, I always look around for the culprit. Guess it's easy to forget that I'm that strong, and .." Bella droned, and I stifled a laugh at Alice's thoughts. _She was never this talkative as a human. _I reached across the dresser, for the small black velvet box that was home to Bella's ring. _I'm kind of missing the silence and-_

I froze, dropping the box to the floor. Immediately, my own eyes closed as Alice's vision painted a clear picture in my thoughts.

_Charlie was walking up to the front door, knocking three times. He was donning his police jacket, and his regular uniform, except his face was scruffy and unshaven. His hair was untidy and was an array of mess on the top of his head. The door swung open, revealing a frowning Carlisle. A few short seconds later, a loud growl was heard._

I gasped, and jumped to my feet. Alice met me by the door, followed by a confused and frantic Bella.

"How much time? I have to get Bella out of here!" I exclaimed loudly, reaching behind her to grasp Bella's arm gently. She was staring back and fourth between us, wide-eyed. Alice shook her head frantically.

"No, there's no-" Three sharp knocks were heard from downstairs. "Time." I pulled Bella further down the hall at my quickest speed, but it wasn't fast enough. _Charlie? What is he doing here? Oh, no. This isn't good. Edward, keep her restrained! I'll try my best to get rid of him. _I gasped once more, as Bella stopped suddenly. She stiffened, her nostrils flaring. I watched in fear as the small glaze of topaz that colored her dark eyes disappeared, moving to a deep onyx color. I locked both arms around her as tight as I could. She inhaled, and snapped her head toward the staircase. I felt it moving up her body, to her throat before it actually escape.

A loud, terrifying snarl.

I couldn't open my mouth to call for the others to help, without risking Charlie hearing me. Instead, I waited for Bella's growl to shake them up. Rosalie and Emmett's door flew open, and they flew out. Bella was now struggling against my hold, thrashing in my arms. I winced every time her claws came into contact with the skin on my arm.

"Charlie is downstairs," I whispered as quickly and quietly as I could. Rosalie froze, her eyes widening. _So that's what the smell is. _I threw her a frantic, pleading glare, and she nodded. She lowered herself to the floor, and wrapped both of her arms around Bella's ankles. She kicked hard, and I gasped as Bella's foot came into contact with Rosalie's shoulder. Emmett hissed loudly.

"Em, I'm fine. Just grab her around the middle!" Rosalie ushered quietly. Emmett shut his mouth, and nodded. He threw Bella a hearty glance, before clutching her around the middle. I groaned as she continued to move rapidly through our locks. This was exactly what I wanted to avoid. This was what made us monsters.

Alice and Jasper appeared at my door, and I nodded my head toward it. Jasper nodded, understanding my gesture. He opened it, holding it steady while Bella continued to attempt to kick her feet free from Rose's grip. Rosalie was struggling, accidentally allowing an ankle to get free, and it slammed against the door loudly. I winced, and pushed Bella further into the room. All of us entered, and without a second delay, closed and locked it.

"Bella, please, calm down! You don't want that human, you don't want it!" I chanted, grabbing her snarling face with both of my hands. She growled at me, throwing her head back to struggle against Jasper's grasp. I moved toward the door, listening to what was happening.

_"I was just passing by, I saw your house. I- I wanted to see how you were all holding up. How is Edward doing?" _Charlie asked, his voice sounding miserable and gruff. I heard Esme sniffle, and Carlisle sigh.

_"Not very good. He refuses to return to Forks. I hate to say, but by the end of this month, we'll be moving to Alaska. That is where Edward is staying at the moment," _Carlisle explained.

_"He's taking it that hard?" _Charlie's voice was skeptical, and I was almost offended. Of course I would take it hard.

_"Oh, of course. Bella was Edward's world. She was the most important person to him. This is very, very difficult for him. He's devastated. Not to mention he feels as if it's his fault."_

_"His fault? Why would he think that?" _

_"It was their argument that pushed her to run. He feels as if he caused her to run into the forest. He's too heart-broken and ashamed to show his face around here," _Esme announced, giving a loud sigh. I listened as Charlie took a deep breath, and I could hear the deep gulp. There was movement, and I knew that Carlisle and Esme were going to ask him to leave.

_"You let Edward know that this isn't his fault. If he ever wants to stop by, maybe take something as a memory of Bella, he's more than welcome to." _I was shocked. I blinked twice, trying to swallow it down. He didn't blame me or this? I was positive that Charlie held nothing but negative feelings toward me after returning home from Italy. I never believed he would be sympathetic of me.

_"Yes, of course. Thank you so much, Charlie. We have to continue packing. But, we'll keep in touch. Bella is a part of our family as well, we know how hard it is," _Carlisle said, and they shuffled towards the door. I heard it open. I had to smile as his use of words. Instead of saying Bella_ was_, he said Bella _is_.

"No!" Alice gasped loudly from behind me. I didn't have time to turn around before Bella was pushing past me, exiting the room as quickly as she could. I jumped forward, racing to follow her down the hallway. I met her at the top of the staircase, and grabbed her from around the middle. I yanked her back, holding her closely to my chest. But I noticed she was no longer struggling and thrashing. I looked down at her face.

Her black eyes were wide as they stared down. I followed her gaze, and gulped, noticing that we had a clear view of Charlie at the front door. He was wiping tears with the sleeve of his jacket. We watched as Esme engulfed him in a hug, faking more realistic sniffles as she rubbed his back affectionately. Bella was whimpering in my arms, her bottom lip trembling. I moved my mouth to her ear.

"Shh, be calm," I whispered. She tensed, and I was amazed.

She was so much closer to Charlie. She was so close, that one sprint, one long jump down the staircase and she could easily have her prey. It would be so easy for her to kill him, but she was calm. She made no movement as she allowed me to hold her easily at the top of the staircase. I kept my gaze strictly upon her awe-struck face. I heard the door close, and Esme and Carlisle whipped their heads up at us.

"Is she okay?" Esme asked, taking a step forward. I shook my head, and looked down at her. Her eyes were closed, her fists tight against her sides. I moved my hand to her head, letting my long fingers trace the contours of her face.

"Charlie," she whispered, her voice low but astonished. I waited for the break-down. I waited for her to begin sobbing into my chest as she had done just a few days ago. I knew she would beat herself up over this. She would consider herself a monster for wanting to take Charlie's life. She would finally begin to realize what torture this curse really was.

But it never came. Instead, I was surprised to find a small smile.

"I .. I didn't kill him. I did it," she whispered again. I couldn't help but smile, even though the shock of her actions was making it difficult to form any coherent thoughts. I had said it before, and I will continue to say it. Bella was not a predictable creature. She continued to surprise me. I leaned down, and pressed my lips to her soft cheek. Her grin grew wider.

"I can't believe I was that strong!" she exclaimed, and I could hear the pride in her voice. I couldn't help but let out a relieved laugh. The door opened from down the hall, and I heard their footsteps approaching. Rosalie groaned.

"I'll say," she muttered, rubbing her shoulder tenderly. Bella gasped, jumping forward. She reached an arm out to touch it, but Rosalie moved away quickly, settling herself behind Emmett.

"I'm fine, seriously! I was just kidding!" _I'll just steer clear of physical contact from her for awhile . _

"I'm sorry, Rose!" she mumbled, giving her an apologetic glance.

* * *

**Bella.**

Carlisle and Esme sat me down and explained what happened with Charlie. Apparently, he was sent over this way to search for a stolen car, and saw the house. He wanted to see how the Edward and the rest of the family was holding up. Esme recited their conversation, but I knew she was editing to keep me calm. Though I was a bit disoriented through his visit, I knew it _had_ actually upset Esme somewhat. I could hear it in her voice.

I was elated with myself that I held the restraint to resist Charlie's blood. It was the best feeling in the world, knowing that I overcame something that was supposed to be impossibly difficult, especially as a newborn. Though I was happy, I was also very upset. Seeing Charlie again wasn't something that I needed, no matter how much I wanted it. Seeing those lone tears fall down his face, _because of me_, was incredibly painful.

On instinct, I'd admit that my first reaction after Charlie left was to cry. I wanted nothing more than to bury my face into Edward's comfortable shoulder, and release every amount of despair I held for Charlie. But my pride wouldn't allow me to do so.

I've only been thinking of myself lately. It's just been about my own emotions, my own feelings, just _me_. I wasn't taking in account of the others. They were probably fed up with the crying, weeping vampire who sulked around all day. All I had been doing lately is crying. That was never me. As a human, I was very self-conscious. It took a lot for me to actually cry in front of other people. But now, it was a daily thing. And I wanted it to stop.

Things with Edward_ were _getting better. I was falling back into my happy place. But every time I let that content feeling take me over, I found any excuse I could to bring it back down. I was looking for any excuse to remain unhappy, and that was not only extremely childish and foolish, but selfish at the same time. I had to think about my family. This was most likely frustrating to them. _Especially_ Jasper.

So after my conversation with Carlisle and Esme, I had made up my mind. I was going to start making myself happy. I was going to take the steps. I was going to push myself to get better, and I knew exactly where to start. Gripping Edward's hand, I pulled him into the room and shut the door behind me. He looked confused, but watched as I took my place nervously in front of him.

"I'm sick of being sad," I murmured. He nodded.

"As am I."

"Well, let's fix that."

His eyebrow raised, and he opened his mouth to question my statement, but I was already moving forward. Slinging my arm around his neck, I pulled his face down to meet mine, and crashed my own lips against his.

* * *

**Sorry for the delay! Things have been pretty crazy around here. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter. I was actually thinking of doing something, and maybe you could give your opinion? It'll be somewhat of a website, just like others have, with some things from my stories. I've already used my photoshopping skills to create Bella's heart-shaped crest, so that would be featured, as well as other things. Would that be something that would interest you? Let me know! But thank you so much for your reviews! I'm excited that I'm passing the 100 mark, so keep it up!**


	14. Twinkle

**Bella.**

As a human, kissing Edward was probably the single most amazing experience in the world. I wasn't sure what part of me reacted so feverishly, but I found a strange passion ignite within me every time our lips touched. Though he was always careful, always cautious of our movements, he never failed to leave me breathless. The smallest amount of pressure from his icy lips onto mine always sent me into a frenzy. My heartbeat would begin to race, I'd grow dizzy and a heated surge of necessity would pulse loudly throughout my veins. It was easy to say that I never thought that kissing Edward was something that could get any better.

Oh boy, how wrong I was.

At first, he was confused. His lips remained frozen against my own, and I could almost taste the confusion and shock. But I was in no position to stop my assault. I pushed myself closer to him, my fingers fisting a soft handful of his glorious bronze locks. After a few more seconds, he was still unresponsive. I sighed against his lips, and stepped down from my tip-toe position, turning to pull away from him. I didn't meet his gaze, not wanting him to see the rejection that I'm sure heavily tainted my eyes at this moment. I gulped, before turning on my heel to exit the room.

My right hand was reaching for the golden doorknob, but I felt Edward's presence close to me. I turned my head to question this, when his hand caught mine. He closed the door quickly, and I heard the soft_ click _of the lock. I squinted in confusion, and lifted my head to look at him. I almost jumped at the very small distance between our faces. I opened my mouth to take a small breath, but that was all it took. The distance closed.

Edward's lips were urgent against mine, growing harder with every second. His hand released mine, and he moved both towards my shoulders, where he shoved lightly. I felt myself being slammed against the door, but I didn't care. Melting against his mouth, I let myself go. My hands involuntarily moved up his chest, meeting around his neck where I grasped the cool, slick skin. He let out a soft growl as his kisses grew more hungry.

I still felt it, though. It was the barrier that I had grown so used to. He had set it up for himself when I was human, stopping himself before he was too far gone. He didn't want to take any chance in hurting me, and though I knew his primary concern was my safety, it was very aggravating. But now, it was simply unnecessary. He couldn't break me anymore. If anything, I'd have to be careful of_ my _actions. I grunted loudly. I wasn't a fragile human anymore. This barrier was coming down. Indefinitely.

I parted my lips quickly, and he froze. I could hear my own husky, ragged breathing on instinct. Opening my eyes, I caught the stare of his topaz orbs. I was never good at intimacy, for intimacy wasn't something Edward and I shared a lot of. But I saw it. The raw passion that sugar-coated his golden eyes was there. It was screaming at me to continue, and I gladly obliged.

I caught his bottom lip between mine, and drew it in. I sucked on it gently, and closed my eyes in contentment when I felt his body shudder against mine. He froze again, and I feared that he would finally put a stop to this. My fears fell away when his strong fingers gripped my small waist tightly. He roughly yanked me closer to him, and I grinned against his mouth, releasing his bottom lip. I pulled away for a moment, and stared at him. A small, devious smile etched across his flawless features before he leaned it to meet me half-way. This time, this kiss was mutual. It was pure ecstasy.

Our lips moved in perfect synchronization. Though my heart ceased to beat, I wasn't mistaken to feel the sharp throbbing that ached against my chest. It tingled throughout my entire body, reaching to the very tips of my toes. I almost believed that nothing could feel so good, until he slipped his tongue into my mouth. I almost yelped in pleasure at the contact of his chilling tongue against mine, moving together for dominance. I could feel myself trembling at the intensity of our kiss, but I didn't mind it.

I guess _he_ did, though.

Not breaking our kiss, my feet suddenly left the ground. I opened my eyes, prepared to protest, when I felt my back hit the soft cushions of the bed beneath me. I giggled against his mouth, and felt him smile. I opened my eyes once more, and saw him hovering above me. He was straddling me, one of his legs on each side of my body. I didn't mind it, but the physical desire for him ached throughout my body.

I reached up, moving my arms to lock them around his torso, and pulled him down. His body fell onto of mine with a thud, as he wasn't able to resist the strength I was inflicting. His eyes immediately widened, alert that he might've hurt me. I giggled once, and cleared away his worries with another heated kiss. Our tongues met once more, and I felt myself growing dizzy.

This continued for a few minutes. I wasn't sure when he had freed his arms from my grasp, but I gasped when I felt his hands move to my stomach. Still moving his mouth quietly against mine, his fingers reached under the hem of my t-shirt, brushing against the exposed skin of my stomach. I couldn't stifle the traitor moan that escaped my throat as I pulled him closer to me.

His hand crept painfully slow up my side, reaching just below my breasts. I tensed, waiting for him to move closer. He continued to massage the cool, sensitive skin of my stomach, disappointing me. I could feel the hesitation in his gestures, and I decided to take control. I pushed him off of me for a second, before gracefully flipping us over, allowing me to hover above him. I quickly reached for the buttons of his shirt. His hands returned to my hips, and he expertly stroked the skin that was left exposed earlier from his movements. I was growing entirely too needy to care anymore. Instead of unfastening the buttons, I hurriedly ripped them off, pulling the shirt open and off of his shoulders.

I couldn't help but marvel at his beauty. I had seen him shirtless plenty of times, but with my new sight, it was incredible. I was left breathless, speechless and completely amazed by his body. I leaned down, and pressed my cool lips against the hollow of his throat, moving down as my kisses grew deep. When my lips touched the skin next to his belly-button, he gasped, arching his back. His hands gripped my shoulders, and he yanked me up to his level, crushing his lips to mine.

I suddenly couldn't take it anymore. I hadn't ever done this before, but I knew exactly what my body was asking for. I knew exactly what it was aching for, what it wanted more than anything. Pulling away from Edward, I grabbed the bottom of my t-shirt, and ripped it over my head, leaving me in my black satin bra. Edward's eyes were wide, but lustful as he moved forward. I saw his lips moving, trying to form sentences, but I quickly silenced him with my lips.

He was just as eager as I was, his fingertips leaving a hot tingling trail of pleasure as they danced across my ribs. If possible, the kiss was growing more heated, more pressured by the second. My hand reached down, and I fumbled for the button of my blue jeans. He froze, all-too familiar for my liking. I continued to kiss him, waiting for him to regain himself and return my affection.

"Bella," he muttered against my lips, moving his head so I caught a mouthful of his jaw instead. I sighed, and pulled my fingers away from the zipper of my pants. I moved my head up to catch his gaze. He was concentrated on the window across the room, where I could see faint sunlight beginning to drape across the closed curtains. I frowned.

"What is it? I thought you wanted this," I murmured. He snapped his head in my direction, his eyes hard and tense.

"I do. Believe me, I want this very much. But I think it'd be more appropriate for us to wait." He caught the sight of my crestfallen face, and immediately opened his mouth once more. "Until we're completely fixed, Bella. We don't know if this will help us, and I will not take any risks. I cannot stand being away from you anymore," he whispered, lowering his face to mine. I gulped, and nodded.

Though I was extremely disappointed, I was glad he had stopped us. I knew this wasn't right, no matter how much I wanted it or not. I had believed that this was a healthy way for us to release our problems, but if I were smart, I'd release just how stupid that idea was. We both clearly still had some problems to work through, and though they were getting better, they were still there. I wanted my first time with Edward to be out of love and passion, not sadness and regret. I'm just relieved he had stopped us. I had increased strength as a newborn, however, I most definitely did _not_ have the strength to stop that.

"I understand, and I agree with you."

He gave me a small smile, and nodded. He leaned down, and pressed a small kiss to my lips. It was quick, chaste and last only a few seconds, but the meaning of it was very clear. _You're going to be okay._ I smiled up at him, before he hopped off of the bed. He retrieved the shirt from the floor, prepared to slip it back on, but taking a glance at the buttons strewn across the floor, he chuckled.

"Have fun explaining that to Alice. She's going to kill you for ruining this shirt," he announced, giving me a hearty laugh. I couldn't help but grin. He crossed the room, to his dresser by the window. He drew the shades, and I sighed at the sight of the forest kissed by the sunlight. I turned my eyes, and watched his bare shoulders move as he rummaged through his dresser for another shirt. The sunlight was slowly creeping further into the room, when it reached Edward.

His skin lit up, glowing intensely under the hot sunlight. I gasped loudly, rising to my feet. As a human, it looked as if small diamonds were implanted into his skin. But now, seeing him as he really was, I couldn't comprehend how gorgeous he really was. The once diamonds were now flickers of shimmering glitter, moving perfectly against his skin as he continued to look for a shirt. I continued to stare for a few seconds, until he turned around to face me, a fresh shirt in his hand. He opened his mouth to speak, but once he saw my astounded stare, he stopped.

He watched as I strided to where he stood. I take a breath, before stepping into the sunlight with him. It was his turn to gasp. I looked down at myself. I hadn't put my t-shirt back on, but for this, I was glad. I gulped, taking a deep breath as I studied my own glittering skin. It shimmered as I moved my arm, catching my eye everywhere. A paler, sparkly hand reached over and tipped my chin up. It wasn't until now that I realized Edward had moved closer to me.

"There are absolutely no words to describe your beauty," he muttered, his voice husky and hushed. The corner of my lips tugged into a small smile as I stared up at his topaz eyes. Even _those_ seemed to sparkle.

His free hand moved around my waist, locking me in place. The hand on my chin moved downward, trailing across my chest, breasts, and down to my bare stomach. I closed my eyes before they rolled back into my head from the feeling. I lowered my head, opening my eyes. I watched silently as his twinkling fingers caressed the skin of my stomach. He was tracing circles, watching as the gleaming increased against my own sparkling skin every time he moved his finger.

I felt his eyes on the top of my head, and looked up to meet them. His stare was one that I would've never been able to fully appreciate as a human. He spoke a million words with his golden eyes, yet only trying to let me know one thing. _He loves me._ The adoration and enchantment that coated them was screaming at me, trying to make me understand a fraction of how much I mean to him. I returned the same look, hoping I gave him the same kind of reaction.

He smiled softly, his lips pressed together. My head was spinning with delight. Edward really was the only way I could be happy. I was getting by without him, but barely. I was _existing_, taking up space, but I wasn't living in the least. If he hadn't of returned, I wouldn't feel like this right now. It was utterly insane how much happiness one could hold in their body, but I felt as if I were about to burst. It really was inhumane how much I loved him, but I guess that's kind of appropriate.

And right now, as we stand holding each other, twinkling skin touching, nothing else mattered. I knew everything that had happened between us wasn't important at the moment. I knew that we would get past this, and I would soon be able to feel this kind of happiness every second, of every day. The obstacles, such as our differences and Victoria were minimal compared to a eternity of feeling like this. I would do _anything_ for this. _Anything_ for him.

His hand was at my chin again, pulling it up. I didn't have enough time to look at him before his lips were soft against mine. This kiss was different from the other ones. it wasn't hard, hungry and eager. He was delicate, brushing his mouth against mine with the smallest pressure. I didn't deepen it. Feeling like _this_ was enough for me right now.

When he pulled away, he grinned at me.

And despite the fact that I had a psychotic revengeful vampire plotting to kill me, I felt safe. For the first time in a very long time, I felt safe.

And _damn_, it felt good.

* * *

**Sorry, it's kind of short. I skipped Edward's POV this chapter. I thought it was enough in just Bella's, but I might write it as a bonus chapter in his POV later on. And don't think this means a happy, cheery relationship! Sure, it's fixing itself but I am not done with the drama. Haha. For those of you who are interested, I posted the link to my website with pictures from these stories on it. It's my homepage link. So far I only have Bella's Cullen crest, but I think that's all there really is to be included right now. Anyway, please, please review! I have a lot of alerts, favorites and views for this but not nearly as many reviews. Let me know what you think!  
**


	15. Jealousy & Failure

**Edward.**

As I grabbed another CD from off of my shelf, I couldn't help but smile in elation while remembering yesterday's events. Though I knew that we weren't completely healed, I couldn't deny myself the happiness that tingled among every inch of my body. I had always known that kissing Bella was an extraordinary delight, but yesterday completely blew my mind. It was so much more intense, much more astonishing and passionate when I didn't have to worry about breaking her. I was surprised that I had the strength to stop where I knew our intimacy was heading, but it needed to be done. No matter how much I _ached_ for it.

Of course, Jasper had picked the _perfect_ time to stay indoors. He felt the lust from where he sat downstairs, and from Alice's thoughts, was having a hard time keeping his hands off of her. I would have laughed, if he hadn't of told Emmett. I was used to the constant teasing that he dished, but I knew Bella's newborn temper wouldn't sustain his insulting comments. Then again, Bella _was _stronger than him at the moment. I chuckled at the idea of her becoming angry at him.

I neatly placed the CD, which was a compilation of jazz music, into the box with the rest of them. Bella stood on the opposite side of the room, removing various posters and pictures from off of my walls. We were staying true to Carlisle's claim and heading to Alaska. It was the perfect place for Bella to learn natural control. And the perfect place for us to be alone and start anew. I smiled at the thought of it.

"What are you so happy for?" I heard her ask playfully from across the room. I chuckled again.

"I have my reasons."

She rolled her eyes, but threw me a grin before turning her attention back to the pictures in front of her. She plucked one out that was hidden behind a larger picture, and brought it close, examining it. I watched as her eyebrows burrowed in confusion, and she made a soft _hmm_ noise. I moved from my spot by my shelves, and crossed the room quickly. She held the picture up for me to see.

"Who are they? I've never seen this picture before."

I delicately took the picture from her, only glancing at it once before I answered her.

"That's the Denali clan. The ones who reside in Alaska. You'll be meeting them soon, considering that's where we'll be staying until Esme can fix up our house," I explained, and she nodded, frowning slightly. I knew it was bothering her to not know everything. I smiled, and pulled her closer, raising the picture before both of our eyes.

"That is Carmen and Elezar, they're mates. Beside them are Irina, Kate and Tanya," I announced, pointing to each of them as I reached their name. She was staring curiously at one figure, and I followed her eyes to where Tanya stood, smiling brightly into the camera. I cocked my head to the side, trying to read her expression. I watched as a flash of recognition crossed her features, before it turned into a deep frown.

"What's wrong?" I asked, immediately alarmed. She coughed once, lowering her face. My fingers gently grasped her chin, and I raised it without hesitation. I met her gaze, and she sighed, looking back at the picture once more.

"This .. this is Alaskan clan?"

"Yes. Is something wrong?" I inquired, concerned. She cleared her throat. I almost smiled at the familiar look that she gave me. As a human, it was usually accompanied by a beautiful rush of faint red blood to her cheeks. She was either embarrassed or uncomfortable. I didn't like the idea of either, but tried to hide it. I knew it was bugging her for me to be so insanely over-protective.

"Rose .. before I was bitten .. that night, she told me about them," she explained quietly, while gesturing back to the photograph. "She told me about how you showed no interest in any of the females, but I was just wondering .." she trailed off, lowering her head once more. My fingers were at her chin again, and I tried to pull it up. This time though, she held her stance. I sighed, crouching to the floor so I could look up at her face. I smiled softly at her, making her snicker quietly.

"What is it, Bella?"

"Did any of them, you know, show any _interest_ in you?"

Her voice was trembling, but I felt my own body tremble once at the question. Of course, it was ridiculous to get her all worked up over nothing. But I knew my Bella, and I knew her reaction would be anything but calm if I told her that there _had_ been one. She gasped suddenly, making me swing my head back toward her. She was frowning as she stared down at me. I rose, standing straight once more.

"Which one? Please don't tell me it was this one," she mumbled, before pointing a finger to Tanya's grinning face. I gulped, and grimaced. She let out a small growl, and muttered something under her breath that sounded like "_damnit, figures_."

"I let her know that there wasn't any hope for a future relationship. There's nothing for you to freak out over," I said cautiously, raising my arms. Her head snapped up from the photograph, her eyes angry.

"I'm not freaking out!" she bellowed. I winced, and she slapped her hand over her mouth. _Could you ask Bella to not freak out a little quieter? She's louder than the TV!_ I rolled my eyes at Emmett, and sighed. I pulled Bella's hand away from her mouth.

"Sorry," she whispered, her tone apologetic and pleading. "It's just that .. she's ridiculously gorgeous."

I smiled at her, shaking my head. Bella easily surpassed both Tanya and Rosalie's beauty added together as a human. As a vampire, well, let's just say that I would never give Tanya a second glance, even if I had been interested. Bella hadn't the faintest idea of how utterly breath-taking she really was. Guess I would have to start reminding her on a daily basis.

"There's no comparison," I assured her, kissing a spot below her ear. She groaned.

"I know there isn't!"

I laughed, shaking my head. I left another kiss on her smooth skin, before returning to my spot at the shelves. I lowered another CD into the box, before turning around. I grinned at Bella, who was watching me curiously.

"You are the most breath-taking beautiful creature to ever grace this planet. Whether you accept it or not, it is true."

She rolled her eyes again, but smiled softly, and tucked the picture into the small folder with the rest of them. We continued to work in silence, with the occasional questions from Bella, or the humming of low tunes that would pop into my head as I picked up random CDs. Emmett and Jasper were watching a football game downstairs, while Alice and Rosalie packed their belongings, not trusting them to do it neatly enough. They were gossiping quietly from Alice's room, folding clothes as they chatted. Alice was mid-sentence while they discussed housing options in Alaska before I heard her gasp loudly. I closed my eyes, knowing what was coming.

_Red eyes. They were everywhere. Bright, crimson colored pupils that followed the actions of the person in front of them. A bushel of frizzy red hair stepped from the crowd, her eyes slightly darker and dominant. She was grinning, her mouth moving fast to form words. She turned her head, and spoke to the vampires that stood behind her. They emerged from the darkness of the forest, approaching her to stand by her side. They stood in silence for a minute, before they quickly scampered away. One, two, three, four .. it was hard to count how many there were. She yelled a command, her mouth opening wider. They all came to an abrupt halt, moving quickly toward her. She held out an item of clothing, and they all sniffed for a second before dashing quickly away. A tall, muscular young man with scruffy blonde hair whispered something into her ear. She smiled once, before reciting a name. Bella._

"Alice!" I roared, not bothering to wait for Bella before I stomped quickly into her room. She already had the door open, waiting for me. I paced quickly, as Alice waited patiently for Bella to enter the room as well. She moved to my side, touching my arm. I sighed heavily.

"What did you see?" she asked Alice, determined and eager. I frowned, but quickly hid it. It was very easy for me to forget that Bella wasn't so fragile anymore. But even as a vampire, it was still in my nature to protect her from any harm. The idea that Bella was going to be included in this, that she was going to be fighting alongside us if that's what it came to, nearly ate me alive.

"Victoria has created an army of newborns. Their eyes were so red, and they were so wild, I know that's what they are. They're coming for you, Bella. They had one of your shirts. They must've took it from Charlie's house-"

"Charlie!" Bella gasped. "They were in the house? Was he hurt? Was he-"

"No, Bella. I would've seen it if-" Alice stopped once more, and another vision engulfed us both.

_Charlie was quickly back-stepping, until his body hit the wall behind him. His eyes were wide with fear as he stared at the figure in front of him. He cringed, and cowered his head as the red-eyed figure stepped closer, lunging forward._

The vision stopped, and I felt my body freeze with an uncomfortable sheet of ice. Alice was frantic.

"Charlie," was all she sputtered out.

* * *

**Bella.**

I let out a shrill yelp, before quickly dashing out of the door and sprinting quickly down the stairs. I ignored Edward and Alice's frantic pleas for me to stop. Charlie was in danger. I didn't stick around to hear what Alice's second vision was of, but from the second his name escaped her lips, I knew it wasn't good. Carlisle met me by the front door.

"Bella, what's-"

"Stop her!" Rosalie screeched from the top of the stairs. I growled loudly at her, clawing quickly from Carlisle's grasp as I tried to break free. Why were they holding me? They had seen it. Charlie was in trouble! I couldn't just sit here and do nothing. Why were they _doing_ this? I felt another pair of arms constrict around me, and I immediately recognized the scent as Jasper's. I groaned. This was really starting to get annoying. I glanced up at Carlisle's worried face.

"Alice saw Charlie. He's in danger!" I pleaded desperately. Carlisle frowned, his eyes moving to Alice, who frowned and nodded. I grimaced. I knew it was true, but I had a faint hope that maybe I was just over-reacting.

"I think it would be wise if you stayed here while Edward, Alice, and I checked this out."

My face fell even more, and I gulped down the hurt. This was my father. Sure, I was probably causing him emotional distress and damage, but I loved him. Though my human years spent with him were awkward and uncomfortable, damnit, I love him! Why would they keep me here, worrying and frantic while _they_ checked on _my _own father?

"If he is .. hurt, it wouldn't be a good idea for you to be around the blood. It's more safe with Edward and Alice," he explained gently. I shook my head furiously.

"I resisted him the other day! I'm strong enough, I know I am!"

"I'm sorry, Bella. Please just stay here with Rosalie and Jasper. I will bring my phone and call you as soon as I see what's happened," he said, his voice finalized. I gulped, lowering my head to the ground. I yanked myself away from Carlisle and Jasper's grasp, moving to stand across the room. He knew I was angry, and sighed. I wouldn't accept any apologies right now.

Don't get me wrong, I knew that this was for the best, but I still couldn't help but feel disappointed. This was my own father, and I couldn't even help protect him. I was extremely grateful for them, but right now, I just needed to be unnecessarily angry and blow off my steam. I felt Edward's cool hands grip my forearms, and I moved my head away to look somewhere else but at him. He sighed heavily.

"Bella, please, you want him safe, don't you?" he murmured gently. I nodded, still not meeting his eyes. His fingers were at my chin, for what felt like the millionth time that day, and he pulled it to his face.

"Everything will be okay. We will take care of it, I promise."

I nodded, and let him embrace me in a warm hug before he left quietly with Carlisle and Edward. I felt like a failure as I stood awkwardly in the middle of the room with Jasper. I snuck a look at the blonde vampire who was standing next to me. He was frowning at me.

"Don't feel like that, Bella. This isn't your fault."

I opened my mouth to protest, but he sent me a sharp look. I couldn't help the laugh that flittered from my lips. Jasper was beautiful, just as the rest, but he wasn't very good at looking angry or intimidating. When I saw the confuse glance he was giving me, I closed my mouth to try to muffle the laughs. His lips twitched into a playful grin, as he reached a hand out and pushed me gently.

"So, what now?" I asked, taking a breath as I threw myself down onto one of the couches. Rosalie plopped down next to me, grabbing the remote control and switching the television on.

"We wait for Carlisle to call," I heard Jasper say as he sat down on an armchair. I nodded, trying to pay attention to whatever was on the screen. The nerves were getting to me, though. My fingers danced impatiently across my knees, which were curled up to my chest. I clicked my tongue, frantic for a quick call from Carlisle. _Let him be okay. Please, if there is a God, please let Charlie be okay._ I hadn't realized my eyes were closed, but when I opened them, I saw Jasper glaring me. I winced.

"Sorry," I mumbled. I shifted my eyes back to the television screen. Rosalie had stopped channel surfing, and left it at some television show on MTV. I recalled watching it once with Jacob. It was called_ Pimp My Ride _or something.

There was a sharp knock at the door suddenly. I looked at Rosalie curiously, who shrugged. Esme glided through the backdoor, meeting us in the middle. She looked equally confused as the knocks became louder and more impatient. Esme stepped closer to the door, and just as her hand was about to turn the knob, a familiar voice shouted through the wood that separated us.

"I know you blood-suckers are in there. Open this god damn door, or I'll break it down myself!"

* * *

**Ah, drama! How I love thee. Haha. I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I'm going to try to make them a bit more eventful & interesting now, just so I don't _put anybody to sleep_. Sorry if my other chapters were boring, but you've read this far so _obviously_ you're still awake. And for those of you who asked, yes I did create that necklace. I did it with PSP 8. If I had any jewelry making skills whatsoever, I would buy the stuff and sell them, but the last success I had with making my own jewelry was with one of those shrinky dink machines, haha. But feel free make your own if you like it! Anyways, I just want to wish everybody a Merry Christmas! I know some places celebrate Christmas on the 24th, so if you're reading, I hope your day is wonderful. The best gift you guys could give me is to review & let me know how this chapter was! You guys always leave me smiling. :D Have a wonderful Holiday!**


	16. Foul Odors

**Bella.**

I took a shaky breath, and ignored the fact that all three vampire's eyes were on me, their eyes searching for a solution. Esme had backed away from the door, glancing nervously back at me. I sighed. I knew the voice fairly well, it belonged to the boy that once held the title of my best friend. It was Jacob. His tone was harsh and loud, and the knocking quickly shifted into demanding pounds that made the house shake and rattle.

"Bella, please-" Esme began, her voice timid. I stood, and nodded. I crossed the room as she stepped back, allowing me space enough to move in front of her. My hand was trembling as I turned the doorknob, and yanked open the wooden door. Jacob stood on the other side, his hair in a frizzy disarray and his eyes wild. His hand immediately reached out and seized my shoulder, gripping it tightly. Though the pressure he applied didn't hurt, Jasper and Rosalie were on each side of me in an instant, hissing loudly.

"Remove your hand, mutt. Or I will gladly do it for you," Rosalie snapped viciously. Jacob ignored her, his dark eyes burning into mine. I gulped, and couldn't help but feel the fear work through my body. Not for myself, though. If Jacob was angry enough, he could phase, and I didn't want him to harm a hair on Rosalie, Jasper or Esme's head. I opened my mouth to speak, but Jacob growled and pushed me back. Jasper jumped forward, but luckily, I was fast enough to shove him back.

"What is the meaning of this, Jacob?"

"I don't know which one of your leech family is involved, but I swear I will rip every single one of you into pieces," he promised, his face relaxing as an aura of darkness surrounded him. I gasped loudly, recoiling as if he had just smacked me in the face. I growled at him, moving closer.

"You will not touch my family. What is going on? Why the hell are you here, threatening us?" I spat. It was hard to detain the disgust that mocked my voice, but I didn't mind. Jacob shook his head, and stray black hairs flew around his tan face in fury.

"Charlie- you remember him, right? He's only your father, the man who took you in and took care of you for years- is in the hospital. Bruises in the shapes of fingers were found on his ribs, which are broken. He's so messed up, Bella. It was a vampire that I had to fight off. Your father was attacked by one of _your_ kind."

I felt my jaw open, and my eyes widen, but I couldn't control my reaction. Charlie was in the hospital. With broken ribs. He was attacked. By vampires. The endless stream of painless thoughts flew through my head, and I sunk to my knees in realization. I took a big gasp, before emitting what was the vampire equivalent to a sob. Esme dropped to my side, her arm draping across my shoulder as she pulled me closer.

"Why do you think it was any of us? There are more vampires than just us, you know!" Jasper bellowed. Jacob snickered, and shrugged. I snapped my head up towards him, surprised by the deep flow of anger that I suddenly felt. I shook my head.

"I think you should leave, Jacob. How can you stand there and accuse my family of this? I know who did this, and it certainly wasn't any of us. I don't understand how you can feel so completely different for me now. Just because my heart ceases to beat, doesn't mean I'm a heartless monster. I'm still Bella. And to me, you're still Jake. You're still my best friend. I can't comprehend how you could have so much hatred and mistrust for me. And I can't comprehend why I care so damn much. You mean a lot to me, Jacob. But the death threats have got to stop."

He was silent throughout my rant, but I took pleasure in knowing that I had rendered him speechless. He opened his mouth to speak, but closed it after a few seconds. The anger and fury was still there, as it should be. Charlie was in the hospital. Inside, I was a mess as well. But I noticed it was no longer directed at me. He sighed heavily, and ran a large calloused hand over his face.

"Bella, it's just that-"

"We'll be gone by the end of the month. Just thought I'd let you know so you can begin organizing your celebration for our departure," I added, lifting my chin defiantly. He sighed again, and opened his mouth to retaliate. I was going to allow him to, when the ring tone of Jasper's phone began to fill the room. I gasped, and before Jasper could even move his fingers, I snatched it out of his pocket.

"Hello?" I answered breathlessly, my fingers twitching in anticipation.

"Bella? Why are you answering Jasper's phone?" Alice's voice inquired. I sighed.

"Doesn't matter. How's Charlie? Did you find out anything? Did you-"

"Bella, shut up! Now if you'll stay quiet, I will explain. Apparently, the vampire, who is indeed a part of Victoria's band of newborns, went after Charlie. When he tried to run, the vampire grabbed him around the torso, and cracked a few ribs. Jacob's scent is so strong here. That must've been why I couldn't see the rest of the vision. But Jacob must've stopped him, and brought him to the hospital. Carlisle has already left to go check things out. But the outlook is quite good. He'll recover quickly," she explained quickly.

I breathed a sigh of relief, and after murmuring a quick goodbye, I snapped Jasper's phone shut and tossed it back to him. I turned to look at Jacob again, but it was like seeing it for the first time.

It wasn't until now that I noticed the scratches that aligned themselves across his face. A dark bruise was forming along the top of his forehead, clashing horribly against the dark tone of his skin. He was pretty roughed up, but he did it for Charlie. I bit my lip, and to add to the list of overwhelming emotions I was feeling- was guilt. I glanced up at Jasper who was staring at me curiously.

"Sorry, Jazz. I'm a mess," I muttered pathetically. He gave me a half-way grin, before turning serious again. His eyes were intense as they questioned me. I knew exactly what they were asking. _What do we do about the dog?_

Jacob had been surprisingly quiet for the few minutes. As a human, I remembered it took him a lot to close his mouth. I almost smiled, as memories of the chatter-boxed boy began to fill my head. If only existence could be that easy.

I stepped closer to Jacob, who raised an eyebrow in confusion. I was wary of my next action, wandering if it were a smart thing to do. But as I glanced at the dark crimson marks that covered his face, my decision was already made. I rushed forward, and locked my arms around his neck, squeezing him with little force so I wouldn't hurt him. He inhaled a sharp breath of surprise, but to my delight, didn't push me away.

"Thank you, Jake. Thank you so much," I mumbled into his shoulder. I knew that he was still confused. I pulled myself out of his arms. Extending my arm forward, I let my cold fingers brush against the contours of his cheeks. I let them run across every single cut and bruise, wishing that it had been me instead. As my thumb moved to his lips, I noticed that he was smiling softly. I grinned in response.

"Bella, I'm sorry for everything. I will try to keep a level-head about this," he spoke in a soft voice. I could tell there was something else that he wasn't telling me. I cocked my head in confusion, asking him with my facial expression to continue. His grin grew, and a soft chuckle escaped his lips.

"It's just - you smell. Really, really bad."

I couldn't help but laugh, nodding my head. "Ditto."

Ignoring my foul stench, he reached forward for me again. I felt comfortable in this familiar embrace. Jacob really was my best friend. I didn't care if I was a vampire, and he was a werewolf. I didn't care if we were supposed to hate each other. I didn't give a damn. This was where Jake and I stood. _This was us_. He would always be a part of my life, and I didn't care what vampire had a problem with it.

"Am I interrupting something?"

Okay, I lied. I care about_ that _vampire.

I gave Jake another small smile, before backing away. I turned to look behind Jacob, where Edward and Alice stood. Alice brushed past him and moved to Jasper, giving him a small kiss, before turning to me again. Edward, however, remained on the porch behind Jacob. And if looks could kill, Jacob wouldn't have a head at the moment.

"I'll see you around, leech," he joked, before laughing at his own words. I grinned, and gave him a playful push out of the door. He stumbled down a few of the steps, and I winced. Oops. I listened as he mumbled something about my _stupid freaky strength _as his retreating figure disappeared through the green of the forest. I sighed, and my eyes shifted to Edward, who was glaring at me.

"Hi," I muttered pathetically. I closed the distance between us, wrapping my arms around his waist. He didn't respond. He left his arms hanging limp at his side, and his glare had moved down to the top of my head, which was the only part he could see of it at the moment. I inhaled his wonderful scent, bringing a smile upon my lips. Though patching some things up with Jacob was wonderful, his scent really was hard to endure. I was glad to have a distraction to my nostrils such as this. I pushed my face closer into Edward's side.

"I'm sorry."

Edward stiffened. One of his limp arms reached out and grasped the back of my head, cupping it there as his fingers moved expertly through my hair. I smiled again, and if it were possible, pushed myself even closer.

"What could you possibly be sorry for?"

"Um, well .. whatever I did to make you angry?" I guessed, though it sounded more like a question. His chest moved up and down as he laughed, and the sound vibrated through my entire body. I shuddered, but didn't release my lock on him.

"You're impossible, you silly girl," he said, giving me another chuckle. I looked up at him, frowning. He sighed. "I'm not angry at you. I'm just not very fond of you hugging a werewolf."

I nodded. Though I always believed his notions that the Quilete tribe was dangerous to me, I didn't argue. I had to fight it. The words were hanging on the very tip of my tongue, but I knew that if I allowed them to spill, I'd be in for a disastrous disagreement, and that was the last thing that I wanted at the moment. I wanted to declare my nature. I wanted to declare to him what I was, because for some reason, he didn't seem to understand. I was a _vampire_, for goodness sake. I was literally stronger than him. The over protectiveness was beginning to get frustrating.

"I'm fine. Hugging is harmless, you know?" I nudged him playfully, and he laughed. I smiled at the sound. It really was like music to my ears.

"Harmless? I beg to differ."

"What are you talking about? I'm perfectly fine! I had to watch myself so I wouldn't squeeze him too hard!" I exclaimed, and he chuckled at me. I was still confused. What harm could Jacob have possibly inflicted upon me? I looked down, re-assuring myself that all body parts were still in tact. Edward seemed to notice this, and laughed again, louder this time.

"He hasn't hurt you, it's just .." he began, and took a step away from me. My hands dropped to my side in deflation. I was frowning as I glared at him. "You really need to shower, love. It's hard to stand so close to you when you smell so horribly."

I grinned, feeling a huge weight lift off of my shoulder. He actually had me worried for a second. I crossed my arms over my chest, and feigned hurt. I made a small sound that resembled a _hmph_, and turned around.

"Nope. I think I'll walk around like this all day long!" I exclaimed loudly, and circled him. He was gazing at me, his eyes following as I walked in a circle. They were narrowing intensely with every step that I took. I could tell that all sense of playfulness had deteriorated. As I continued to rotate around him, he reached an arm out and grasped my hand, yanking me roughly toward his body. I hit his chest hard, but he didn't wince or grimace. His eyes were staring at me with such passion, that it surprised. Where had this come from?

"Do I have to _force_ you upstairs and into the shower myself?" he whispered huskily. I gulped, every trace of confidence dissolving. I shook my head, not sure what to say. This was a side of Edward that was very intimidating. But it didn't falter his beauty in any way. Standing there, eyes locked to mine, nostrils flaring in what I guessed was a burning pain in response to my stench, was actually quite .. sexy.

The hand that grasped mine let go, but moved behind my waist, to the small of my back. He pushed me closer to him. That's when I felt it. The intense passion that he must've been feeling as well. I would've been panting if I were human. This spontaneous moment of lust was enough to knock any human out. His hands moved up my back, massaging my spine in such a way that I had to control my eyes from rolling back into my head. The hand eventually moved to my face, where he cradled it against his palm.

His face moved down, and I felt his hot breath against my lips. My own parted, knowing exactly what they wanted. He moved quickly to give me what I wanted, when the door burst open. Jasper stood, heaving quietly.

"Please, for the love of all that's holy- go somewhere else! Your emotions are ridiculous!" he shouted loudly. I looked down in embarrassment and shame. If I were human, I would've been blushing for sure. I let myself feel the guilt, hoping that Jasper would understand I was sorry. While I continued to stare at the floor, Edward just laughed. Jasper rolled his eyes.

"Well thank you, Bella, for feeling at least some remorse for almost making me go crazy!" he snapped, before turning on his heel and leaving the room. The outburst made me laugh again, as the image of Jasper trying to be angry and intimidating popped up into my head again. He really was horrible at it. I was vaguely aware of anything at the moment, but when Carlisle stepped through the open door, I gasped.

It was incredible how being with Edward made me forget about anything and everything. Just standing there with him in such close proximity was enough to make me forget that my father was laying in the hospital with broken ribs. Which happened to be caused by a vampire that is part of a band of newborns that are sought to kill me by their sadistic leader, Victoria. Wow, what a life.

"How is he?" I asked nervously. Carlisle smiled.

"He's already awake and impatient about getting home. He asked if I could bring him a portable television. There's a game on tonight that he doesn't want to miss," he explained. I cracked a smile, finally feeling lighter about the situation. Though it was more my fault that Charlie was in the hospital, I felt comfortable that Carlisle was going to be checking in on him. Even if I was a failure at keeping Charlie safe, I knew I had a family that could.

"Bella!" I heard Alice gasp loudly from the kitchen. I stood, rooted the spot. I could hear her quick footsteps against the linoleum as she darted her way into the room. She looked at Carlisle, and then Edward, before her eyes landed on me. She took a breath, before her eyes shifted to Carlisle. I turned to look at Edward, who had already left the room. Something was wrong.

"Call Tanya. Ask them to come. The newborns are growing in numbers, and we only have days."

There it was again. The fear. The ridiculous, pathetic, self-conscious and terrifying raw fear.

"We're going to need all the help we can get."

* * *

**I'll admit, I'm not very fond of this chapter. I'm not sure why. But I've re-written it about three times, and finally, couldn't take it anymore. This was the end result, so I hope it's okay. Of course, it's going to get better. Tanya is coming! That makes great drama for me to write. Haha. :D Anyway, I hope you all had a wonderful Holiday! I sure did. I opened so many Twilight gifts, it was crazy. Not that I'm complaining, haha. And happy early New Years as well! Go out, party, have fun, whatever! Reviews make me smile, so please do so! :D**


	17. Rejected Heart Space

**Edward.**

_42 seconds._

I tipped my head at Alice, acknowledging her thoughts. I shifted my glance to Bella, who stood stiffly beside me. Her face was bright, almost excited looking, but I knew her well enough to see right through the facade. Moving my eyes further downward, I noticed her fingers were curled into tight fists, clenching and unclenching as the seconds ticked by. Her left foot was tapping impatiently against the cement of the porch, and she'd switch her weight every few seconds and tap with the other one. I sighed, and turned to look at Jasper.

_She's anxious, but mostly nervous. And a little bit afraid._

I frowned, and leaned closer to Bella, opening my mouth to whisper comforting words into her ear. Alice interrupted me, jumping from her seat on the porch railing. She extended her arm, lifting a finger to point at the silver Ferrari that was zooming around the curve of the road, slowing as it approached the house. If at all possible, Bella grew even more tense.

I positioned myself closer to her, trying to re-assure her that she was acting ridiculous. I knew that her main focus was on Tanya. She was convinced that they were engaged in some sort of competition for my affection, and despite the countless times I had promised Bella that there wasn't even a contest to begin with, she kept the crazy notion in her head.

She lifted her head to look up at me for a second, before a soft smile crept across her luscious lips. I grinned back, and she leaned against my figure. I lowered my head, and placed a soft kiss against the top of her head, enjoying the astonishing scent of Bella. She turned her attention back to the extravagant vehicle that was now pulling into the driveway, stopping just before the porch. I narrowed my eyes, noticing the familiar blonde that was sat in front of the steering wheel. She was grinning as she raised her hand and waved in my direction. Bella hissed.

They exited the car in synchronization, the doors closing shut in harmony. I counted as they approached the sidewalk leading to the entrance, and frowned. _I wonder where Irina is,_ Rosalie's thoughts mimicked my own. Well, this shortens our defense.

"Ah, Cullen's, it is lovely to see you again," Carmen greeted warmly, glancing over us all. Her eyes stopped on Bella, and noticing the body language between Bella and I, she grinned widely. _I've never seen him look so alive. _

"Likewise. You all look well, but if you don't mind me being so blunt, why isn't Irina joining us?" Esme inquired, clasping her hands together by her sides. Carmen threw a worried glance at Elezar, her gaze questioning. He grimaced, but nodded. He looked over at me, acknowledging that I could hear him. _We will discuss this later. _I nodded, and Carmen smiled gratefully at me.

"Now, who is this gorgeous creature beside Edward? I don't think we've had the pleasure of meeting," Elezar grinned, stepping forward. Bella softened in my embrace. I lowered my hand, wrapping it around her lower back and nudging her forward. She growled lowly at me, but I ignored it. Elezar reached for her hand, and she took it without hesitation, shaking it cautiously.

"I'm Bella. It's very nice to meet you," she greeted politely. The gasps from Kate and Tanya were not discreet. _Wasn't Bella the crazy human that he fled Forks over?_ I glared at Tanya, and she smiled sheepishly. She turned her gaze back to Bella, and moved to Elezar's side. I heard the intake of Bella's sharp breath as Tanya stood in front of her.

"Hello, Bella. I've certainly heard a lot about you. You've caused quite an uproar in the family, haven't you?" Tanya asked, laughing loudly. My eyes narrowed, my spiteful smile shifting into a glare. Bella giggled nervously, but threw me a frantic look. Tanya noticed. "Oh, I apologize! I'm Tanya, it's wonderful to finally meet you!"

Bella's lips curled into a smile, a gesture that I knew was forced, but I felt immense relief for the effort that she was giving. I watched carefully as Bella shook hands with Carmen and Kate, greeting them with hospitality. _I can't really describe how she feels right now. But she's very .. defeated. I think Tanya is intimidating to her. _I sighed, and decided to put her out of her misery.

Moving forward, I grasped Bella's hand and yanked her backwards. Her back collided with my chest, and I didn't waste any time in constricting my arms around her waist. I could feel the panic tingling on her body, but I didn't release her. I lowered my head, and opened my mouth once I reached her earlobe. She shuddered at the feel of my breath against her ear.

"Stop worrying, please? Tanya isn't formulating plots of destruction in her head. Her mind is very pleasant actually. Like I said, your fears are ludicrous."

She made a soft noise that resembled a _hmph_. I rolled my eyes, and pulled her closer to my body. _He looks so happy. _I moved my eyes in Tanya's direction, and smiled once at her, nodding my head. Her gaze diverted the ground for a second, before she caught mine again, and grinned. I took a breath. This was good.

Tanya and I didn't have enough of a relationship for her to consider Bella a threat. I wanted to laugh at the concept. Though there was once a time that Tanya's feelings for me weren't family related, and her thoughts about me _definitely_ weren't family related, I knew that was in the past. It would be completely ridiculous and immature for Tanya to feel threatened, because there was never a chance for her. Bella had my heart, my soul, my _everything_. Bella _was_ my everything.

Everybody moved into the living room. Esme had purchased a new couch for the occasion. It sat in one corner of the room, and formed an L shape as it curved onto a different side of the wall. It was big enough for the Denali clan to occupy, and as my own family gathered around the recliners and other couches, that's where they sat. Bella took a step towards the loveseat, expecting me to follow, but I plopped down onto one of the recliners. She turned around, and I watched as her face fell. I immediately felt guilty, and tilted my head back, signaling for her to come over. I grabbed her around the waist and pulled her onto my lap. She looked surprised for a moment, but a smile broke across her face.

* * *

**Bella.**

My eyes kept moving to look at Tanya. I couldn't help it. How was it possible for one person to be so inhumanely gorgeous? I mean, geesh, I knew that she was a vampire, but I felt like a dirty sock just sitting in the same room as her. Don't get me wrong, I still considered Rosalie to be the most beautiful woman in existence, but I think it was the fact that Tanya pined for Edward that got me in such a frenzy. It was either her or me, and it was certainly very obvious who was the beautiful one between the two of us.

I couldn't hear the conversations that were floating around me. Well, I _could_, but I didn't have the attention span to listen. I was vaguely aware that Esme and Carmen were chatting animatedly about home furnishing, and Emmett was arguing with Jasper about something that had been on television, but I stayed silent. I could feel eyes burning into the top of my head, and I looked up.

Tanya was staring at me. Her wide, golden eyes were narrowing as she looked at me curiously. I felt my insides deflate. She blinked once, and I groaned soundlessly. How could she even make blinking look graceful?

I crossed my arms over my chest, and lowered my head once more. My eyes were tracing the patterns of the wooden floor beneath us, when I felt Edward's breath at the base of my neck. I jumped at the feeling, and closed my eyes to stop them from rolling back in pleasure. He chuckled from under me, his body vibrating softly. He pressed his lips to my exposed collarbone, letting them linger as he moved upwards. I was shuddering with every kiss he left, my skin burning desperately from the contact. I let one of my hands tangle into his hair as he continue to kiss my neck, where my pulse once was.

I wanted to yell at him, scold him for behaving in such a crude manner in front of our guests, but I couldn't bring myself to stop him. It was so sickening how pleasurable his lips could be, and in this moment, I didn't care who was watching. I opened one eye, glancing shyly at Tanya. She was watching us, her face blank and void of any emotion. I wanted to smile at this. Though she was clearly the gorgeous one, Edward wasn't kissing _her _neck. He was with_ me_. Suddenly, all of my fears and ideas seemed incredibly immature and childish.

Edward moved his lips to my chin, just below my lips. I grinned, and bit back the giggle that I was tempted to release. I opened my other eye, moving to look at Jasper. He was staring at us with an amused face. Once Edward moved back down to my neck, I mouthed the word 'sorry' to him, and he broke out into a wide grin, shaking his head relentlessly.

Edward's lips suddenly stopped, and I frowned from the loss of contact. Emmett began laughing, obviously noticing my crestfallen face, and I growled sharply at him. His laughter increased, but Carlisle quickly scolded him and requested that he be quiet.

"I've discussed this with you over the telephone, but I must re-address the matter. Victoria is building an army of newborn vampires. Right now, Alice can see at least fifteen of them. She sees more in the future as well. You've already accepted our favor to fight with us, but I will understand if you wish to withdrawal," Carlisle announced, glancing nervously at the family of four that sat on the new couch. Carmen smiled.

"You are all family. Of course we will fight. That is final."

I smiled. The woman reminded me so much of Esme, but she had her own warmness to her. It was comforting, like a mother, just as Esme's. But she had a certain aura of happiness that was so contagious, that I found myself smiling with her for no reasons at all sometimes.

"Thank you. We appreciate it. Now, we've all been merely curious. Is there something wrong with Irina?"

Kate sighed, scowling as she shared a look with Tanya, before glaring down at the floor.

"She hasn't been very well lately, since the death of her mate, Laurent. I'm sure Bella remembers him," Kate explained, throwing an odd look at me. I stiffened, and tried to read her expression. "She wouldn't be much help in a fight. And I am actually quite glad she decided not to join us. I don't think she would've reacted to your new family addition quite as well as we did."

Edward tensed, and I could feel the anger radiating off of him.

"Are you hinting that Bella is to blame for Laurent's death?" he spat angrily. Kate's eyes widened in realization. I was about to ask Edward to calm down, but I figured that her thoughts about me weren't very nice. Oh, well. She was bringing it upon herself. The wrath of Edward Cullen was not something pretty.

"If you think about it, in a way, it is," Tanya replied coolly. I stared at her with disbelieving eyes. Edward jumped up, and I almost slid off of the chair, but he caught me, grabbing my elbow and pulling me up. "Not that he didn't deserve it, because he most definitely did. I was just making a point," she concluded. Her face remained calm as she gazed at Edward. Was it not a big deal to her that they were blaming me for her sister's depression?

"Maybe your sister should've found somebody with a little more self-control," I muttered, re-calling the hungry look in Laurent's eyes as he neared me in the meadow. I shuddered at the memory.

Suddenly, I was thrown backwards. Edward was crouching protectively in front of me, snarling at the blonde vampire that was towering angrily in front of him. She was hissing at me, trying to push through Edward to get to me. I sat, wide-eyed on the ground, staring at her in awe. Alice quickly moved to my side, helping me up and moving me away from the livid vampire.

"Kate, please, calm yourself!" Tanya was shouting, grabbing her sister around the shoulders to pull her back. Kate pointed a finger in my direction, still struggling against Carmen and Tanya's hold.

"You shut your mouth about my sister. You don't know anything about her!"

I was so confused, so shocked, so afraid and so embarrassed. I knew I had a big mouth, and I knew I could be sarcastic sometimes, but I didn't think my comment had been so spiteful that she would want to attack me. I gulped, a string of word vomit creeping up my throat. There were so many things I wanted to apologize for.

"Kate, Tanya, I'm so sorry, I really didn't mean-" I began, struggling to find the voice. Kate's angry snarl cut me off, and I backed up into Alice's embrace in shock. Her black eyes narrowed.

"I refuse to fight for_ her_. If it were for the benefit of any other Cullen, I would do it in a heartbeat. But not her. She's not family," she snapped, before her eyes moved to the heart-shaped crest that lay around my neck. The words hurt me probably a lot more than they should've. I didn't know her enough to call her a friend. She was merely a stranger at this point, but the words cut me in half. Even if I didn't know her, I knew that she was special to my family, which opened up a space in my heart for her. Even a space for Tanya, but apparently, it wasn't wanted.

"Kate, please be reasonable. It is for the benefit of us. There's a chance we'll be harmed if .." Esme's pleas were drowned by my sudden anxiety. I was aware that Alice was whispering something into my ear, but I couldn't hear.

"I tried to apologize .." I moaned miserably, but it probably sounded like a sob. Alice's hand was moving down my forearm, rubbing it in a comforting gesture. She placed a hand on my shoulder, and pushed me backwards until I was in the kitchen. Suddenly, I was in Edward's arms.

"Edward, I'm so sorry! I really didn't mean to be so horrible! It was so wrong of me and-"

"Bella, you have absolutely nothing to be sorry for. She doesn't deserve your apology. In her mind, she was blaming you. She was blaming you for her sister's loss!" he yelled, the outrage evident in his voice. I winced, knowing that Kate would be able to hear him from the living room. He didn't seem to mind. I shook my head.

"But she's your family, and she's right. If it weren't for me-"

"No. No, no, no!" he bellowed. I stared up at him with wide eyes, not able to speak. "He was going to kill you, Bella. He was going to take you away from me. I'm so grateful that the wolves interceded when they did. I will _never_ be able to explain the immense gratitude I hold to them, for saving your life. And if he escaped, even after leaving you unharmed, I would've hunted him down and killed him anyway, for even _considering_ taking your life."

I couldn't speak. My throat suddenly felt dry, and all I could do was nod. His angry lips turned into a soft smile, and he leaned down.

"Don't you listen to a word she says, okay?" he asked, pressing his forehead against mine. I still couldn't speak, so I just nodded. "Good girl."

His lips were suddenly against mine. I marveled at the sensation that seemed to shake my bones. It was the first time that we had kissed since the day that we pushed our limits, taking it almost too far. It was amazing that I could withstand days without his kisses. I clutched the back of his neck, rising up on my tip-toes to return the passion. He chuckled against my lips, and wrapped an arm around my lower back, lifting me slightly. My feet were no longer touching the ground, dangling just a few inches above the floor.

His lips weren't hungry or eager, which was something that I appreciated. His tongue spoke words without talking as it entered my mouth. They were words of re-assurance, comfort and belonging. His free hand clutched the left side of my face, and I smiled when I felt his thumb trace fingers against my cheekbone. He felt the action, and smiled against my own lips, breaking apart for a moment.

"Do you have any idea how hard it is to fight the urge to do that every moment of the day?" he whispered huskily. I laughed, my forehead against his again. I was back on my feet, but stretching to meet his lowered neck.

"Why fight it? I'm not protesting," I retorted, pressing my lips to the smooth skin on his cheek. He grinned, and enveloped me into his arms. Everything went out the window for the moment. All that mattered was Edward, and I loved that he could do this to me. That he could do this for me. I knew his anger was probably out of control, but he found it in himself to calm down and make me forget about everything.

I forgot about the fact that my father was in the hospital, that a crazy vampire was creating an army against my family, and that my mouth had just caused me to lose a potential friend. I forgot everything that didn't involve my love for Edward.

* * *

**Edward.**

Once I was positive that Tanya had escorted Kate out of the house, and into the forest to hunt, I led Bella back into the living room. I could tell by her body movements that she was still greatly upset and ashamed over what had happened, though she had absolutely no reason to. Carmen and Elezar wore concerned faces as they watched Bella enter the room. Esme was the first to rise, engulfing Bella in a hug.

"Don't you feel sorry, dear. You have nothing to feel sorry for, okay?" I heard her whisper gently into Bella's ear. She nodded, and returned to my side. She followed me back to the recliner, and we took our previous positions. Carlisle opened his mouth to start explaining more details about Victoria, but Bella took us all by surprise by speaking instead.

"I know you said that I don't have anything to apologize for, but I can't help but feel that my big mouth might've caused such a huge problem. I don't want to cause trouble in the family. I don't want to be a nuisance-"

"Bella, stop it. You are family," Rosalie scorned her, and I nodded furiously in agreement. She sighed, and diverted her gaze to her lap, where her hands lay. I reached around her waist, and grabbed them. She tilted her head back a bit, and I pressed my lips against her cheek. She leaned closer to me, her lips suddenly at the side of my head, reaching my ear. I bit my lip to stop from groaning.

"Edward," she whispered so softly that I would only hear. "I cost us the loss of another fighter. What are we going to do? Our numbers are too small compared to Victoria's," she questioned. The fear and dread in her voice was tearing at me, and I wished I could just eliminate every person that ever even _thought_ of harming my Bella with just a snap of my finger. If only it could be that easy.

I closed my eyes, suddenly seeing flashes of brown fur, narrowed alignment of teeth and huge paws. I suppressed a heavy sigh, and ran a hand over my face. This was absurd, but it just might work.

"Don't worry about it. I have a plan," I whispered in a finalized tone.

Exactly _what_ was I getting myself into?

* * *

**Don't hate me! I know it's been forever since I've updated, but I've been incredibly busy! But since Holidays and my birthday have passed, my head is totally in the game now, haha. So, I absolutely_ had _to create a rivalry between one of the Denali's and Bella, but I didn't say it would Tanya. ;] I love switching things up, though. Making Tanya and Bella fight would be way too used, you know? Anyway, I've added a picture on my homepage to who/what Tanya looks like (Until she appears in one of the movies) I've photoshopped the picture and everything, since she's normally ridiculously tanned, haha. You don't have to picture her like that, but that's what _I _see her as. Anyway, let me know what you think of this chapter! Hopefully I didn't disappoint. I tried really hard with this one seeing as the last one was kind of a fail, haha. Thanks! :D**


	18. His Plan & Her Battle

**Bella.**

Edward had a plan. What it was, I had yet to discover. Alice was the only person that knew of his decisions, only because she could see every single one he makes. They both seemed incredibly on edge about it, talking in hushed tones and arguing over little things whenever they believed to be out of earshot. Though I tried constantly to be sneaky, I was always only able to catch the end of their secret discussions.

The house was louder than usual, with the addition of Carmen and Elezar. They had decided to stay with us, going against Kate's preferences, and fighting alongside my family. I couldn't express just how grateful I was to them. I was still sketchy about Tanya. Though my head still screamed with jealousy over the blonde vampire, she _was _a lot more pleasant than her sister. She and Kate had rented a room at a hotel in Seattle, after Carmen and Elezar had persuaded Kate to be reasonable and stay within the state. She kept her distance, and I was extremely glad for that.

To summarize, the past few days were tolerable. I was still apprehensive and nervous about the future battle with Victoria's army, and how could I not be? I didn't have any of the details, because Edward and Alice refused to enclose them with me. That simple non-gesture had left me in a very foul mood. I was a vampire, and if anything, this was my battle. She was doing this because of me. Their ridiculous secrets were causing layers of fear to build against my impenetrable skin. The smallest thing would cause an overreaction from me.

Which is why my head was continuously listing off the pessimistic possibilities of why Edward was dragging me to the clearing. The rest of the family, including Carmen and Elezar, followed behind us, only adding more tension onto my shoulders. His grip was tight against my wrist, and despite my rough yanks, I couldn't pull myself free.

"Damnit, Edward. If you value my sanity in the least, you will tell me what's going on!" I screamed in protest as we scaled the forest quickly. He threw his head back to look at me. His golden eyes were amused, his lips pursed tight. He was fighting _laughter_.

I hissed sharply between my gritted teeth, proving my anger. He couldn't contain himself as his mouth opened, and he laughed loudly. Though the musical sound threw a pleasant chill down my bones, I was still angry. And since he wasn't understanding just _how_ angry I was, I wanted to _show_ him. I quickly adjusted my arm that he had a hold of, and his fingers slid to mine. I grasped them tightly, not easing up until I heard a whimper of pain. He pulled his hand back, and glared at me.

"That was unnecessary."

I rolled my eyes.

"And so is this," I muttered, throwing my eyes to the group of vampires following us. "I just want to know what's going on. For once, I'm strong enough to fight my own battles, and you're not letting me."

His face softened, and he released my hand. I looked around, noticing that we were already standing out in the open. He sighed, and dropped his forehead onto my shoulder. Though my fingers were twitching, wanting so desperately to touch him, I resisted.

"I'm sorry, love. It's just .. I don't like picturing you in battle. I don't like the idea of you possibly getting hurt. It drives me crazy," he confessed, and I sighed in return. I dropped my guard, and almost immediately, my arms wound around his torso. I dug my face into his neck, not quite tall enough to reach his face without standing on my tip-toes. I pressed a chaste kiss to his jugular.

"I'm stronger than you think, Edward. You just have to have faith," I whispered, pressing another soft kiss to his neck, before forcefully pulling myself away from his comforting body. He spoke no words, but the gentle nod of his head and gleam in his eye let me know that he was sorry.

"Now," I began, hoping the fresh vulnerability would win me some answers. "What is this plan that you've been hiding?"

He smiled once, and my eyebrows rose expectantly. I turned, noticing the rest of the family lining up behind us. I squinted in confusion, studying each vampire with curiosity. They were preparing for something. Something that they knew, and I didn't. I gasped in realization, and emitted a sharp groan. I half-stepped away from Edward, and he chuckled at me.

"I had good reason to disclose this information from you. You would've protested, but no worries, you're about to find out," he explained. I opened my mouth, prepared to argue, when I inhaled the disgusting scent of werewolf. My eyes widened, and my neck snapped in the other direction. The smell was growing stronger, as noises in the distance trees grew louder.

"Disgusting," I heard Carmen whimper as she scrunched her nose in disapproval. I gulped, awaiting the entrance of the wolves. To say that I was terrified would be an understatement. Had the wolves decided upon war? Was this what Edward and Alice keeping from me? That I would have to fight and kill people that I once called my _friends_?

I didn't realize I was shaking until Edward placed a hand on my shoulder. I looked up at him quickly, hoping that the few short seconds we'd get would be enough for him to explain what the hell was going on. He shook his head, but the smile never left his face. I wanted to scream at him. We were going to battle, and he was_ smiling_?

I didn't get a chance to ponder my new insecurities, as the first wolf emerged from the trees. He was large, with shaggy black fur that seemed to flop with his every step. I gulped, taking a step back. It had been awhile since I had seen any of the Quilete boys in wolf form. The second wolf followed gracefully behind, and I quickly recognized the dark russet color fur. It was Jacob. Soon after that, more wolves began to descend. I was amazed at the numbers of them.

"I'm going to be the translator for the evening," Edward announced once the wolves were lined up opposite of us. I was trembling with fear, still unsure of the situation. My eyes switched from Edward, to the wolf that was Jacob, and then back to Edward. Jasper, who was obviously aware of my strong feelings, coughed loudly. Edward's stern face softened, and he smiled in my direction.

"There will be no battle tonight, love. Please stop freaking out, you're overwhelming Jasper," he spoke quietly to me. A flood of relief washed over me, but all I could do was nod. The fear was quickly replaced by a strong curiosity, and though I wanted to scream a million questions at Edward, I kept quiet and allowed the scene to unfold in front of me.

Carlisle was the first to step forward, nodding his head politely at the wolves. Some of their own heads tipped forward, but for the most part, they remained as still as statues.

"I'm sure you've heard the entire story from Edward. We just wanted to gather you to get a feel for our alliance. We won't waste time on the details. We're all very well informed of the story here," Carlisle explained, and I couldn't help but let out a sarcastic snort. He ignored me, and turned his gaze to Edward, who was watching one of the wolves carefully.

"We lack the proper knowledge of vampires that may be a necessity to killing them. If there is a proper way of killing one, we're going to need to know," Edward announced in a hollow voice. Carlisle nodded, before tipping his head toward Jasper.

"Jasper will be teaching us various techniques. He's the most experienced in this situation."

I rocked back on my heels, listening intently to every word they were saying. But as my brain slowly processed every sentence that had just been spoken, I realized what was going on. The wolves were fighting with us. They were risking their lives, and_ fighting with us_.

"No!"

I couldn't help my outburst, as I jumped forward quickly. Edward was at my side instantly, gripping one of my forearms and staring at me in concern. He was whispering in a hushed tone, asking questions too quickly for me to comprehend.

"You can't ask them to fight with us! I don't want them risking their lives because of me!" I shouted angrily. He winced, and his face turned to the ground. Carlisle sighed loudly, but that only added my anger. A few of the wolves were cackling, and I could hear the taunting in their loud barks. I growled loudly. Didn't they understand that this was dangerous?

"Bella, they're more than capable-" Edward began, but I shook my head furiously. I turned my head to large one who stood in front. He was staring quietly at me, his body moving with every deep breath that he took.

"Sam," I cooed softly, addressing him by his first name. "You don't have to do this. It's entirely too dangerous. This isn't something that you should be involving yourselves in. I could never forgive myself in any one of you get hurt."

We gazed at each other for a long period of time. I suddenly wished I was the mind-reader in the family, though Edward was being a very terrible translator at the moment. His gaze never faltered as he stared at me. I felt the layers of anticipating and anger breaking down as this mysterious wolf eyed me intently. I sighed, finally breaking the moment and glaring at the dead grass below my feet.

"Bella, they're not doing this for _you_," Edward suddenly explained. I winced from the harshness of the sentence. "They're doing it for the town. They have a duty to protect Forks, and they feel that helping is very necessary."

I was silent, but nodded. Edward laughed suddenly.

"And Jacob would like to throw in that _he's_ mainly doing this for you." I turned to the russet wolf, and grinned, my sour mood suddenly lifted. I sighed in defeat. When had I ever gotten my way when it came to these creatures? You'd think I'd be used to the disappointment by now. I nodded, causing Jacob to bark happily.

"Now that Bella's done being stupid, can we actually learn something?" Emmett whined loudly from his place in line. I scowled at him, but laughed when Rosalie rolled her eyes and jabbed an elbow into his stomach. He groaned with a loud _umph_, and closed his mouth for the time being.

"They want to reschedule this for tomorrow. They've got a few things to take care of back at La Push," Edward said. Carlisle nodded, smiling politely.

"Of course. What time would you like to meet?"

"Ten is good for us as well. We will see you tomorrow," Edward announced, before turning his back on the wolves. I sighed, feeling the nervousness of the meeting drift off of me. Edward jerked his head backwards, motioning for me to return to his side, and I moved to happily oblige, when the putrid odor of the wolves grew unbearably close. The next thing I knew, my face was planted firmly in the dirt, and something cold was nudging my cheeks.

"Get off of her!" I heard Edward snarl. I looked up, confused at what was going on, but gasped when I saw Jacob on top of me. He was barking loudly, his large lips curled into a happy grin. I turned to glance at Edward, who was stomping angrily towards the large wolf. I couldn't help it. I laughed.

"Bella, are you okay?" Edward asked gently, kneeling down to my side. He threw another harsh glance at Jacob, and muttered for him to move or he'd snap his legs. I try to speak, but I was overcome a strong case of the giggles. Jacob's soft fur tickled my face as his tongue lapped at my cheeks, and through my laughter, I groaned.

"Ew, gross, Jake! Get off of me!" I whined. He barked again, but moved himself off of me. I took a step toward Edward, but he grimaced. I sighed, and rolled my eyes.

"Thanks Jake," I muttered, leaning closer to the jubilant wolf. "He won't be kissing me anytime soon."

Edward laughed, Jacob barked, and I grinned. This was a good feeling.

* * *

**Edward.**

"So, explain to me why you couldn't fill me in of this plan before we met the wolves?" Bella asked curiously, as she threw herself onto the large bed. The majority of the room had been packed into cardboard boxes, but we would have to have the bed shipped to our new home. The gold comforter swirled around her body, making her skin glow brighter than it already did.

I extended an arm, folding some boxes close. I sighed, and snuck another glance at her. She was still staring.

"Remember that little fit you had earlier?" I asked, knowing that she would acknowledge exactly what I was referring to. She pursed her lips for a moment, a gesture that drove me crazy with desire to kiss her, and hummed a soft _hmm_.

"Yes."

"I was trying to avoid that. I figured you had too much pride to burst in front of the wolves," I explained, and threw her a sheepish smile. Her eyes, which were quickly diluting to a soft orange, widened for a second. Then, her eyebrows burrowed and she scowled at me.

"A lot of good that did," she mumbled, tilting her head to look down at the comforter. I took this opportunity to study her. Her soft brown hair, which was still damp from the shower she had just taken, hung in loose ringlets around her shoulders. She was clad only in an oversized Forks gym t-shirt, and a pair flannel shorts. It amused me greatly that she still dressed as if she were going to sleep, but I respected it. She looked beautiful regardless.

I closed another box, securing it with a layer of duct tape, before gently dropping it to the ground.

"Edward?" she asked softly.

"Yes, love?"

"Are we still going to live in Alaska?" she inquired, her voice gentle as if she were asking a dangerous question. I chuckled once, and nodded my head. I recognized my mistake, forgetting that she wasn't looking up at me.

"Of course," I answered confidently. She sighed, and tilted her head to stare up at me.

"Even after I went and opened my big mouth? It's enough that Kate already hates me, but apparently Irina, and-" By this point, I had dropped the box I was currently packing, which consisted of the insides of my top dresser. The items clattered noisily to the floor, but I ignored the sound as I moved to Bella, and clamped a hand firmly over her mouth.

"I thought we agreed that you wouldn't blame yourself for that," I scolded. She huffed against my hand. "To put an end to your constant worries, we won't be living with them. Esme has hired an interior designer who is currently working on the house as we speak. It'll be done by the time we get up there."

She exhaled a breath, and I smiled softly at her. I removed my hand from her mouth, and let it trace the pale skin of her face. My fingers moved to her cheekbone, my thumb rubbing across it once before traveling down to her bottom lip. I grinned when I saw her eyes close, and I continued to massage her face. She took me surprise though, when she urgently gripped my face and crushed her lips to mine.

My lips folded upwards against her, and I chuckled against her kiss. She pulled away for a second, giggling breathlessly as her orange eyes gazed up into my own, before she moved in to kiss me again. I waited for the impact, but unfortunately, it never came. I opened my eyes to look at her, but her eyes were focused on something on the floor beside the bed.

Before I could notice anything, she was leaning down to retrieve the item. She held it between her fingers, before looking up at me. I turned to see what it was, and when I did, I gasped. My surprised reaction must've fueled her curiosity, because her fingers quickly snapped the box open. I groaned.

She had found the ring.

Oh, hell.

* * *

**Let me apologize for not only the short length of the chapter, but the delayed update! I had a huge case of writers block. I know exactly what I want for this story, but it's getting my words out that makes it a bit difficult sometimes. It's weird that I find writing at 4 AM the best though. I produce better quality chapters when I'm sleepy, I guess. Haha. I'm trying to push the plot a lot faster. I don't want to write anything pointless, which I find I do a lot. But I hope this chapter is okay. I'm actually quite satisfied with it. Anyway, more reviews would be lovely! I love hearing what you guys think, so don't be shy! :D**


	19. The Vintage Beauty

**Bella.**

His gasp of surprise was what triggered the spark of curiosity within me. Edward was usually so composed, but now, as my fingers pried open the small velvet box, he was a mess. The grimace was apparent on his flawless face, his eyes half squinted in apprehension. I glanced down to look at the object that had him acting so oddly. Obviously, it was a piece of jewelry. I didn't know what else ring boxes could be used to hold, but the look on his face was frightening me. Maybe it wasn't a ring. Maybe it was something that I wasn't meant to see, or-

Scratch that. It was a ring.

I raised my eyebrows, my confusion raising by the second. The gold ring was wedged into the blue silk in the center of the box. It was _gorgeous_. I wasn't the type of girl that appreciated jewelry as much as Alice and Rosalie did, but this just had a certain sparkle and beauty to it. It's face was oval shaped, sheltering thirteen perfect twinkling diamonds. They captivated me, holding my gaze as I ogled it's beauty. Besides my crest, this had to be the most marvelous piece of jewelry ever made.

But why did Edward have it?

I gulped. Maybe I didn't want to know the answer to that. Maybe this ring belonged to .. somebody else. Maybe it .. wasn't my business. Realizing that I was being incredibly rude and nosy, I snapped the box shut and shoved it into Edward's hands. He looked confused as he stared up at me, his mouth opening slightly in wonder. I sighed, and gave him a soft smile.

"You never cease to surprise me, Bella."

I cocked my head to the side, not quite following his statement. He laughed once, and I could hear the nervousness that swallowed it whole. Edward Cullen was nervous. Well, this wasn't something that happened very often. This must be very, very bad. He sighed, holding the blue velvet box in his left hand, his thumb gently stroking the soft texture.

"You aren't .." he fumbled, pursing his lips to find the words to finish. "You aren't .. angry about this?"

Everything inside of me dropped. I was supposed to be angry? I was supposed to harbor feelings of anger towards the breathtaking ring that sat in that box. I gulped, trying to gain composure of myself before I let any trace of fright appear on my face. I inhaled a sharp breath, forced a dim smile and shook my head innocently.

"Should I be?" I asked, making sure my tone was nothing short of curious. He shrugged his shoulders, his glorious eyes drifting to the box once more. I lowered my head, not allowing him to see the cringe that was forming on my face. Though it was an astonishing ring, it was quickly becoming the object of my hatred. There was something about it that was making Edward distant, and I had just spent the past few weeks breaking him out of that.

"Well, under any normal circumstance, you would be."

I exhaled the shaky breath that I wasn't aware I was holding in. If my heart wasn't still, it'd be plummeting down to my knees at this very second. I pressed my lips together, trying to form a decent way to appear mature in this situation.

"What you did in your past doesn't concern me. It doesn't matter to me who that belongs to," I announced proudly, tilting my head up. I was shocked with myself that I had enough dignity to let myself sound so assured, but in reality, I was over-analyzing the situation with fury. He had told me that he's never been with anyone else before me. He had told me that I was his first love, but here he sat, nervously holding a ring that could possibly belong to an elephant sized lie.

Suddenly, his fingers were on my chin, and he pried my face up to meet his gaze. I tried to focus on anything but him, but his fingers moved my chin until I had no choice but to stare at his golden eyes. He gazed for what seemed like minutes, as if he were searching for something, before his eyes widened and he snapped back in shock. His hand never left my face.

"Isabella Marie Swan," he scolded, his voice cold. "Do you believe that this ring belongs to another _woman_?"

I stared, mouth open and eyes wide. I let my jaw drop a few times, trying to push the strength to talk, but the glare in his eyes was so heavy that I was beat. I sighed dramatically, and finally looked down, breaking his gaze. His hand pushed my chin up once more, and he raised his eyebrows in expectation of my answer.

"Well.. doesn't it?" I mumbled pathetically.

"Oh, Bella," he sighed breathlessly. "How many times have I told you that you're the only one who has ever touched my heart?"

"You might have mentioned it a few times."

His hand released the grip on my jaw, and moved gracefully over my cheek, holding it gently. I relished in the feel of his fingers expertly stroking my skin, and I closed my eyes. His leaned his face closer, an amused smile plastered on his face. I could tell that he was trying to hold his laughter in, but once I frowned, he couldn't contain it any longer. He let out a long, musical laugh.

"This was the ring that my father gave to my mother. It belongs to her," he explained once his laughter died.

The idiocy of the situation hit me like a ton of bricks. I wanted to have tear ducts again so I could cry in embarrassment. It was such a simple solution. It was the first solution that should've came to my mind, considering the vintage appeal to the ring. How could I have lost so much faith in Edward? I was positive that my trust was completely restored in him. I was positive that we were past all that had happened between us, but the first chance I got, I doubted his loyalty to me. I was truly unbelievable.

I let out a frustrated cry, and lowered my face into my hands. Edward chuckled once from beside me, but grasped one of my hands, pulling it away. Through my uncovered eye, I saw him gazing at me with concern.

"What's wrong, love?"

"I'm horrible, Edward! I'm so sorry! I can't believe that I doubted you! I honestly- I thought that maybe you lied to me and-" I couldn't continue. Even as I explained my reasoning for my reaction, the words seemed to fuel even more humiliation from me. If that was even possible.

Edward's hand released mine, and he pressed it softly to the back of my head. He pushed gently, until my head found the soft contours of his shoulder. I immediately inhaled his scent, finding comfort in the alluring fragrance that always left me happy. He laughed again, the sound vibrating and shaking his entire body. I shuddered involuntarily, but didn't move my head away.

"You're not horrible, Bella. It was an easy assumption to make. I guess I _was_ acting a tad bit nervous."

"A tad? Edward, if it were possible, you looked as if you'd vomit," I joked, trying to push my previous humiliation aside._ I _wanted to vomit from my recent behavior. "Why would I be angry over the ring if it belonged to your mother?"

The question popped out of my mouth, but I didn't forget the curiosity that grew within me once I opened the small box. If it didn't belong to another woman, and Edward never loved anybody but me, what reason would I possibly have for getting upset over a_ ring_?

Oh. Oh._ Oh!_

Holy crow! _Now_ I knew why he was acting so nervous. _Now_ I knew why I was supposed to be angry and freak out.

"Th-the ring is mine?" I asked weakly. He smiled sheepishly, but sighed heavily, surrendering with a nod of his head.

"If you want it, that is."

I was stunned. I was completely speechless. He was planning on proposing to me. He was giving me this ring- this gorgeous, perfectly beautiful ring that had once laid upon the hand of his very own mother. He was giving it to me. He wanted to _marry _me. I gulped, not quite sure how to react to this. One half of me was numb with happiness. An existence as Edward Cullen's wife? Nothing would get better than that. But the other half of me was screaming in protest. Maybe this was too soon. Maybe we weren't completely healed for us to take this step.

But when the hell had he even proposed? It was my stupid curiosity that led me to the ring. He was probably waiting, and I ruined it. Way to go, Bella.

"I'm sorry, Edward. You were probably waiting to ask."

He smiled, flashing me his perfect alignment of teeth. I melted at the sight of the crooked grin that I loved so much. He held the ring in one hand, and stood, his face growing serious.

"Yes, I was."

I nodded. I understood, but I would be lying if I said I wasn't disappointed. I rose up off of the bed, straightening out my clothes before I moved towards the door. I vaguely remembered something about Rosalie telling me she'd be in the garage if I wanted to learn a bit more about cars. The Cullen family were big on them, and since Emmett and Jasper were insisting that I have one, I wanted to know a bit more.

I felt Edward's hand grip my wrist, and I turned around. I gasped.

He was on one knee.

If the situation wasn't already enough, I felt butterflies in my stomach. As cheesy as that sounded, they were there. They were moving so quickly, jumbling around as I watched him grin up at me, his lips folded into a genuine smile. His topaz eyes never seemed so bright before as they watched mine. I gulped, watching silently as he reached for one of my hands, holding it with both of his.

"Isabella Swan, I promise to love you forever- every single day of forever. Will you marry me?"

There were so many things that I wanted to say right now. I wanted to yell at him for putting me in this position, I wanted to kiss him for putting me in this position. I wanted .. well, I knew what I wanted. But was it what we _needed_? Was this too soon? After everything we've been through, and with everything we're about to go through, how did I know if accepting his marriage proposal was the right thing to do?

I heard Edward suck in a sharp breath, and I gazed down at him. The brightness in his eyes had faltered, along with the grin. I didn't realize I had been silent, keeping him waiting. He must've thought I was going to deny him.

I bit my lip, trying to decide. With one more glance at his crest-fallen face, I had my answer.

Screw doing the_ right _thing.

"Yes," I breathed out. He sat perfectly still for a moment, as if he was trying to process the small word into his brain. It took him a moment before he realized my answer, and his eyes jumped back to mine. I decided that he needed re-assurance.

"Yes, Edward, I'll marry you."

He stared at me for another long moment, before jumping to his feet and engulfing me in his arms. I felt his strong hand at my chin again, and before I had time to question his actions, his lips were pressed hard against mine.

It was the most amazing kiss he had ever given me. It was quick, but deep enough to express the love that he felt for me. I responded eagerly, moving my lips against his in perfect synchronization. I felt tingles at my toes, as ridiculous as that sounded. But they were there, and they lingered on my skin, making me move myself closer to Edward. I wanted my_ entire _body to tingle like that, and I knew he could do that to me.

He pulled away after a few seconds, leaning his forehead against mine. He smiled softly at me, and I returned it. I wasn't looking, but I felt him grab my left hand gently. I kept my eyes on his, but the butterflies grew stronger when I felt the cool stone of the ring brush against my finger. It applied a small amount of pressure, but it felt perfect. It fit perfect, as if it were made to live on that finger.

"I love you," he whispered softly.

I sighed happily. If I were human, this moment would've been unappreciated and embarrassing. I would've made a fuss over it. I would've scolded Edward for being so cheesy and awkward. But I wasn't human, and I had had two painful experiences where I had lived without Edward. I had developed a strong sense of maturity, and as I watched this scene unfold in front of me, I saw it for what it was- love.

"I love you too."

He leaned down, and I met his lips halfway. I don't know where it had come from, but a sudden urgency was burning in the depths of my stomach. The poor butterflies that had been causing my body so much turmoil were most likely fried to a crisp right now, because the fire that ignited was something that scorched throughout my very presence. I reached up and gripped the back of his neck, attempting to pull him even closer to me.

* * *

**Edward.**

I was engaged to Bella Swan. I was going to marry the most beautiful woman in the universe. We were going to live together for the rest of existence, and we were going to be happy. There wasn't going to be a single thing that tore us apart again. It was my happiness that assured me that Victoria's army wasn't going to stand a chance against us, because I wasn't going to let anything happen to my fiancée.

And it must've been my happiness that also led me to this sudden desire to ravish Bella.

As she wrapped her small arms around my neck, I felt her desire as well. Our lips moved quickly and hungrily together, our tongues dancing in perfect rhythm. When I heard Bella emit a low moan, something inside of me triggered.

With a deep growl building in my chest, I lowered her to bed, pushing her a bit more roughly than I normally would've. She didn't mind. She giggled as she released her lips from mine, before locking her long legs around my hips and moving back in to attack my lips once more. My fingers curled into fists against her sides as my anatomy suddenly awakened.

Her tongue ran along my bottom lip, before she drew it into her mouth, sucking lightly. I closed my eyes in pleasure. If this was just _kissing_ her, I couldn't imagine what sex would feel like.

And as much as I hated it, I wouldn't have the delight of experiencing that pleasure right now. I pulled my face back, meeting Bella's confused gaze. I smiled at the sight of her damp, untamed hair and swollen lips. I raised my fingers, smoothing out pieces of wild hair that fell into her face.

"How objective are you against waiting until_ after _we're married?"

She groaned, tilting her head up to look at the ceiling. I immediately seized the opportunity, and tucked my face into the crook of her neck. I let my lips wander along her shoulder blade, all the way up to her jaw. She whimpered a bit, before lowering her head and meeting my eyes once more.

"Clearly, you weren't born in this era," she muttered sarcastically, and I knew she was referring to my preference to wait until marriage to have sex. I grinned sheepishly, and leaned down to kiss her neck once more. She moaned softly. "Well, if you keep doing _that_, I'm going to be very objective."

I laughed, and got off of her, sitting upright. She mirrored my actions, leaning her head against my shoulder. She held her left hand out in front of us, her fingers spreading so we could appreciate the view. And I did.

I always used to stare at the ring. Though it was clearly beautiful, it was always missing something. I knew it always belonged to Bella. It belonged to her since the moment I laid eyes upon her, but there was always a void in it's beauty. But now, seeing it on Bella's hand, I realized that the void was _Bella_. It wasn't completely beautiful until it was attached to the picture perfect image of beauty itself.

I grinned, and reached for the hand that was displayed in front of us. I entwined my fingers with hers, and kissed each of them, letting my lips linger on her ring finger. I sighed in happiness.

Victoria, Kate, the newborns, the Volturi- they could all come right now, and they wouldn't harm us. What we had was indestructible, and I laughed at anybody who thought they could even _touch _us right now.

* * *

**Eek, I apologize for another delay- though this time, it wasn't my fault. This chapter has actually been done for a few days now, but my internet has been very scratchy lately, and each time I tried uploading, it failed. But anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter! I'm actually quite fond of it. Though there's not much action, I think that's a good thing. We all need a mushy Bella/Edward break sometimes, haha. And I've added pictures of Kate and Irina on my website as well, so if you want, you can go check that out. Other than that, I'll wrap this up. Please, please, please x456154 review! They make me really happy! :D**


	20. Forgiveness

**Bella.**

Edward and I had spent the remainder of the evening in our room, never moving from the comfortable embrace of each other's arms. Through the window, we stared in blissful silence as the sun dipped low in the sky, and the darkness enveloped us as neither one of us flipped the lamp on. We spent those long hours without light, but I didn't mind. And when the sun rose over the rocking tips of the trees beside the house, Edward welcomed the new day by pressing a long kiss to my throat.

But unfortunately, we couldn't stay like this forever, despite how badly I wanted to. I could hear Carmen and Esme downstairs from where we sat, discussing Tanya. Apparently, she was stopping by to announce her decision of whether she'd fight alongside with us or not. I wanted to my roll my eyes at the very thought. It would be fairly simple to just tell us her answer over the telephone. We didn't need to make a production of it.

Edward sensed my annoyance, and chuckled. He nodded in a silent agreement.

"I'm just grateful she's even considering it."

I sighed, dropping my pride and smiling in defeat. I had expected a war to come from Tanya, but not Kate. And I had expected the war to be fueled by some kind of jealous rage, either Tanya's, or my own- but not this. I couldn't even fathom how my own mouth, which was usually very polite and weary, had created all of this animosity and hatred. I had cost us two fighters, which might end up costing me two family members, if not my own life. But I had also cost myself two potential friends. The Denali's and Cullen's were close, but how close would they remain _now_? I knew Edward well enough to know that he wasn't going to speak to Kate or Irina unless the wedge between us was gone. But I didn't know how I was going to destroy that wedge if Kate wouldn't let me _speak_ to her.

Maybe I could write a letter. I could explain my side of the story, and enclose my deepest apologies. I could probably have it written and send it back with Tanya. If Kate was as wonderful as the Cullen's had ranted about, then hopefully she'd accept the letter and accept my apology. I smiled to myself, proud that I was making an effort. Wriggling out of Edward's arms without an explanation, I fumbled around in some of his cabinets, unsuccessfully finding a scrap piece of paper. I frowned.

"What are you looking for, Bella?"

"A piece of paper. I'm going to write Kate a letter of apology, and hopefully she'll forgive me," I explained, still searching random nooks and crannies. I watched Edward from the corner of my eye, probably by the fact that I was writing a letter of apology when he believed I was at fault for nothing. But he knew me well- and held his tongue, nodding silently. I smiled.

"I'm going to grab a piece from Carlisle's study," I suggested, and moved towards the door, opening it quickly. I jumped, startled in surprise as Alice stood on the other side, smiling softly. She shook her head, before sighing and leaning against the doorframe.

"She won't even open it. She'll rip it to shreds the second Tanya hands it to her."

My spirits fell, along with my face. Alice nodded, grimacing apologetically. I groaned in frustration, and threw my hands back. I knew that what I said might've been extremely offensive, but it'd be mature to listen to what I have to say before she completely pegs me for a horrible person.

I opened my mouth to recite my current aggravations, but Edward rose from the bed, placing a hand on my lower back. I looked up in confusion, and he smiled down at me.

"Tanya has arrived. Carlisle wants us to gather downstairs to meet with her," he explained, and I groaned once again. Both Edward and Alice laughed at my expense, and I grumbled as I followed them both down the long staircase. As I expected, the stunningly blonde vampire was here, perched on an armchair with her legs crossed and her lips pursed. I didn't greet her as I took my seat next to Edward on the couch, Emmett on my other side.

"Good morning everyone, good morning Bella," she announced, and I winced. Why was I acknowledged separately? My eyebrows burrowed in anger, my annoyance for the blonde vampire rising. Okay, maybe I didn't hate Tanya, but the way she treated me lately was getting on my last nerve. Edward stiffened next to me, before dropping one arm around my shoulder and throwing a sided glare at Tanya.

"I'm going to get straight to the point. I've thought about it, and going against Kate and Irina's wishes, I have decided to fight with you and the wolves," she announced proudly, raising her chin defiantly. I felt a bubble of excitement and admiration grow within me, and I had to resist the urge to lunge from the couch and hug my once almost enemy. I grinned, watching as Carmen jumped from the chair and wrapped her tiny arms around Tanya's neck in a grateful hug.

"We cannot thank you enough, Tanya," Carlisle beamed. I nodded furiously, my grin never falling as she whipped her head to look at me. Suddenly, her face grew cold and she shook her head. My dead heart fell to my chest again at the sight of her angry face. I tried to reverse my words, trying to find the culprit of her sudden bitterness, but I hadn't spoken since I was upstairs.

"My decision to fight has nothing to do with _you_. I am fighting for the Cullen's, because they are _my_ family. I am not fighting for you."

_Ouch_.

I was still wincing as I lowered myself further into Edward, who was shaking with anger. I opened my mouth, ready to recite my new meaningless apology, three voices cut me off at the same time.

"Stop being such a bitch!"

"She_ is _a part of this family!"

"You will not speak to Bella that way!"

A human would've missed all three voices, and all three shouts of anger. But with my new improved hearing, it was if each one rang in my ear at different speeds, allowing me to hear each one crystal clear. I recognized Emmett's voice responsible for the first shout, Alice's tiny but shrill voice created the second, but I was mostly astonished to realize who the last voice belonged to.

Carlisle was on two feet now, Esme at his side, whispering words of comfort to him. I lowered my face into my palms, feeling the humiliation as it crept up on me yet again. I had never seen Carlisle like this before. He was Carlisle. He was gentle, and kind, and unbelievably level-headed. He was nothing like the onyx eyed, golden haired, chest heaving man who stood before me.

Nobody spoke. Carlisle's outburst had all of us stunned to silence. If I could cry, the tears of embarrassment would've flooded the house. Edward's grip had gotten tighter, and if I were still human, all of the bones that structured my arms would've been crushed by now. I had to say something. I had to apologize, explain, defend, _something_. I opened my mouth a few times, but never found decent enough words to actually speak. I closed my eyes after a few moments, and let whatever popped into my head to pop out of my mouth.

"I'm sorry," I began, my voice resembling a desperate whisper. I took a breath to continue, but my plea of desperation had only contributed to Carlisle's sudden anger. I gulped as he shook his head, throwing a disgusted look at Tanya.

"Bella, I don't want to hear you apologizing. She has absolutely no right speaking to you with such hostility. You are a bigger part of this family than she is," he bellowed, before rushing up to me. I cowered, but didn't move back. Despite what it looked like, Carlisle would never hurt me. I knew this, and even if something possessed him to actually do so, Edward would see it coming.

He yanked my left hand towards him harshly, but I felt no pain. Grasping my fingers, he held them out to display for the rest of the vampires in the room. I heard Esme gasp excitedly from behind us, Rose and Alice were giggling, and Carmen was cooing gently at the sight of the magnificent ring that Edward had blessed my finger with last night.

"Bella and Edward are going to be married," he announced, and I was grateful to hear that his voice had lowered several octaves, and his calmness was slowly but surely returning. "If you consider us to be family, you will also consider her to be family as well. If not, I would much rather you didn't participate in the fight," he suggested, before lowering himself back down onto the chair. I bit back the urge to flee from the room, and stayed completely still.

My eyes were focused on the ground, and I didn't dare look up to see what kind of rage was filling Tanya's flawless face. But then I heard her sigh. It wasn't an angry sigh, or a frustrated sigh. It was just one that made my head snap up without further hesitation. She wasn't fuming. Her face wasn't contorted into different types of anger. She wasn't heaving with rage, or trying to keep herself calm. She was calm, and she wasn't angry.

I officially had no idea what was going on.

"Bella," she called out gently. I locked onto her gaze, and for once, I didn't feel intimidated. "I- I apologize for my behavior. I'm acting very childish, and it's very inappropriate. I will understand if you choose not to speak with me anymore," she apologized. Her voice hinted that she wasn't finished, but she stopped regardless. I sighed, trying to conjure up a coherent sentence.

"I just .. you, Kate and Irina are really special to my family, and I want the same chance to know you like that as well," I mumbled pathetically. Somebody's hand crept around my shoulder, but I couldn't tell who it belonged to. Tanya surprised me by smiling, and I almost had to take a few steps back.

"We have an eternity for that," she responded, and though I tried to fight it, I couldn't help the smile that tugged my lips upwards. I heard Alice giggling from my other side, and I quickly learned that it was her arm around my shoulder.

I could feel the tension lift dramatically. I nodded once, feeling a heavy weight roll off of my shoulders. I was vaguely aware of the chatter that began to stir around me, but I couldn't focus on any one conversation. Alice was at my side, tugging annoyingly on my arm, and I surrendered my attention to her.

"Let me see!" she exclaimed happily. I sighed as I extended my arm to her, and she grasped my fingers quickly. She let out another audible, high pitched squeal when the ring came into view, and suddenly, Esme, Carmen, Rose and Tanya were at my side, admiring it's beauty. Though this moment was completely cheesy, and girly, I couldn't erase the stupid grin that took over my face.

* * *

**Edward.**

Today had been a day of ups and downs. I had been on the edge of taking a snap at Tanya earlier today. I had a good look into her mind as we stepped into her room, and I immediately suspected the trouble. I could hear the words that she had shared with Kate before she came here. Kate was encouraging the hatred for Bella. She was filling Tanya's head with ideas that Bella would ruin the Cullen family, and split everybody apart.

If Kate's words weren't enough, Tanya actually_ listened_.

And it wasn't until Carlisle yelled at her- which was a very rare experience- that she let go of those crazy notions. I had spent my entire existence, never showing a preference for any female that I crossed paths with, and that was always a mystery to the Denali's. Tanya didn't believe my relationship with Bella was strong enough for marriage, but the second she saw the ring, every single one of those beliefs and thoughts disappeared.

I was extremely relieved that the tension had been broken. Sure, Tanya and Bella were still cautious of each other, but Tanya following behind us as we ran quickly to the clearing for our meeting with the wolves was proof that she actually was sorry.

We arrived to the clearing ten minutes prior to our scheduled gathering. We all sat soundlessly on the ground, awaiting the arrival of our four legged allies. Bella sat beside me, her head resting softly into the curve of my forearm. Her eyes were trained on the sky, and I watched as her gaze moved furiously through the stars. I chuckled, and she craned her neck to look up at me.

"Hard to keep count?" I asked sarcastically. She rolled her eyes, but lowered her head. It was a gesture I knew well, that was usually accompanied by her beautiful human blush.

"Oh, hush. I'm bored."

I chuckled again, and we sat in silence for a few more minutes, before I heard a howl rip through the forest. We all stood, waiting for them to charge through the forest. They weren't close enough for me to hear their thoughts, but we could all smell them coming as well.

_It hurts .. so bad .. so much pain._

I frowned at the lone voice that stood out. I moved forward, but a figure emerged from the forest entrance. It was a small wolf with soft grey fur. I recognized her immediately as Leah Clearwater, the older sister of Seth. She was limping, and her whine was loud and agonized. I gasped loudly.

_Help.. the others.. help me... please._

And then to my horror, she collapsed.

* * *

**Uh oh! What on earth is going on? I tried to clear some of the negative feelings toward Bella and Tanya, but to do so, I had to create more. But I think I did okay. Oh, and _please_ don't PM me to let me know how Bella would really react to things. I got so many last chapter. I know how Bella reacted to the real proposal. I've read Eclipse about fifty times. But this is_ fan_fiction**- **meaning that I, the fan, can write the fiction any way I choose. I'm not Stephenie Meyer, so of course this isn't going to be exactly the same. And if you paid attention, I mentioned that the reason Bella didn't overreact to the ring was because she was already a vampire. She didn't have to freak out because of what people would think of her- because she didn't have anybody but the Cullen's. There was nothing standing in her way, so that's why she didn't cause a huge uproar about it. She's mature and handling things nicely. Yeah. Haha. But anyway, I'm done with my rant. Let me know what you think of this chapter, please! **


	21. Faking It

**Bella.**

I didn't wait for an explanation on Edward's horrified gasp before I darted forward, my legs kicking as fast as they could possibly go. As I neared the whimpering wolf, I could smell the distinct stench of blood, and stopped myself when her injured body came into view. I inhaled a sharp breath, and stopped breathing before I closed the gap and kneeled next the wolf.

"What's happened to you?" I whispered in shock. Gashes were aligned along the stomach, coating areas of grey fur in dark, matted blood. I reached a shaky hand out to touch the wound and assess the damage, but the painful moan that the wolf emitted halted my actions.

"It's Leah Clearwater," I heard Edward announce behind me. I swallowed my sadness, and kept my attention on her. "Her thoughts are hazy. She's on the verge of losing consciousness, but I think the others are injured as well."

I froze. An icy shock of horror moved from my head to my toes, and I had to fight to keep from falling on the ground. _Jacob_. Jacob was injured.

I opened my mouth to speak, but it came out in a speechless gurgle. Edward moved to stand next to me, giving Carlisle room as he huddled close to Leah to study the gashes. I was trembling, and I couldn't find it in my heart to be patient for Leah. I had to get to Jake.

"I have to find Jake."

"Bella, I don't think it's safe at the moment. We don't know what has happened. This could very well be a trap. Victoria probably has her army waiting and we're still short so many-" Jasper stopped trying to convince me once he saw the furious shaking of my head. I snapped my neck up to look at Edward.

"I don't care if it's a trap, Edward. I just ..I can't stand here while he's possibly in pain, or dying, or-"

Edward took my face in his hands, instantly calming me and shutting me up. I gulped, and locked onto his gaze. He smiled sadly, and nodded.

"I understand, Bella. I know he's important to you. Carlisle, when you finish tending to Leah's injuries, you can join us. The rest of us will go check things out."

Jasper gasped in disbelief. "Edward, this is extremely dangerous. We could all get killed!"

I lowered my head in shame. I knew the danger of the situation. I knew the trouble that probably awaited us, and though Jake was important to me, I didn't want to put that on any of my family's shoulders.

"Maybe I should go. After all, I'm the reason we're in the mess. I don't want anybody else getting hurt on my account. It's not fair," I spoke firmly. Edward tensed immediately, and his grip around my shoulder tightened dramatically.

"No. That is out of the question. We're all going, or none of us is going."

"But I don't-" I stopped, huffing in frustration as I tried to think of a way to word my rebuttal. My eyes unwillingly glanced towards Jasper, and even though he was the empath, I felt the guilt radiating off of him in heaps. He grimaced.

"Edward's right, Bella. I apologize for my rudeness. This is a delicate situation, so I hope you excuse my behavior. We really have no time to gather more help, so this is it," he announced sadly. A deep throb pulled at my chest, and I bit my lip to quiet my sob. He sounded as if it were a guarantee that we were going to die.

But we _were_ going to war without any expectations. What else could we think?

I felt Edward's hand drop from my waist, and move lower until he laced his fingers with my own, and gripped my hand tightly. He pulled gently, and I followed him soundless into the forest entrance. I could hear the others moving silently behind us. It was unusually quiet, except for the rustle of bushes and twigs being stepped on. A bird would chirp every so often, but the silence swallowed us whole.

I let my mind wander over every single intimate moment that Edward and I shared, though there weren't that many. I lingered on the kisses, the embraces, the smiles .. everything. I hated that I was reminiscing as if I were about to die, but I didn't know what to expect, and it would be far better to let go with those memories in my head than otherwise.

We walked for about two miles, and with every step, I grew more terrified of what awaited us. The silence only increased intensely, and I silently wished that if there were ever a time that Emmett tell a lousy joke, it would be now. But as I threw a sided glance over my shoulder, I could see his tall, muscular frame huddled next to Rosalie, his face set in a permanent frown. The painful throb to my chest returned, and I turned away.

I prayed to whatever God was up there, that none of these couples would be split up. If anybody had to die, let it be _me_.

"I can hear them," Edward's voice brought me out of my reverie. I craned my neck to look at him, but he didn't return my gaze. He only tightened the hold on my hand, and pulled me along quicker.

"Are they okay? What are they thinking?" I begged desperately.

"They're hurt. They've been attacked. It's so .. painful to listen to this," he winced as closed his eyes tight. I bit my lip, hating that I wasn't able to help him. He couldn't turn it off, he was forced to listen to their agonized pleas for help.

"I can smell them," Jasper added, and as we turned around to look at him, we witnessed as he gasped loudly, and his steps faltered. Alice held her long arms around his waist, holding him up.

"What's wrong with Jasper?" I asked Edward frantically. Edward sighed.

"He's feeling their pain. We're not far now."

Not even minutes later, I saw the first wolf, lying in a crumpled heap on the ground. His body was moving slowly, up and down in rhythm with their labored breaths. Just like Leah, his dark brown fur was matted down with damp crimson blood. I clamped a hand over my mouth as my eyes moved up, and I surveyed the scene.

Six wolves lay scattered amongst the forest floor, heaving breaths and dripping blood. It was obvious that they were fighting for their lives. Alice, Jasper, Emmett, Rosalie, Esme and Tanya spread out to individually examine each wolf, as Edward and I stayed near the dark brown one by our feet. As Edward kneeled down and began murmuring words of comfort to the wolf, I caught a glimpse of a shaking, russet colored wolf to the left of me. Jacob.

I sprinted to his side immediately, and found myself on my knees beside him. My hands were running through his fur, which was bloodied up just like the others. I opened my mouth to say something, but my bottom lip trembled and I couldn't speak.

"J-Jake?"

He opened his eye, and a bright white stare gazed back at me. I sobbed, and hunched over him, holding onto his enormous frame. I didn't care that I was possibly drenching myself in wolf blood, I didn't care about anything except for that my best friend was badly injured.

"His injuries aren't as bad as the others. He wants me to tell you that as soon as you get off of his tail, he'll get up," I heard Edward chuckle behind me. I gasped, and quickly moved away from him. As promised, Jacob rose on all fours.

"What the hell, Jacob?" I spat angrily.

"He only did it to keep himself alive, Bella. It was, as we suspected, Victoria and her army that did this. All of them are actually quite fine, but they would've been killed if they hadn't of faked near death," he explained. I sighed heavily in relief.

"So what happened to Victoria and the others?"

"When the wolves began to embellish their injuries, she left in hopes that they'd have a slow, painful death. They couldn't take down the vampires because there was far too many of them, and they didn't want to risk anything."

That didn't explain why Leah had limped her way into the clearing. If they weren't seriously injured, why would she risk running into Victoria's army elsewhere while looking for help?

"And Leah?" I asked.

"Leah was the only one that was seriously injured. She was the first one they attacked. They actually ambushed her, and before any of the others could help her, she was dragged into the forest. I'm guessing once they believed she was dying as well, they left her, and she dragged herself to us."

Everything pieced together, and I had never felt more relief in my entire life. The fear that had been pounding through my entire body had dulled, but I still trembled at the thought. If I had reacted this badly to a fake situation, how out of control would I be during the real battle?

"This was .. it was horrible, Edward. If something really happened to Jacob, I don't know what I would've done," I whispered, wincing at the thought. Edward sighed softly, and moved closer to take me in his arms, when I heard a voice from behind me speak.

"What do you take me for, a porcelain doll? Give me some credit, Bells. I know how to take down a reeking blood-sucker," Jacob boomed from behind me. I couldn't help but grin, and without hesitation, turned around and jumped into his arms. He laughed and held me closer to him.

"You asshole. Why did you let me sit there and grieve like that?"

"It was nice. A big reassurance that you really do care about me," he retorted, following it with a low chuckle. I punched him hard in the shoulder, and he hissed in pain, dropping his grip and cradling his forearm.

"God damnit, Bella. I liked you better when you were weak!"

I laughed, and stepped backward, leaning into Edward's chest. For the second time, I took in the scene before me. Every wolf that had been sprawled across the ground was now up and moving in their human forms. I recognized Leah's naked body wrapped in a heavy blanket on the ground, while Sam held her head in his lap and Seth rocked frantically as Carlisle attended to her wounds.

As I stared at Sam, Seth and Leah, I began to feel remorse. I truly was the cause of all of this. Victoria wanted to kill me, because Edward had killed James. And Edward had killed James because of _me_. For me. This entire battle was unnecessary. I knew what Victoria wanted, and my family and the lives of the Quilete's didn't need to be risked to stop her.

I just had to give her what she wanted.

I gulped as a small plan formulated in my head. As I took another glance at Sam, Seth and Leah, I knew I had to do something. I wouldn't be the cause of families being destroyed, of _love_ being destroyed. I couldn't do that to anybody.

Alice coughed loudly from her stance at a tree stump, swinging the length of her legs that didn't touch the ground back and fourth. I turned to look at her curiously, and was surprised at the glare that she threw me. I turned around to ask Edward what her problem was, but he was discussing something heatedly with Paul and Emmett.

I raised my eyebrows at Alice, and she jumped off of the stump, dancing merrily to where I stood. She leaned in, and her lips were inches away from my ear. I could feel her icy breath on my neck, but I stayed rigid.

"You've already done enough noble things in your life, Bella. Don't even think about it," she warned me harshly. I opened my mouth to speak, but when she pulled her head away from my ear, I saw her usual golden eyes darkened to a pitch black.

"Alice, I-"

"I don't particularly enjoy seeing visions of my best friend being ripped to shreds by a group of vengeful vampires. I'd appreciate it if I didn't receive another one," she demanded, before turning on her heel and walking away.

* * *

**I'M SORRY. 4 months is an _unacceptable_ delay on a story, and I know that. But if any of you that read this are writers yourself, you know that sometimes you write yourself into a wall, and you have to stop and think about what way you're going to go. Unfortunately, my thinking process took an extremely long time. I won't lie and say I was extremely busy, because I made time to update my other story, but I have attempted this many, many times. But I'm the kind of person that won't just write to update. I'd rather you all wait and get a good chapter than just force myself to write a crappy chapter so you'll get an update. But anyway, I hope this was worth the wait. Let me know what you think about the comeback chapter & review please! I kind of lost motivating after the last chapter, but I'm hoping you guys will bring it back. :D**


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